Lumiere > Lumiere's Quotes

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#1

“I know of a cure for everything: salt water...in one way or the other. Sweat, or tears, or the salt sea.”
― Karen Blixen

2729 likes

#2

“Gracious ignored him. "A farmer's daughter, she was, though back then every girl was a farmer's daughter. Or a farmer. She had long hair like rope, and a nose. All her eyes were blue and she had a smile like a radiant hole in the ground, with teeth. God, she was beautiful."

"She sounds terrifying," said Donegan.

"Hush, you. I will hear no bad word spoken of your sister.”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

tags: dead-men, donegan, flattery, gracious, humour, skulduggery-pleasant

40 likes

#3

“And what, if you don’t mind me asking, is really important?”

Valkyrie holds her hand palm upwards, and it starts to glow from within. She smiles at him.

“Magic,” she says.”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

19 likes

#4

“He stood there, looking at her. She glared back, opened her mouth to continue the conversation, but he suddenly turned, walked away, like he'd just remembered that she may look and sound and talk like Valkyrie Cain, but she wasn't Valkyrie Cain.

And she never would be.”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

tags: derek-landy, skulduggery-pleasant, the-dying-of-the-light, valkyrie-cain

27 likes

#5

“Have to be honest with you Darquesse, I cannot feel that. That must be one of your special abilities, because to me, it looks like you just killed a whole bunch of people for no reason."

"Oh," said Darquesse. "That's so sad”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

tags: crazy, darquesse, death, humour, insane, not-normal, psychopath, skulduggery, so-crazy, sociopath, you-crazy-psycho-you

19 likes

#6

“There’s nothing I would change about the last few years. Valkyrie has proven herself to be an astonishing individual and one I would gladly lay down my life for, such as it is. How many people leading normal lives would you be able to say that about?”

“Until the end,” Valkyrie said softly.

Skulduggery looked at her, his head tilting gently.”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

22 likes

#7

“Violence?"Skulduggery said. "Violence is never the answer, until it's the only answer.”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

tags: skulduggery, the-answer, the-only-one-she-ever-feared, the-question, true, violence

57 likes

#8

“Punishment is not the answer. Punishment is easy. It’s lazy. Redemption is hard. Redemption makes you work.”
-Skulduggery”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

38 likes

#9

“It was a trap. It was so obviously a trap.

Darquesse smiled.”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

tags: don-t-even-care, humour, i-want, skulduggery, trap, wow

15 likes

#10

“Doors are for people with no imagination.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

tags: creativity

1237 likes

#11

“Being a detective isn't all about torture and murder and monsters. Sometimes it gets truly unpleasant...The fate of the world may depend on whether or not you can bring yourself to visit your relatives.”
― Derek Landy

tags: family, humor

666 likes

#12

“Are you going to shoot me?' Vengeous sneered. 'I wouldn't be surprised. What would a thing like you know about honor? Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.'

And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

633 likes

#13

“We're not retreating, we're advancing in reverse.' --Skulduggery Pleasant”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

tags: humor, skuldugerry-pleasant

586 likes

#14

“They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said.

China glanced at her. "They've obviously never met me.”
― Derek Landy, Mortal Coil

tags: derek-landy, humor, sarcasm, skuldugerry-pleasant, wit

581 likes

#15

“What is it?' Stephanie whispered.
'That, my dear Valkyrie, is what we call a monster.'
She looked at Skulduggery. 'You don't know what it is, do you?'
'I told you what it is, it's a horrible monster. Now shut up before it comes over here and eats us.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

466 likes

#16

“Stairs," Valkyrie said, disappointed.
"Not just ordinary stairs," Skulduggery told her as he led the way down. "Magic stairs."
"Really?"
"Oh, yes."
She followed him into the darkness. "How are they magic?"
"They just are."
"In what way?"
"In a magicky way."
She glared at the back of his head. "They aren't magic at all, are they?"
"Not really.”
― Derek Landy, Mortal Coil

tags: conversation, derek-landy, funny, humor, magic, skulduggery-pleasant, stairs, valkyrie

468 likes

#17

“Kindness suits you."

"Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.”
― Derek Landy

tags: allergic, derek-landy, humour, kindness, skulduggery-pleasant

459 likes

#18

“I'm placing you under arrest for murder, conspiracy to commit murder and, I don't know, possibly littering.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

tags: funny

515 likes

#19

“Vengeous scowled. 'As you can see,' he said, 'you are vastly outnumbered.'

I usually am.'

Your situation has become quite untenable.'

It usually does.'

You are within moments of being swarmed by these filthy creatures of undeath and torn apart in a maelstrom of pain and fury.'

Skulduggery paused. 'Okay, that's a new one on me.”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

356 likes

#20

“So that plan worked out well."

"Skulduggery, your entire plan consisted of, and I quote, "Let's get up close and then see what happens."'

"All the same," he said, "I think the whole thing worked out rather beautifully.”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

386 likes

#21

“Valkyrie patted Fletcher’s arm. “Don’t worry,” she said. “If the bad man comes, I’ll protect you.”
“If the bad man comes,” Fletcher responded, “I’ll bravely give out a high-pitched scream to distract him. I may even bravely faint, to give him a false sense of security. That will be your signal to strike.”
“We make a great team.”
“Just don’t forget to stand in front of me the whole time,” he said.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

tags: bad-man, humour, protection

398 likes

#22

“There’s no such thing as winning or losing. There is won and there is lost, there is victory and defeat. There are absolutes. Everything in between is still left to fight for. Serpine will have won only when there is no one left to stand against him. Until then, there is only the struggle, because tides do what tides do–they turn.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

368 likes

#23

“I need a weapon,” Valkyrie muttered.
“You’re an Elemental with a Necromancer ring, trained in
a variety of martial arts by some of the best ﬁghters in the world,” Skulduggery pointed out. “I’m fairly certain that makes you a weapon.”
“I mean a weapon you hold. You have a gun, Tanith has a sword... I want a stick.”
“I’ll buy you a stick for Christmas.”
― Derek Landy, Mortal Coil

tags: christmas, humour, skulduggery, stick, weapon

392 likes

#24

“It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay." - China Sorrows -”
― Derek Landy, Mortal Coil

tags: derek, humor, landy, leaving, skuldugerry-pleasant, wanting

385 likes

#25

“We didn't die,' she said.

Of course not. I'm too clever to die, and you're too pretty.'

I am pretty,' Valkryie said, managing a grin.”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

305 likes

#26

“That's beautiful,' Valkyrie said, looking at it.

Isn't it? This necklace has cost two very fine men their lives. At times, I wear it in tribute to their sacrifice. Other times, I wear it because it goes with this skirt.”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

292 likes

#27

“He looked at her. 'In order to finish, I'll have to have defeated six Infected, Dusk, and Vengeous himself.'

Yeah. So?'

The Infected I can manage.'

She frowned. 'And Vengeous? I mean, you can beat him, right?'

Well,' he said, "I can certainly try. And trying is half the battle.'

What's the other half?'

He shrugged. 'Hitting him more times than he hits me.”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

279 likes

#28

“Valkyrie, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but your friend is most likely dead.”
“Of course he’s dead. He’s a skeleton.”
― Derek Landy, Dark Days

334 likes

#29

“Are you kidding? I jumped off a building -- of course I'm hurt.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

278 likes

#30

“I'm going to photograph every single person to enter and leave this tattoo parlour."
Finbar rolled his eyes. "And they'll hate that, because people who get dragons drawn on their backs are normally so shy about other people noticing them.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

tags: clever, funny, humorous, humour, make-me-laugh, witty

3 likes

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