Tim > Tim's Quotes

“The president of the United States has claimed, on more than one occasion, to be in dialogue with God. If he said that he was talking to God through his hairdryer, this would precipitate a national emergency. I fail to see how the addition of a hairdryer makes the claim more ridiculous or offensive.”
― Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

“In fact, "atheism" is a term that should not even exist. No one ever needs to identify himself as a "non-astrologer" or a "non-alchemist." We do not have words for people who doubt that Elvis is still alive or that aliens have traversed the galaxy only to molest ranchers and their cattle. Atheism is nothing more than the noises reasonable people make in the presence of unjustified religious beliefs.”
― Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

“If you think that it would be impossible to improve upon the Ten Commandments as a statement of morality, you really owe it to yourself to read some other scriptures. Once again, we need look no further than the Jains: Mahavira, the Jain patriarch, surpassed the morality of the Bible with a single sentence: 'Do not injure, abuse, oppress, enslave, insult, torment, torture, or kill any creature or living being.' Imagine how different our world might be if the Bible contained this as its central precept. Christians have abused, oppressed, enslaved, insulted, tormented, tortured, and killed people in the name of God for centuries, on the basis of a theologically defensible reading of the Bible.”
― Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

“Tell a devout Christian that his wife is cheating on him, or that frozen yogurt can make a man invisible, and he is likely to require as much evidence as anyone else, and to be persuaded only to the extent that you give it. Tell him that the book he keeps by his bed was written by an invisible deity who will punish him with fire for eternity if he fails to accept its every incredible claim about the universe, and he seems to require no evidence what so ever.”
― Sam Harris, The End of Faith: Religion, Terror, and the Future of Reason

“We have a choice. We have two options as human beings. We have a choice between conversation and war. That's it. Conversation and violence. And faith is a conversation stopper.”
― Sam Harris

“It is time that we admitted that faith is nothing more than the license religious people give one another to keep believing when reasons fail.”
― Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

“It is time we admitted, from kings and presidents on down, that there is no evidence that any of our books was authored by the Creator of the universe. The Bible, it seems certain, was the work of sand-strewn men and women who thought the earth was flat and for whom a wheelbarrow would have been a breathtaking example of emerging technology. To rely on such a document as the basis for our worldview-however heroic the efforts of redactors- is to repudiate two thousand years of civilizing insights that the human mind has only just begun to inscribe upon itself through secular politics and scientific culture. We will see that the greatest problem confronting civilization is not merely religious extremism: rather, it is the larger set of cultural and intellectual accommodations we have made to faith itself.”
― Sam Harris, The End of Faith: Religion, Terror, and the Future of Reason

“The moral truth here is obvious: anyone who feels that the interests of a blastocyst just might supersede the interests of a child with a spinal cord injury has had his moral sense blinded by religious metaphysics.”
― Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

“Holy shit," I breathed. "Hellhounds."
"Harry," Michael said sternly. "You know I hate it when you swear."
"You're right. Sorry. Holy shit," I breathed, "heckhounds.”
― Jim Butcher, Grave Peril

“You don't take your cat with you to go bird shopping. Not because the cat isn't polite, but because he's a cat.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“I don't have anything against God. Far from it. But I don't understand Him. And I don't trust a lot of the people that go around claiming that they're working in His best interests. Faeries and vampires and whatnot -- those I can fathom. Even demons. Sometimes, even the Fallen. I can understand why they do what they do. But I don't understand God. I don't understand how he could see the way people treat one another, and not chalk up the whole human race as a bad idea”
― Jim Butcher

“You must be Warden Ramirez."
This is the part where I got nervous. Ramirez loved women. Ramirez never shut up about women. Well, he never shut up about anything in general, but he'd go on and on about various conquests and feats of sexual athleticism and—
"A virgin?" Lara blurted. Lara blurted. She turned her head to me, grey eyes several shades paler than they had been, and very wide. "Really, Harry, I'm not sure what to say. Is he a present?”
― Jim Butcher, White Night

“There aren't any magical words, really. Words just hold the magic.”
― Jim Butcher, Grave Peril

“He had hard, steady eyes, and all the comforting, reassuring charm of a dental drill. - Harry Dresden describing Morgan”
― Jim Butcher, Turn Coat

“You suck. You suck diseased moose wang, Marcone.”
― Jim Butcher

“You need to know where to go," Sanya said.

"Yes."

"And you are going to consult four large pizzas for guidance."

"Yes," I said.

The big man frowned for a moment. Then he said, "There is, I think, humor here which does not translate well from English into sanity.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“This creature serves you?" Sanya asked.

