Jose Anthonio > Jose's Quotes

“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.”
― Benjamin Franklin

“I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”
― W.C. Fields

“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

[misquote of a letter about wine, see quotes/831031]”
― Benjamin Franklin

“Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”
― Frank Sinatra

“An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.”
― Ernest Hemingway

“Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable.”
― G.K. Chesterton, Heretics: The Annotated

“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so?
There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”
― Drew Carey

“Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy!”
― Warren Ellis

“Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.”
― W.C. Fields

“Next to music, beer was best.”
― Carson McCullers, The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter

“I don't have a drinking problem 'Cept when I can't get a drink.”
― Tom Waits

“There comes a time in every woman's life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne.”
― Bette Davis

“Do you drink?"
"Of course,I just said I was a writer.”
― Stephen King

“One more drink and I'll be under the host.”
― Mae West

“To alcohol! The cause of... and solution to... all of life's problems”
― Matt Groening

“Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.”
― Ogden Nash, Hard Lines

“Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, may produce all the effects of drunkenness.”
― Oscar Wilde

“Fell in love with a beautiful blonde once. Drove me to drink. And I never had the decency to thank her.”
― W.C. Fields

“I don’t drink water, because if water can erode rock, think what it can do to flesh.”
― Jarod Kintz, This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucks

“The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.”
― Jeff Foxworthy

“I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.”
― Darynda Jones, First Grave on the Right

“Ignorance is a lot like alcohol: the more you have of it, the less you are able to see its effect on you.”
― Jay Bylsma

“Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages.”
― Louis Pasteur

“A man who drinks too much on occasion is still the same man as he was sober. An alcoholic, a real alcoholic, is not the same man at all. You can't predict anything about him for sure except that he will be someone you never met before.”
― Raymond Chandler, The Long Goodbye

“It comes in pints?”
― Peter Jackson

“I always take Scotch whiskey at night as a preventive of toothache. I have never had the toothache; and what is more, I never intend to have it.”
― Mark Twain

“I like bars just after they open for the evening. When the air inside is still cool and clean and everything is shiny and the barkeep is giving himself that last look in the mirror to see if his tie is straight and his hair is smooth. I like the neat bottles on the bar back and the lovely shining glasses and the anticipation. I like to watch the man mix the first one of the evening and put it down on a crisp mat and put the little folded napkin beside it. I like to taste it slowly. The first quiet drink of the evening in a quiet bar—that's wonderful.”
― Raymond Chandler, The Long Goodbye

“When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument.”
― C.S. Forester, The African Queen

“When you stop drinking, you have to deal with this marvelous personality that started you drinking in the first place.”
― Jimmy Breslin

“It was my Uncle George who discovered alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.”
― P.G. Wodehouse