Quotes - Gavin Harris Showing 1-11 of 11

#1

“Résumé
Razors pain you,
Rivers are damp,
Acids stain you,
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful,
Nooses give,
Gas smells awful.
You might as well live.”
― Dorothy Parker, Enough Rope

tags: dark-humor, humor, suicide

2225 likes

#2

“The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.”
― Dorothy Parker

1980 likes

#3

“By the time you swear you're his,
Shivering and sighing.
And he vows his passion is,
Infinite, undying.
Lady make note of this --
One of you is lying.”
― Dorothy Parker

tags: courtship, cynicism, love, lying, passion

1954 likes

#4

“Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.”
― Dorothy Parker

tags: dorothy-parker, heterosexuality, homosexuality, humor, wit

1629 likes

#5

“Don't look at me in that tone of voice.”
― Dorothy Parker

tags: disapproval, humor, wordplay

1425 likes

#6

“I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host.”
― Dorothy Parker, The Collected Dorothy Parker

tags: drinking, drunken-behaviour, humor

1310 likes

#7

“Inventory:

"Four be the things I am wiser to know:
Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe.
Four be the things I'd been better without:
Love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt.
Three be the things I shall never attain:
Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.
Three be the things I shall have till I die:
Laughter and hope and a sock in the eye.”
― Dorothy Parker, The Complete Poems of Dorothy Parker

tags: champagne, contentment, curiosity, doubt, envy, foes, friends, hope, idleness, inventory, knowledge, laughter, life, love, sorrow, sufficienty, superfluity, unattainable, values, wisdom

1172 likes

#8

“What fresh hell is this?”
― Dorothy Parker, The Portable Dorothy Parker

1033 likes

#9

“If I didn't care for fun and such,
I'd probably amount to much.
But I shall stay the way I am,
Because I do not give a damn.”
― Dorothy Parker, Enough Rope

tags: apathy, fame, pleasure

814 likes

#10

“Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.”
― Dorothy Parker

586 likes

#11

“I won't telephone him. I'll never telephone him again as long as I live. He'll rot in hell, before I'll call him up. You don't have to give me strength, God; I have it myself. If he wanted me, he could get me. He knows where I am. He knows I'm waiting here. He's so sure of me, so sure. I wonder why they hate you, as soon as they are sure of you.”
― Dorothy Parker, The Portable Dorothy Parker

tags: calling, love, men, relationships

569 likes

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