Jordyn > Jordyn's Quotes

“Were they ready? Did the sun rise in the east and set in the fucking west?”
― L.A. Banks, Cursed to Death

“Maybe they know what I know, that the true way to a man's heart is six inches of metal between his ribs. Sometimes four inches will do the job, but to be really sure, I like to have six.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Narcissus in Chains

“Neither love nor evil conquers all, but evil cheats more.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Cerulean Sins

“My father had taught me to be nice first, because you can always be mean later, but once you've been mean to someone, they won't believe the nice anymore. So be nice, be nice, until it's time to stop being nice, then destroy them.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, A Stroke of Midnight

“If I let you get killed, the other body guards will make fun of me.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton

“Stupidity isn't punishable by death. If it was, there would be a hell of a population drop.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Laughing Corpse

“Zebrowski says that if you killed someone else just hide the body, he's not starting over on the paperwork.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Incubus Dreams

“One thing I've learned about vampires--they keep pulling new rabbits out of their cloaks. Big, fanged, carnivorous bunnies that'll eat your eyeballs if you're not paying attention.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Bloody Bones

“I knew from the moment I heard you, the moment I saw the gun and realized that this lovely, petit woman was the executioner, that you would never die waiting for me to save you - that you would save yourself.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Narcissus in Chains

“I was just offered a contract on your life, for enough money to make it worth my while." It was my turn to be quiet.
Did you take it?"
Would I be calling you if I had?"
Maybe," I said. He laughed.
True, but I'm not going to take it."
Why not?"
Friendship."
Try again," I said.
I figure I'll get to kill more people guarding you. If I take the contract, I only get to kill you."
Comforting...”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, The Killing Dance

“I enjoy my anger, it’s the only hobby I have.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Cerulean Sins

“What did they think I was going to do, steal a body? If I wanted to, I could empty the damn place and get every corpse to play follow the leader. Perhaps that was why I needed watching. Perhaps." --Anita Blake”
― Laurell K. Hamilton

“Accidental sex. He made it sound like I fell down, and there just happened to be an erection in the way.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Incubus Dreams

“What is it about her that is so goddamned special?”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Obsidian Butterfly

“One of my favorite things about hanging out with the monsters is the healing. Straight humans seemed to get killed on me a lot. Monsters survived. Let's hear it for the monsters.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Cerulean Sins

“I try to be a good cop. I try to be a good little soldier and follow orders up to a point. But in the end I’m not really a cop, or a soldier. I am a legally sanctioned murderer. I am the Executioner.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, Skin Trade

“Given that you probably used to wear . . . velvet bloomers, lace, high heels, and a ponytail, yeah—I guess you have changed a little,” I said, and gave a slight smile in hopes of easing the depressing mood.Eli actually grinned. “That look was hot back then.” He held his arms out. “Velvet coat with tails to match. Yeah, ruffles, too. I was badass.”
― Elle Jasper, Afterlight

“Poe, you wiener, get your ass over here!"
"Shut Up! I ain't a wiener!"
Broken, adolescent male laughter echoed through the night air, and if I hadn't been so damned mad, I'd have laughed too. Something about hearing a group of idiotic pubescent fifteen-year-old boys say wiener just cracked me up.”
― Elle Jasper, Afterlight

“You didn't kill him. He would have killed you, but you didn't kill him."
"So? He was stupid. If I killed everyone who was stupid, I wouldn't have time to sleep.”
― Tamora Pierce, In the Hand of the Goddess

“Every now and then I like to do as I'm told, just to confuse people.”
― Tamora Pierce, Melting Stones

“A good friend will help you up when you fall. A best friend will laugh and try to trip you again.
- I'm not sure”
― Tamora Pierce, The Immortals

“I suppose he could have changed," Neal said dryly. "I myself have noticed my growing resemblance to a daffodil." The other pages snorted.

Kel eyed her friend. "You do look yellow around the edges," she told him, her face quite serious. "I hadn’t wanted to bring it up."

"We daffodils like to have things brought up," Neal said, slinging an arm around her shoulders. "It reminds us of spring.”
― Tamora Pierce (Page) , Page

“I think it's fair rude to make him a tree and not know what kind he is.”
― Tamora Pierce, Wolf-Speaker

“When people say a knight's job is all glory, I laugh and laugh and laugh. Often I can stop laughing before they edge away and talk about soothing drinks.”
― Tamora Pierce, Squire

“I'd like to find whoever taught the Stump that extra work builds character and push him down the stairs," Neal told Kel at lunch.”
― Tamora Pierce, First Test

“You look as scary as a buttered muffin.”
― Tamora Pierce

“Why do I get the feeling that if you give me a hard time, I'll tell all of our year-mates your family nickname is Meathead?”
― Tamora Pierce

“I've said it before and I'll say it again, my lord. You are an evil man.”
― Tamora Pierce, Squire

“Does your ma know you're this silly?" she demanded tartly.
He nodded, comically sad. "The few gray hairs she has on her head are my doing. But" — with an exaggerated change of mood — "I send her plenty of money, so she can pay to have them dyed!"
"I hope she beat you as a child," Onua grumbled.”
― Tamora Pierce, Wild Magic

“WE do try to eat," Raoul called back to her [Kel]. I go all faint if I don't get fed regularly. Only think of the disgrace to the King's Own if I fell from the saddle."
"But there was that time in Fanwood," a voice behind them said.
"That wedding in Tameran," added the blonde Sergeant Osbern, riding a horse-length behind Kel.
"Don't forget when what's-his-name, with the army, retired," yelled a third.
"Silence, insubordinate curs!" cried Raoul. "Do not sully my new squire's ears with your profane tales!"
"Even if they're TRUE?" That was Dom. It seemed Neal wasn't the only family member versed in irony.”
― Tamora Pierce, Squire