Alcatraz > Alcatraz's Quotes

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  • #1
    Brandon Sanderson
    “You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.

    It's really funny.”
    ― Brandon Sanderson, Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians
    tags: humor, sarcasm
    2021 likes

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  • #2
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
    tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
    148451 likes

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  • #3
    Frank Zappa
    “So many books, so little time.”
    ― Frank Zappa
    tags: books, humor
    151499 likes

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  • #4
    Mark Twain
    “The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.”
    ― Mark Twain
    tags: aliteracy, attributed-no-source, literacy
    41002 likes

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  • #5
    Bernard M. Baruch
    “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”
    ― Bernard M. Baruch
    tags: ataraxy, be-yourself, confidence, fitting-in, individuality, misattributed-dr-seuss, those-who-matter
    130209 likes

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  • #6
    Dr. Seuss
    “You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
    ― Dr. Seuss
    tags: attributed-no-source, dreams, love, reality, sleep
    127154 likes

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  • #7
    Maurice Switzer
    “It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it.”
    ― Maurice Switzer, Mrs. Goose, Her Book
    tags: misattributed-to-abraham-lincoln, misattributed-to-mark-twain, remaining-silent, wisdom
    44325 likes

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  • #8
    Mark Twain
    “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
    ― Mark Twain
    34466 likes

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  • #9
    Oscar Wilde
    “Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”
    ― Oscar Wilde
    tags: attributed-no-source, enemies, forgiveness, strategy
    81822 likes

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  • #10
    Groucho Marx
    “Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
    ― Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx
    tags: animals, books, dogs, friends, humor
    37987 likes

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  • #11
    Oscar Wilde
    “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
    ― Oscar Wilde
    tags: attributed-no-source, be-yourself, gilbert-perreira, honesty, inspirational, misattributed-oscar-wilde, quote-investigator
    177197 likes

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  • #12
    Marcus Tullius Cicero
    “A room without books is like a body without a soul.”
    ― Marcus Tullius Cicero
    tags: attributed-no-source, books, simile, soul
    135542 likes

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  • #13
    Mahatma Gandhi
    “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
    ― Mahatma Gandhi
    tags: action, change, inspirational, misattributed-to-gandhi, philosophy, wish
    114381 likes

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  • #14
    Steve Jobs
    “Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”
    ― Steve Jobs
    68197 likes

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  • #15
    Bill Watterson
    “You can't just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood.
    What mood is that?
    Last-minute panic.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    tags: procrastination
    2139 likes

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  • #16
    Stephen King
    “Books are the perfect entertainment: no commercials, no batteries, hours of enjoyment for each dollar spent. What I wonder is why everybody doesn't carry a book around for those inevitable dead spots in life.”
    ― Stephen King
    tags: books
    9097 likes

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  • #17
    J.K. Rowling
    “You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!"
    "What are Fred and I? Next door neighbors?”
    ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
    tags: fred-weasley, george-weasley, ron-weasley
    8772 likes

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  • #18
    Oscar Wilde
    “I have nothing to declare except my genius.”
    ― Oscar Wilde
    tags: humor
    2750 likes

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  • #19
    Plato
    “The price good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men.”
    ― Plato
    tags: philosophy
    3041 likes

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  • #20
    Christopher Paolini
    “Books are my friends, my companions. They make me laugh and cry and find meaning in life.”
    ― Christopher Paolini, Eragon
    tags: books, christopher-paolini, eragon, good-reads
    6285 likes

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  • #21
    Nicholas Sparks
    “Our story has three parts: a beginning, a middle, and an end. And although this is the way all stories unfold, I still can't believe that ours didn't go on forever.”
    ― Nicholas Sparks, Dear John
    3590 likes

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  • #22
    J.K. Rowling
    “He was my mum and dad's best friend. He's a convicted murderer, but he's broken out of wizard prison and he's on the run. He likes to keep in touch with me, though...keep up with my news...check if I'm happy...”
    ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
    3437 likes

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  • #23
    Bill Watterson
    “Reality continues to ruin my life.”
    ― Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes
    tags: calvin-and-hobbes, humor, life
    21177 likes

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  • #24
    Bill Watterson
    “Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we speak. Probably so we can think twice.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    tags: calvin-and-hobbes, humor
    3630 likes

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  • #25
    Bill Watterson
    “People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.”
    ― Bill Watterson, The Calvin and Hobbes Tenth Anniversary Book
    tags: idiots, life-humor
    2366 likes

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  • #26
    Bill Watterson
    “CALVIN:
    Isn't it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humor?

    When you think about it, it's weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity. We laugh at nonsense. We like it. We think it's funny.

    Don't you think it's odd that we appreciate absurdity? Why would we develop that way? How does it benefit us?

    HOBBES:
    I suppose if we couldn't laugh at the things that don't make sense, we couldn't react to a lot of life.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    tags: life-humor
    816 likes

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  • #27
    Bill Watterson
    “I wish I had more friends, but people are such jerks. If you can just get most people to leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find even one person you really like, you're lucky. And if that person can also stand you, you're really lucky.”
    ― Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes
    tags: friends
    1681 likes

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  • #28
    Bill Watterson
    “It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    5430 likes

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  • #29
    Bill Watterson
    “I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    tags: calvin-and-hobbes, humor, life
    2723 likes

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  • #30
    Bill Watterson
    “The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    1637 likes



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Tags From Alcatraz’s Quotes

humor
sarcasm
attributed-no-source
human-nature
infinity
philosophy
science
stupidity
universe
books
aliteracy
literacy
ataraxy
be-yourself
confidence
fitting-in
individuality
misattributed-dr-seuss
those-who-matter
dreams
love
reality
sleep
misattributed-to-abraham-lincoln
misattributed-to-mark-twain
remaining-silent
wisdom
enemies
forgiveness
strategy
animals
dogs
friends
gilbert-perreira
honesty
inspirational
misattributed-oscar-wilde
quote-investigator
simile
soul
action
change
misattributed-to-gandhi
wish
procrastination
fred-weasley
george-weasley
ron-weasley
christopher-paolini
eragon
good-reads
calvin-and-hobbes
life
idiots
life-humor