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Xpucu > Xpucu's Quotes

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  • #1
    Terry Pratchett
    “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Diggers
    tags: humor, open-mind, thinking
    21433 likes

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  • #2
    Terry Pratchett
    “If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies
    tags: cats, humor, life
    5176 likes

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  • #3
    Terry Pratchett
    “I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any thinking going on inside it.”
    ― Terry Pratchett
    2214 likes

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  • #4
    Terry Pratchett
    “In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.”
    ― Terry Pratchett
    4292 likes

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  • #5
    Terry Pratchett
    “Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Small Gods
    tags: humor, science
    4308 likes

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  • #6
    Terry Pratchett
    “Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one.”
    ― Terry Pratchett
    tags: fantasy, humor, imagination, literature, stories
    6660 likes

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  • #7
    Terry Pratchett
    “Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
    2160 likes

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  • #8
    Terry Pratchett
    “Just erotic. Nothing kinky. It's the difference between using a feather and using a chicken.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Eric
    tags: erotic, kinky, suggestive
    1504 likes

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  • #9
    Terry Pratchett
    “No! Please! I'll tell you whatever you want to know!" the man yelled.
    "Really?" said Vimes. "What's the orbital velocity of the moon?"
    "What?"
    "Oh, you'd like something simpler?”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
    tags: absurd, humor, interrogation, police
    1976 likes

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  • #10
    Terry Pratchett
    “Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.”
    ― Terry Pratchett
    tags: humor, life
    3608 likes

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  • #11
    Terry Pratchett
    “In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies
    tags: humor, metaphysics, physics, science
    3506 likes

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  • #12
    Terry Pratchett
    “Studies have shown that an ant can carry one hundred times its own weight, but there is no known limit to the lifting power of the average tiny eighty-year-old Spanish peasant grandmother.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Reaper Man
    tags: humor
    440 likes

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  • #13
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
    tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
    148370 likes

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  • #14
    “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
    ― Narcotics Anonymous
    tags: humor, insanity, life, misattributed-ben-franklin, misattributed-mark-twain, misattributed-to-einstein
    64645 likes

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  • #15
    “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
    ― Paul Terry
    tags: exercise, humor, laziness, misattributed-to-hutchins
    24401 likes

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  • #16
    Mark Twain
    “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
    ― Mark Twain
    34482 likes

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  • #17
    Steve Martin
    “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
    ― Steve Martin
    tags: humor, obvious, simile
    35269 likes

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  • #18
    Robert A. Heinlein
    “Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
    ― Robert A. Heinlein
    tags: cats, humor, women
    28793 likes

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  • #19
    Charles J. Sykes
    “Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”
    ― Charles J. Sykes, Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But Can't Read, Write or Add
    tags: humor, misattributed-to-bill-gates, nerd, nerds, work
    15560 likes

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  • #20
    Terry Pratchett
    “Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Jingo
    tags: humor, proverb
    12933 likes

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  • #21
    Terry Pratchett
    “Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH', the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time
    tags: humor
    10164 likes

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  • #22
    W.C. Fields
    “I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ”
    ― W.C. Fields
    18685 likes

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  • #23
    Terry Pratchett
    “It's not worth doing something unless someone, somewhere, would much rather you weren't doing it.”
    ― Terry Pratchett
    3098 likes

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  • #24
    Terry Pratchett
    “Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, A Hat Full of Sky
    tags: full, hat, pratchett, sky, terry
    1518 likes

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  • #25
    Terry Pratchett
    “I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
    Death thought about it.
    CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Sourcery
    tags: cats, death, life
    3630 likes

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  • #26
    Terry Pratchett
    “His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools -- the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans -- and summed up all three of them in his famous phrase, 'You can't trust any bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing you can do about it, so let's have a drink.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Small Gods
    1037 likes

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  • #27
    Terry Pratchett
    “It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever," he said. "Have you thought of going into teaching?”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Mort
    tags: discworld, humor, humour, teaching
    1732 likes

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  • #28
    Terry Pratchett
    “And what would humans be without love?"
    RARE, said Death.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Sourcery
    2186 likes

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  • #29
    Terry Pratchett
    “There is a rumour going around that I have found God. I think this is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist.”
    ― Terry Pratchett
    1977 likes

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  • #30
    Terry Pratchett
    “Did I do anything last night that suggested I was sane?”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal
    tags: drunkenness, insanity
    800 likes



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Tags From Xpucu’s Quotes

humor
open-mind
thinking
cats
life
science
fantasy
imagination
literature
stories
erotic
kinky
suggestive
absurd
interrogation
police
metaphysics
physics
attributed-no-source
human-nature
infinity
philosophy
stupidity
universe
insanity
misattributed-ben-franklin
misattributed-mark-twain
misattributed-to-einstein
exercise
laziness
misattributed-to-hutchins
obvious
simile
women
misattributed-to-bill-gates
nerd
nerds
work
proverb
full
hat
pratchett
sky
terry
death
discworld
humour
teaching
drunkenness