Olivene Brown > Olivene's Quotes

“I recalled a sermon Burke had delivered months ago, when everything from the Jew hole was still safely abstract, wisdom I could enjoy in the unactionable pit of my mind. They will sniff at your legs, went Burke’s sermon. They will wish they were you. Beware the man on his knees, the display of weakness. But the sermon had not passed through the radio coherently that day; static cloaked the transmission. Every other word was weakness, as if the broadcast were looping by mistake. We were to fear weakness not in oneself, where it should be cherished, but in others. Or not fear it, but mistrust it. We too easily believe in the trouble of others, erect a machinery of caring. Look through the story at the teller’s need, was the caution. Share not your full story, went the warning.”
― Ben Marcus, The Flame Alphabet

“I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.”
― Christopher Moore, Practical Demonkeeping

“I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry.”
― Christopher Moore, Practical Demonkeeping

“Love needs room to grow. Like a rose. Or a tumor.”
― Christopher Moore, Fool

“So nerds rule.”
― Christopher Moore, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove

“Fuckstockings!”
― Christopher Moore

“Praying is talking to God. Meditating is listening.”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal

“You should know I disagree with a lot of traditional advice. For instance, they say the best revenge is living well. I say it’s acid in the face—who will love them now?”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“I'm the kind of person who would rather get my hopes up really high and watch them get dashed to pieces than wisely keep my expectations at bay and hope they are exceeded. This quality has made me a needy and theatrical friend, but has given me a spectacularly dramatic emotional life.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“In my mind, the sexiest thing in the world is the feeling that you’re wanted.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“I simply regard romantic comedies as a subgenre of sci-fi, in which the world created therein has different rules than my regular human world.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“There Has Ceased to Be a Difference Between My Awake Clothes and My Asleep Clothes”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“Why didn’t you talk about whether women are funny or not?

I just felt that by commenting on that in any real way, it would be tacit approval of it as a legitimate debate, which it isn’t.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“When I was in junior high I read a lot of Danielle Steele. So I always assumed that the day I got engaged I'd be naked, covered in rose petals, and sleeping with the brother of the man who'd kidnapped me.”
― Jenny Lawson, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir

“Depression lies and that I can’t trust my own critical judgment when I’m sick”
― Jenny Lawson, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir

“Life is like a novel. It's filled with suspense. You have no idea what is going to happen until you turn the page.”
― sidney sheldon

“and whenever I had menstral cramps, I could just pretend that Voldemort was close.”
― Jenny Lawson

“I try to be appreciative of what I have instead of bitter about what I’ve lost.”
― Jenny Lawson, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir

“In short? It is exhausting being me. Pretending to be normal is draining and requires amazing amounts of energy and Xanax.”
― Jenny Lawson, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir

“Be careful what you wish for. There's always a catch.”
― Laurie Halse Anderson, Wintergirls

“If they don’t keep exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“It gives me my headache just trying to think down to your level”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“Don’t pretend you want to talk to me, I know you hate me.” “No, I don’t.” “Yes, you do, everybody does. It’s part of the shape of the Universe. I only have to talk to somebody and they begin to hate me. Even robots hate me. If you just ignore me I expect I shall probably go away.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

“Looking up into the night sky is looking into infinity — distance is incomprehensible and therefore meaningless”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“Rubbish, we don't want to be happy, we want to be famous!" (Lunkwill)”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“Sometimes the sins you haven't committed are all you have left to hold onto.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“It's just a penis, right? Probably no worse for you than smoking.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“Given enough time, I guess anything can look good. All it has to do is survive.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“I wanted it, I wanted, I wanted, but the moment it was mine, it ceased to interest me.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important rule of beauty, which is: who cares?”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants