Henry > Henry's Quotes

“Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.”
― Roald Dahl

“So please, oh please, we beg, we pray,
Go throw your TV set away,
And in its place you can install
A lovely bookshelf on the wall.
Then fill the shelves with lots of books.”
― Roald Dahl, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

“Don't gobblefunk around with words.”
― Roald Dahl, The BFG

“So Matilda’s strong young mind continued to grow, nurtured by the voices of all those authors who had sent their books out into the world like ships on the sea. These books gave Matilda a hopeful and comforting message: You are not alone.”
― Roald Dahl, Matilda

“Matilda said, "Never do anything by halves if you want to get away with it. Be outrageous. Go the whole hog. Make sure everything you do is so completely crazy it's unbelievable...”
― Roald Dahl, Matilda

“A person is a fool to become a writer. His only compensation is absolute freedom. He has no master except his own soul, and that, I am sure, is why he does it”
― Roald Dahl

“Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!”
― Roald Dahl

“I'll be famous one day, but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons." - Greg Heffley,”
― Jeff Kinney, Diary of a Wimpy Kid

“If there's one thing I learned from Rodrick, it's to set people's expectations real low so you end up surprising them by practically doing nothing at all.”
― Jeff Kinney, Diary of a Wimpy Kid

“You can't expect everyone to have the same dedication as you.”
― Jeff Kinney, Diary of a Wimpy Kid

“Dear Aunt Loretta,
Thank you so much for the awesome pants!
How did you know I wanted that for Christmas?
I love the way the pants look on my legs!
All my friends will be so jealous that I have my very own pants.
Thank you for making this the best Christmas ever!
Sincerely, Greg”
― Jeff Kinney, Diary of a Wimpy Kid

“Zoo-Wee Mama!”
― Jeff Kinney

“So if you want to find somebody to blame for the way i am, I guess you'd have to start with the public education system.”
― Jeff Kinney, Dog Days

“I'm not really sure what makes a book a 'classic' to begin with, but I think it has to be at least fifty years old and some person or animal has to die at the end.”
― Jeff Kinney

“So I've started wearing sweatpants to bed because I really don't need Santa seeing me in my underwear.”
― Jeff Kinney, Cabin Fever

“You and your group of nerds fall into a pit and it's full of dynamite and you blow up. The End.”
― Jeff Kinney, Rodrick Rules

“First of all, let me get this straight: This is a JOURNAL, not a diary. I know what it says on the cover, but when Mom went out to buy this thing I SPECIFICALLY told her to get one that didn't say 'diary' on it.”
― Jeff Kinney

“Youre gonna grow up and marry some ice cream! Haha!”
― Jeff Kinney, Rodrick Rules

“hot pink looks cute on only janet which is MEEEEEEE!!!”
― Jeff Kinney, Dog Days

“I'm having a seriously hard time getting used to the fact that summer is over and I have to get out of bed every morning to go to school.”
― Jeff Kinney, Diary of a Wimpy Kid

“How do you make a sausage roll? ... Roll it down a hill!”
― Liz Pichon, What Monster?

“Great, now the whole school knows I'm late. And Mrs Mumble has made me sound like I'm some kind of parcel.”
― Liz Pichon, Genius Ideas (Mostly)

“All you can do in this life is follow your dreams. Otherwise you're just wasting your time.”
― David Walliams, Gangsta Granny

“In Britain, a cup of tea is the answer to every problem.
Fallen off your bicycle? Nice cup of tea.
Your house has been destroyed by a meteorite? Nice cup of tea and a biscuit.
Your entire family has been eaten by a Tyrannosaurus Rex that has travelled through a space/time portal? Nice cup of tea and a piece of cake. Possibly a savoury option would be welcome here too, for example a Scotch egg or a sausage roll.”
― David Walliams, Mr Stink

“It's strange how sometimes you can be so happy it goes all the way round to sadness.”
― David Walliams, Billionaire Boy

“I think all those rules are boring. About what people can and can't wear. Surely everyone should be able to wear whatever they like?”
― David Walliams, The Boy in the Dress

“But children nowadays don't believe in magic. They are forever watching TV and playing computer games. They never look to the skies any more.”
― David Walliams, Demon Dentist

“You mustn't let bullies get you down.”
― David Walliams, Mr Stink

“Comfort eating or pure greed? Most likely a mixture of both. Pieces of cake or biscuits or chocolate could instantly sweeten the sourness of my life. If you have been called gay all day in the playground, a cake when you returned home from school offered some consolation. A fairy cake of course.”
― David Walliams, Camp David

“All our lives are hard in one way or another... But listen to me... We need to be kind to each other, and stick together, OK? This place is tough enough without you making my life a misery.”
― David Walliams, RatBurger