Natalie > Natalie's Quotes

“If complete and utter chaos was lightning, then he'd be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armour and shouting 'All gods are bastards!”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“Sometimes I think a man could wander across the disc all his life and not see everything there is to see,' said Twoflower. 'And now it seems there are lots of other worlds as well. When I think I might die without seeing a hundredth of all there is to see it makes me feel,' he paused, then added, 'well, humble, I suppose. And very angry, of course.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“Everyone has gods. You just don't think they're gods.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“He wondered what kind of life it would be, having to keep swimming all the time to stay exactly in the same place. Pretty similar to his own, he decided.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“My personal theory is that he has a very firm grasp upon reality, it's simply not a reality the rest of us have ever met before.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“An alternative, favored by those of a religious persuasion, was that A’Tuin was crawling from the Birthplace to the Time of Mating, as were all the stars in the sky which were, obviously, also carried by giant turtles. When they arrived they would briefly and passionately mate, for the first and only time, and from that fiery union new turtles would be born to carry a new pattern of worlds. This was known as the Big Bang hypothesis.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“Those who sought her never found her, yet she was known to come to the aid of those in greatest need. And, then again, sometimes she didn’t. She was like that. She didn’t like the clicking of rosaries, but was attracted to the sound of dice. No man knew what She looked like, although there were many times when a man who was gambling his life on the turn of the cards would pick up the hand he had been dealt and stare Her full in the face. Of course, sometimes he didn’t. Among all the gods she was at one and the same time the most courted and the most cursed.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“Usually he didn’t bother the gods, and he hoped the gods wouldn’t bother him. Life was quite complicated enough.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“He reflected briefly that someone up there was watching over him. 'Thanks a lot,' he said bitterly.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“There was the faintest of sounds, as of a gnat yawning.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Color of Magic

“Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Steal five dollars and you're a common thief. Steal thousands and you're either the government or a hero.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“What kind of man would put a known criminal in charge of a major branch of government? Apart from, say, the average voter.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“I commend my soul to any god that can find it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Look, he said to his imagination, if this is how you're going to behave, I shan't bring you again.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Do you understand what I'm saying?"
shouted Moist. "You can't just go around killing people!"
"Why Not? You Do." The golem lowered his arm.
"What?" snapped Moist. "I do not! Who told you that?"
"I Worked It Out. You Have Killed Two Point Three Three Eight People," said the golem calmly.
"I have never laid a finger on anyone in my life, Mr Pump. I may be–– all the things you know I am, but I am not a killer! I have never so much as drawn a sword!"
"No, You Have Not. But You Have Stolen, Embezzled, Defrauded And Swindled Without Discrimination, Mr Lipvig. You Have Ruined Businesses And Destroyed Jobs. When Banks Fail, It Is Seldom Bankers Who Starve. Your Actions Have Taken Money From Those Who Had Little Enough To Begin With. In A Myriad Small Ways You Have Hastened The Deaths Of Many. You Do Not Know Them. You Did Not See Them Bleed. But You Snatched Bread From Their Mouths And Tore Clothes From Their Backs. For Sport, Mr Lipvig. For Sport. For The Joy Of The Game.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“You know how to pray, don’t you? Just put your hands together and hope.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“See a pin and pick it up, and, all day long, you'll have a pin.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“But, in truth, it had not exactly been gold, or even the promise of gold, but more like the fantasy of gold, the fairy dream that the gold is there, at the end of the rainbow, and will continue to be there forever - provided, naturally, that you don't go and look. This is known as finance.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“If you kept changing the way people saw the world, you ended up changing the way you saw yourself.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“They say that the prospect of being hanged in the morning concentrates a man's mind wonderfully; unfortunately, what the mind inevitably concentrates on is that, in the morning, it will be in a body that is going to be hanged.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Welcome to fear, said Moist to himself. It's hope, turned inside out. You know it can't go wrong, you're sure it can't go wrong...But it might.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“You did what you were told or you didn't get paid, and if things went wrong it wasn't your problem. It was the fault of whatever idiot has accepted this message for sending in the first place. No one cared about you, and everyone at headquarters was an idiot. It wasn't your fault, no one listened to you. Headquarters had even started an Employee of the Month scheme to show how much they cared. That was how much they didn't care.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“ALWAYS REMEMBER that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Never promise to do the possible. Anyone could do the possible. You should promise to do the impossible, because sometimes the impossible was possible, if you could find the right way, and at least you could often extend the limits of the possible. And if you failed, well, it had been impossible.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“But…but you can’t treat religion as a sort of buffet, can you? I mean, you can’t say yes please, I’ll have some of the Celestial Paradise and a helping of the Divine Plan but go easy on the kneeling and none of the Prohibition of Images, they give me wind. Its table d´hôte or nothing, otherwise…well, it would be silly.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“I wonder if it's like this for mountain climbers, he thought. You climb bigger and bigger mountains and you know that one day one of them is going to be just that bit too steep. But you go on doing it, because it’s so-o good when you breathe the air up there. And you know you'll die falling.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Raise the stakes! Always push your luck because no one else would push it for you.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Every organization needs at least one person who knows what's going on, and why it's happening, and who's doing it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal