Jissel Toro > Jissel 's Quotes

“Don't be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It's the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates.”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“Charlie Asher: I accidently shagged a monk last night.
Minty Fresh: Sometimes, in times of crisis, that shit cannot be avoided.”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“. . . You seem upset, Charlie. Is something wrong?
Charlie: No, no, I’m okay, I just had to take directions from a mute beaver in a fez to get here, it’s unsettling.”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“. . . And so Charlie Asher . . . led an army of fourteen-inch-tall bundles of animal bits, armed with everything from knitting needles to a spork, into the storm sewers of San Fransciso.”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“Charlie had Sophie strapped to his chest like a terrorist baby bomb when he came down the back steps. She had just gotten to the point where she could hold up her head, so he had strapped her in face-out so she could look around. The way her arms and legs waved around as Charlie walked, she looked as if she was skydiving and using a skinny nerd as a parachute.”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“Only by being prepared for your death can you ever truly live. ”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“When Charlie arrived home from his mother's funeral, he was met at the door by two very large very enthusiastic canines, who , undistracted by keeping watch over Sophie's love hostage, were now able to visit the full measure of their affection and joy upon their returning master. It is generally agreed, and in fact stated in the bylaws of the American Kennel Club, that you have not been truly dog-humped until you have been double-dog-humped by a pair of four-hundred-pouund hounds from hell (Section 5, paragraph 7: Standards of Humping and Ass-dragging). And despite having used an extra-strength antiperspirant that very morning before leaving Sedona, Charlie found that getting poked repeatedly in the armpits by two damp devil-dog dicks was leaving him feeling less than fresh.

Sophie, call them off. Call them off."

The puppies are dancing with Daddy," Sophie giggled. "Dance, Daddy!”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“People who claim that they're evil are usually no worse than the rest of us... It's people who claim that they're good, or any way better than the rest of us, that you have to be wary of.”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led to those who help us most to grow
If we let them and we help them in return.”
― Stephen Schwartz

“One never learns how the witch became wicked, or whether that was the right choice for her~is it ever the right choice? Does the devil ever struggle to be good again, or if so is he not a devil?”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“And girls need cold anger. They need the cold simmer, the ceaseless grudge, the talent to avoid forgiveness, the side stepping of compromise. They need to know when they say something that they will never back down, ever, ever.”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“Some things I cannot change, but 'til I try I'll never know.”
― Stephen Schwartz, Wicked: The Complete Book and Lyrics of the Broadway Musical

“There were more ways to live than the ones given by one's superiors”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“I shall pray for your soul,' promised Nessarose.
I shall wait for your shoes,' Elphie answered.”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“There was much to hate in this world and too much to love.”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“The wickedness of men is that their power breeds stupidity and blindness.”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“You confuse not speaking with not listening.”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“Doubt was much more energy efficient than conviction.”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“Wrong takes an awful long time to be proven, in my experience.
”
― Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

“You forget, darling.
I am the local psychopath.”
― Kelley Armstrong, Bitten

“Urban survival rule 22: Never annoy an armed man.”
― Kelley Armstrong, Bitten

“I called. Why wasn't anyone here?"- Elena
We were here." Clay said. "Around, anyway. You should have left a message."
I did. Two hours ago." - Elena
Well that explains it. I've been out, by the gate all day, waiting for you, and you know Jer never checks the machine."- Clayton
I didn't know how Clay had known I was coming back today when I hadn't left a message. Nor did I question why he'd spent the entire day waiting at the gate. Clay's behavior couldn't be measured by human standard's of normalcy... or by any standards of normalcy at all.
Bitten”
― Kelley Armstrong, Bitten

“Expect Nothing”
― S.D. Perry