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#1

“Have you fallen in love with the wrong person yet?'
Jace said, "Unfortunately, Lady of the Haven, my one true love remains myself."
..."At least," she said, "you don't have to worry about rejection, Jace Wayland."
"Not necessarily. I turn myself down occasionally, just to keep it interesting.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: city-of-bones, jace

24155 likes

#2

“I don't want to be a man," said Jace. "I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can't confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead."
"Well," said Luke, "you're doing a fantastic job.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: clary-fray, demons, growing-up, humor, jace-wayland, luke, teenager

12357 likes

#3

“Jesus!" Luke exclaimed.
"Actually, it's just me," said Simon. "Although I've been told the resemblance is startling.”
― Cassandra Clare

tags: humor, jace-wayland, simon-lewis

13662 likes

#4

“Don't touch any of my weapons without my permission."
"Well, there goes my plan for selling them all on eBay," Clary muttered.
"Selling them on what?"
Clary smiled blandly at him. "A mythical place of great magical power.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: clary-fray, ebay, jace-wayland, myth

9764 likes

#5

“We came to see Jace. Is he alright?"
"I don't know," Magnus said. "Does he normally just lie on the floor like that without moving?”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: clary-fray, magnus-bane

10381 likes

#6

“Do you remember back at the hotel when you promised that if we lived, you’d get dressed up in a nurse’s outfit and give me a sponge bath?" asked Jace.
"It was Simon who promised you the sponge bath."
"As soon as I’m back on my feet, handsome," said Simon.
"I knew we should have left you a rat.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: bath, clary-fray, humor, jace-wayland, simon-lewis

8202 likes

#7

“I am a man" he told her, "and men do not consume pink beverages. Get thee gone woman, and bring me something brown.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Glass

tags: brown, city-of-glass, clare, isabelle, jace

6999 likes

#8

“It means 'Shadowhunters: Looking Better in Black Than the Widows of our Enemies Since 1234'.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: humor, jace-wayland, sarcasm

9243 likes

#9

“Not everything is about you," Clary said furiously.
"Possibly," Jace said, "but you do have to admit that the majority of things are.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Glass

tags: clary-fray, ego, jace-wayland

7039 likes

#10

“Well, I’m not kissing the mundane," said Jace. "I’d rather stay down here and rot."
"Forever?" said Simon. "Forever’s an awfully long time."
Jace raised his eyebrows. "I knew it," he said. "You want to kiss me, don’t you?”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: humor, jace-wayland, simon-lewis

7291 likes

#11

“I am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass.”
― Cassandra Clare

tags: simon

5573 likes

#12

“Malachi scowled. "I don't remember the Clave inviting you into the Glass City, Magnus Bane."
"They didn't," Magnus said. "Your wards are down."
"Really?" the Consul's voice dripped sarcasm. "I hadn't noticed."
Magnus looked concerned. "That's terrible. Someone should have told you." He glanced at Luke. "Tell him the wards are down.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Glass

tags: consul, humor, magnus-bane, sarcasm

7819 likes

#13

“You said you were going for a walk!? What kind of walk takes six hours?"
"A long one?”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Glass

tags: mortal-instruments

6644 likes

#14

“That does it," said Jace. "I'm going to get you a dictionary for Christmas this year."
"Why?" Isabelle said.
"So you can look up 'fun.' I'm not sure you know what it means.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: dictionary, fun, humor, isabelle-lightwood, jace-wayland

6183 likes

#15

“Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a little crazy. One minute you're munching a faerie plum, the next minute you're running naked down Madison Avenue with antlers on your head. Not," he added hastily, "that this has ever happened to me.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: cassandra-clare, city-of-bones, jace, mortal-instruments

5435 likes

#16

“One of the Silent Brothers is here to see you. Hodge sent me to wake you up. Actually he offered to wake you himself, but since it's 5 a.m., I figured you'd be less cranky if you had something nice to look at."
"Meaning you?"
"What else?”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

5134 likes

#17

“Can I help you with something?"
Clary turned instant traitor against her gender. "Those girls on the other side of the car are staring at you."
Jace assumed an air of mellow gratification. "Of course they are," he said, "I am stunningly attractive.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: city-of-bones, clary, jace

4989 likes

#18

“Investigation?" Isabelle laughed. "Now we're detectives? Maybe we should all have code names."
"Good idea," said Jace. "I shall be Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: humor, investigation, isabelle-lightwood, jace-wayland, joke

4797 likes

#19

“You see, cuckoos are parasites. They lay their eggs in other birds' nests. When the egg hatches, the baby cuckoo pushes the other baby birds out of the nest. The poor parent birds work themselves to death trying to find enough food to feed the enormous cuckoo child who has murdered their babies and taken their places."
"Enormous?" said Jace. "Did you just call me fat?"
"It was an analogy."
"I am not fat.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

4300 likes

#20

“No, I'm just a very naughty boy. I do all sorts of bad things. I kick kittens. I make rude gestures at nuns.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

4137 likes

#21

“Just because you call an electric eel a rubber duck doesn't make it a rubber duck, does it? And God help the poor bastard who decides they want to take a bath with the duckie. (Jace Wayland)”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: city-of-bones, humor, jace-wayland

4409 likes

#22

“You guessed? You must have been pretty sure, considering you could have killed me."
"I was ninety percent sure."
"I see," Clary said. There must have been something in her voice, because he turned to look at her. Her hand cracked across his face, a slap that rocked him back on his heels. He put his hands on his cheek, more in surprise than pain.
"What the hell was that for?"
"The other ten percent.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: humor, paranormal-romance

5126 likes

#23

“Mom. I have something to tell you. I’m undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I’m here to tell you that undead are just like you and me … well, okay. Possibly more like me than you.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: city-of-ashes, humor, mortal-instruments, simon, vampire

4352 likes

#24

“I've got a stele we can use. Who wants to do me?"
"A regrettable choice of words," muttered Magnus.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: jace-wayland, magnus-bane, regret, stele

5267 likes

#25

“Is standing by the window muttering about blood something he does all the time?" asked Simon.
"No," Jace said. "Sometimes he sits on the couch and does it.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

4034 likes

#26

“Will looked horrified. "What kind of monster could possibly hate chocolate?”
― Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Angel

tags: chocolate, monsters

5682 likes

#27

“Remember when you tried to convince me to feed a poultry pie to the mallards in the park to see if you could breed a race of cannibal ducks?"

"They ate it too," Will reminisced. "Bloodthirsty little beasts. Never trust a duck.”
― Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Angel

tags: jem-carstairs, will-herondale

6531 likes

#28

“Don't stop there. I suppose there are also, what, vampires and werewolves and zombies?"
"Of course there are. Although you mostly find zombies farther south, where the voudun priests are."
"What about mummies? Do they only hang around Egypt?"
"Don't be ridiculous. No one believes in mummies.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: clary-fray, jace-wayland, joke, mummies, sarcasm, vampire, werewolf, zombies

3942 likes

#29

“You know," Gabriel said, "there was a time I thought we could be friends, Will."

"There was a time I thought I was a ferret," Will said, "but that turned out to be the opium haze. Did you know it had that effect? Because I didn't.”
― Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Angel

tags: ferret

4777 likes

#30

“What's this?" he demanded, looking from Clary to his companions, as if they might know what she was doing there.
"It's a girl," Jace said,recovering his composure. "Surely you've seen girls before, Alec. Your sister Isabelle is one.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: humor, jace, love, mortal-instruments

4766 likes

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