"This one and about a hundred smaller ones. And five times that many part-timers I can call in once in awhile." I thought about it. "It isn't so much that they serve me as that we have a business arrangement that we all like. They help me out from time to time. I furnish them with regular pizza."

"Which they...love," Sanya said.

Toot spun in a dizzy, delighted circle on one heel, and fell onto his back with perfectly unself-conscious enthusiasm, his tummy sticking out as far as it could. He lay there for a moment, making happy, gurgling sounds.

"Well," I said. "Yes."

Sanya's eyes danced, though his face was sober. "You are a drug dealer. To tiny faeries. Shame.”
― jim butcher, Changes

“And from the perspective of those in need, that extra quarter of a million bucks your material person spent on the prestige addition for his house looks like an awful lot of lifesaving food and medicine that could have existed if the jerk with the big house in the suburbs hadn't blown it all to artificially inflate his sociogeographic penis.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Thomas barked out a laugh. "There are seven of us against the Red King and his thirteen most powerful nobles, and it's going well?"

Mouse sneezed.

"Eight," Thomas corrected himself. He rolled his eyes and said, "And the psycho death faerie makes it nine."

"It is like movie," Sanya said, nodding. "Dibs on Legolas.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“I am somewhat proud of this," Mab's cold voice said. "To be sure, the White Christ never suffered so long or so terribly as did this traitor. Three days on a tree. Hardly enough time for a prelude. When it came to visiting agony, the Romans were hobbyists.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Susan smiled at me, giving Molly the Female Once-Over - a process by which one woman creates a detailed profile of another woman based upon about a million subtle details of clothing, jewelry, makeup, and body type, and then decides how much of a social threat she might be. Men have a parallel process, but it's binary: Does he have beer? If yes, will he share with me?”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Mac folded his arms on the bar and looked at me intently and said, in a resonant baritone, "You've got to be very careful, Harry."

I looked at him, shocked. He'd...used grammar.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Better safe than exsanguinated.”
― Jim Butcher, Death Masks

“There were quick footsteps beside me, and then Molly pressed her back to mine. "You take that side!" she said. "I'll take this one!"

DJ Molly C lifted both of her wands and turned the battle chaos to eleven.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“Why?" I demanded of her. "Why bring the child into this? Why not just come straight to me?"

"Does it matter at this point?"

I shrugged. "Not really. I'm curious."

She stared at me for a moment and then she smiled. "You don't know."

I eyed her warily. "Don't know what?"

"Dear boy," she said. "This was never about you."

I scowled. "I don't understand."

"Obviously," Arianna said, and gave me a stunning smile. "Die confused.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“So," he said. "Mab."

I grunted vaguely in reply.

"You hit that," Sanya said.”
― Jim Butcher, Changes

“About thirty feet from the door, Molly abruptly stopped in her tracks and said, "Harry."

I paused and looked back at her.

Her eyes were wide. She said, "I sense..."

I narrowed my eyes. "Say it. You know you want to say it."

"It is not a disturbance in the Force, she said, her voice half-exasperated.”
― Jim Butcher, Cold Days

“Okay," I said to Karrin. "Let's move."

"Uh," she asked, without turning her head. "move where?"

"The island," I said.

"Harry, this is a motorcycle."

"It'll work," I said. "Look at it."

Karrin jerked as she noted the appearance of the Harley. "You want me to drive into the lake."

"You have to admit," I said, "it isn't the craziest thing I've ever asked you to do. It isn't even the craziest thing I've asked you to do tonight.”
― Jim Butcher, Cold Days

“I'd been to the island on most weekends up until I got shot, and Thomas had often come with me. We'd used some fresh lumber, some material salvaged from the ruined town, and some pontoons made from plastic sheathing and old tractor-tire inner tubes to construct a floating walkway to serve as a dock, anchored to the old pilings that had once supported a much larger structure. Upon completion, I had dubbed it the Whatsup Dock, and Thomas had chucked me twenty feet out into the lake, thus proving his utter lack of appreciation for reference-orientated humour.

(And then I'd thrown him forty feet out with magic, once I got dry. Because come on, he's my brother. It was the only thing to do.)”
― Jim Butcher, Cold Days

“Merlin had, according to legend, created the White Council of Wizards from the chaos of the fall of the Roman Empire. He plunged into the flames of the burning Library of Alexandria to save the most critical texts, helped engineer the Catholic Church as a vessel to preserve knowledge and culture during Europe's Dark Ages, and leapt tall cathedrals in a single bound.”
― Jim Butcher, Cold Days