Sarah Edwards > Sarah's Quotes

“Stupidity isn't punishable by death. If it was, there would be a hell of a population drop.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Laughing Corpse

“Jesus, are all vampires over two hundred perverts?"
"I am over two hundred," Jean-Claude said.
"I rest my case.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Circus of the Damned

“The heart wants what it wants, Dolp. You don't plan on making your life complicated, it just happens,and you don"t do it on purpose, and you don't do it to hurt people who love you. It just turns out that way sometimes.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Narcissus in Chains

“His dark blue shirt was plastered to his chest, covered with werewolf goop and tears. "Now we both need a bath," I said.
"That can be arranged."
"Please, Jean-Claude, no sexual innuendo until after I'm clean."
"Of course, MA PETITE. It was crude of me tonight. My apologies."
I stared at him. He was being far too nice. Jean-Claude was a lot of things, but nice wasn't one of them.
"If you're up to something, I don't want to know about it. I can't handle any deep, dark plots tonight, okay?"
He smiled and gave a low, sweeping bow, never taking his eyes off me. The way you bow on the judo mat when you're afraid the person may pound you if you look away.
I shook my head. He WAS up to something. Nice to know that not everyone had suddenly become something else. One thing I could always depend on what Jean-Claude. Pain in the ass that he was, he always seemed to be there. Dependable in his own twisted way. Jean-Claude dependable? I must have been more tired than I thought.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Killing Dance

“I was just offered a contract on your life, for enough money to make it worth my while." It was my turn to be quiet.
Did you take it?"
Would I be calling you if I had?"
Maybe," I said. He laughed.
True, but I'm not going to take it."
Why not?"
Friendship."
Try again," I said.
I figure I'll get to kill more people guarding you. If I take the contract, I only get to kill you."
Comforting...”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Killing Dance

“The ratman froze, staring at me. "Why are you laughing?" His voice held just a hint of unease. Good.
I was hoping that the vampires would come for me soon and save me. You've got to admit that's funny.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Guilty Pleasures

“You look wonderful", Jason said.
"No compliments, Jason. I'm uncomfortable enough in the lingerie."
"Then by all means take it off.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Narcissus in Chains

“Asher was a vampire. How much more dangerous could he be with a gun? But I couldn't do it. "Let me test my understanding. Is Asher going to ride in the car with us to the meeting?"
I must to give you directions," Asher said.
Then lean against the Jeep." He frowned at me in an amused, condescending sort of way.
Excuse me?"
I don't care if you're the second coming of the Antichrist, you can't sit behind me in my own car until I know you're not carrying a weapon." Asher smiled briliantly at both of us, flashing fang.
...I could rip you into pieces with my bare hands, and you're worried I have a gun?" He chuckled, a low, skin-prickling sound. "That is so very cute.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Burnt Offerings

“Believe this, Bitch.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Circus of the Damned

“So just tell me what you like on the menu, and we'll negotiate."
All that is required is that you taste what is ordered. You do not have to eat it."
No, no more of this tasting shit. I've gained weight. I never gain weight."
You have gained four pounds, so I am told. Though I have searched diligently for this phantom four pounds and cannot find them. It brings your weight up to a grand total of one hundred and ten pounds, correct?"
That's right."
Oh, ma petite, you are growing gargantuan." I looked at him, and it was not a friendly look.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Burnt Offerings

“He squeezed my shoulder and smiled at me.
I realized that I hadn't kissed him hello, I always kissed him hello. Of course, I was still covered in blood and other bodily fluids, and none of them were his, but he might not understand that that was why I hadn't wanted to get too close. Some of my confusion must have shown on my face, because his smile widened. He turned me around by the shoulders, gave me a little push towards the bathroom, and slapped me on the ass. "Get cleaned up, I'll take care of things here."
"I can't believe that you just did that," I said.
"Did what?" he said, and he was grinning at me.
I could probably count on one hand the number of times Micah had grinned at me. His eyes were sparkling with laughter as if it were all he could do not to let it out. I was happy to see him having a good time, really I was. But I wasn't sure what was funny, and I didn't have the courage to ask. It was probably something that would be at my expense, or something I'd just done that he found cute. I was not cute. Confused, fucked-up, bruised, but not cute. Nathaniel and Damian knew better, but as I passed Gregory, I had to say, "If you touch my ass, I will rip you a new one." I said it as I moved past him, not even pausing.
"You're no fun," he growled.
I looked back just before I turned out of sight of him. "Oh, I'm a lot of fun, just not around you."
He snarled at me. "Bitch."
"Woof, woof," I said, and finally made it into the bathroom.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Incubus Dreams

“I sounded like Horton the Elephant. "A person is a person no matter how small." What the hell was I doing standing in the middle of a cave, in the dark, surrounded by wererats, quoting Dr. Seuss, and trying to kill a one-thousand-year-old vampire?”
― Laurell K. Hamilton

“murder takes presedence over watching my boyfriend strip" -ID, Anita to Nathaniel”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Incubus Dreams

“What's your name?"
Donald."
Hi, Donald, missed you at the wienie roast.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Blue Moon

“It means black kitten," I said with my pulse almost even again.
Ares studied me. "And you're ok with them calling you their black kitten?"
"They're wererats, Ares," I said.
He frowned at me.
"They're not calling me their little black rat. Think it through.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Bullet

“Oh, ma petite, you are growing gargantuan."

I looked at him and it was not a friendly look. "Never tease a woman about her weight, Jean-Claude. At least not an American twentieth-century one."

He Spread his hands wide. "My deepest apologies."

"When you apologize, try not to smile at the same time. It ruins the effect.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Burnt Offerings

“Anita can speak for herself," Richard said.
Jean-Claude's attention flicked back to me. "That is certainly true. But I came to see how the two of you enjoyed the play."
"And pigs fly," I said.
"You don't believe me?"
"Not hardly," I said.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Lunatic Cafe

“Who hit you?"
"Why, so you can go beat him up?"
"One of the fringe benefits of being my human servant is my protection."
"I don't need your protection, Jean-Claude."
"He hurt you."
"And I shoved a gun into his groin and made him tell me everything he knew," I said.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Laughing Corpse

“Would you truly sleep with strangers?" "I don't know, I haven't met the strangers yet.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Skin Trade

“Oh, I'll enjoy myself. I want to make sure you enjoy yourself."
"Why?" I said.
"If you enjoy yourself, then there's a better chance you'll want to be with me again.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Hit List

“There comes a point when you just love someone. Not because they're good, or bad, or anything really. You just love them. It doesn't mean you'll be together forever. It doesn't mean you won't hurt each other. It just mean you love them. Sometimes in spite of who they are, and sometimes because of who they are. And you know that they love you, sometimes because of who you are, and sometimes in spite of it.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Incubus Dreams

“Love sucks. Sometimes it feels good. Sometimes it's just another way to bleed.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Blue Moon

“I knew from the moment I heard you, the moment I saw the gun and realized that this lovely, petit woman was the executioner, that you would never die waiting for me to save you - that you would save yourself.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Narcissus in Chains

“Zebrowski says that if you killed someone else just hide the body, he's not starting over on the paperwork.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Incubus Dreams

“Never trust people who smile constantly. They're either selling something or not very bright.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Burnt Offerings