Deb J > Deb's Quotes

“I don’t like to judge people.

I love it.

Writing people completely off was liberating”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“I hadn’t seen Jennifer in a week. Absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder. Whoever said that was a damn fool. Absence makes the heart suicidal. Take my heart for example. It hadn’t stopped hurling itself against my ribs—at odd times, day or night—for a week.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“I changed my mind.”

“You changed—”

“My. Mind.” I stopped short and faced him, placing my hands on my hips. “It’s like underpants, Jethro.”

“Dirty and dark?” He smirked.

“No.” I scowled at his facial expression. “A mind is like underpants because people change them all the time.”

“But you don’t.”

“I do change my underpants all the time, Jethro. And, for the record, I think it’s mighty rude of you to assume I don’t.”

He almost rolled his eyes, but caught the urge. “I meant your mind, Cletus. You don’t change your mind.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“You’re my beginning, middle, and end.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“That’s right. You seize that woman, Cletus. You make her yours. And then after,” still grinning, Duane dropped his hand on my shoulder and gave me a little shake, “you give that woman your sausage.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“You want to know what you are to me? Fine. You’re my beginning, middle, and end.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Crap.

She’s going to cry.

This was a situation that required neutralizing. I placed my hand over hers and gave her a squeeze.

“There, there.” Fruit cake. “Calm down—”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“You’ll know one day, Cletus. You’ll discover what it’s like to find the other part of yourself. You’ll know it’s her, only her, always her. Maybe not right away, but eventually you’ll know. She’ll be your beginning, middle, and end. And your intentions won’t matter. Love brings its own intentions, and all other plans, hopes, and dreams fade to insignificance in the face of love.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Dammit, Billy. You had one job. One. Job.

I moved my glare to my brother. “May I have a word?”

“Now?” he asked, looking and sounding almost delighted. Of note, delighted for Billy was imperturbably stoic for everyone else.

“Yes. Now.” I bared my teeth in a grin.

Billy’s eyes moved between mine and I cursed his fastidious grooming. He’d taken extra care with the beard trimmer this afternoon. He also smelled like a profligate, cologne, and unrequited infatuation.

My older brother turned and whispered something into Jennifer’s ear. I stiffened, barely restraining the urge to grab him by his shirt collar and yank him down the hall.

But I didn’t. Instead I made a list of all his most treasured possessions for . . . reasons.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Cletus sneered. “You are the opposite of boastful, and your humbleness verges on infuriating.” “Gee, thanks.” I rolled my eyes. “Look, all I’m saying is that if a person is great at something, she shouldn’t have to pretend she's not, and she shouldn’t have to downplay her hard work. There's nothing wrong with humility or modesty, Jenn. But—for heaven's sake—take credit for being a badass.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“That’s right. I’m looking for an escape. Drew is out there. And—oh God—Cletus, I’m the worst. I’m so awkward, my awkward is embarrassed by my awkward.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Do you want to tell me what happened? Why were those bikers chasing you?” Jessica’s gaze bounced between us.

“They were upset I switched their tampons with Depends.” Cletus sounded so serious and reasonable, I almost believed him. And I’d been there.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Though I’d stayed up the previous night until Billy arrived home, he was irritatingly circumspect with details. I swear, getting information out of him sometimes was harder than getting blood out of a turnip.

I showered quickly, intent on making it to Donner’s Bakery for whatever Jenn had cooking, and ask her directly how the date had gone, i.e. did I need to maim Billy? Or had he been a gentleman? Or, even if he’d been a gentleman, did I still need to maim him?”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“I’m a firm believer that if a person needs a hug, you give that person a hug. So many times I’ve been in a situation where I needed a hug, and instead had to settle for a good cry on a pillow at the end of the day.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“I hated being early. It was like having to wait for the same thing twice.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Do you honestly think God would make a creature as lovely and talented and good as your sister, and then make the way she looks something sinful? Something to be ashamed of? No. He wouldn’t. If anything, your sister—her face, her body, her mind, and her heart—give glory to Him. And she shouldn’t be hidden. You don’t hide something that remarkable away from the world, like your parents have done, like you want to do. That’s the true sin.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“How do normal people learn how to kiss without frightening off good kissers?”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Kevin Arthur liked cutting hair. I reckoned his desire was a good one, considering he was a barber. However, Kevin always wanted to cut more inches off my hair than requested. We argued every time I came into his shop.

I told him my hair needed weight, otherwise it stood straight up and out, and my head—which was larger than average already, likely to accommodate my massive brain—resembled a cantaloupe on a toothpick, with cantaloupes being the least esteemed of all fruit.

He maintained I needed a short cut, with the sides clipped close, and the top longer and thinned. He said the thickness of my hair was responsible for its propensity to misbehave. He said the cut would bring all the girls to my yard.

This was doubtful. First of all, I didn’t want girls in my yard. I didn’t want anyone in my yard. My yard was fine just as it was: self-maintained.

Secondly, I’d never been popular with the women folk. Women, or at least the women I knew, didn’t much enjoy my lack of willingness to deal with bullshit. For that matter, most men I knew didn’t enjoy this about me either.

Bullshit was the adult version of Santa Claus. For reasons I’ll never comprehend,the general population seemed to enjoy wallowing, spouting, and believing in bullshit.

But back to my barber”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“I tried my best to pretend unkind words were actually just erroneously expressed compliments, as it just made everything nicer for everybody.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“More recently, my father has been impressed with how Billy basically started at the bottom of Payton Mills and has worked himself up to South East Region Vice President.”

Cletus frowned. “Is that his title?”

“My father thinks so. And he’s certain Billy wants to run for state senate. Both my parents like the idea of having a son-in-law in politics. I think that’s why they like Jackson so much. I know he has plans to run for office.”

“Jackson would make a great politician.”

“I thought you didn’t like Jackson?”

“I don’t. Saying someone would make a great politician is like saying someone would make a great serial killer. It’s not a compliment.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“Soon we're both frowning hard at the paperwork. "Middle name?" Noah says. "Does Gideon even have a middle name?"
"I don't know"
Noah turns to me and says, "Do you have a middle name?" his glare implying that, if I do, this whole thing is somehow my fault.
"I...have no idea."
"Primary language spoken at home." Noah makes a face. "What does this mean? Our primary language? Gideon's? That's sort of why we're here..."
"Um, it's under family, so I'm guessing ours?"
"Well..." Noah lowers his pen. The paperwork has defeated him. "What's our primary language?"
"English? ASL? Physical affection?"
"Food?" Noah says.
"Food's a good guess."
He picks up the pen. "I'm writing food, comma passive aggressive."
"Good call.”
― Hannah Moskowitz, Invincible Summer

“Don't ever let anyone tell you that college is for smart people. College eats smart people alive.”
― Hannah Moskowitz, Invincible Summer

“Camus-boy, you're always going to be the same you, just older. It's not like there's a moment when you wake up and go, Shit, I'm grown-up, I don't feel like myself anymore.'

I don't tell him, but this is the scariest fucking thing I've ever heard in my life. Being grown-up should feel like a big transition. It can't be something that, despite my best efforts, I've been drifting closer and closer to every summer. It needs to be a shock. I need to know at what point to stop holding on. And that moment will suck, and probably every moment after that will suck, but at least I'll know that everything that came before really was valid. I really was young and innocent. I wasn't fooling myself.”
― Hannah Moskowitz, Invincible Summer

“I'd do almost anything for you. I think I'd kill for you. But I'm not going to comfort you while you cry in my arms over another man. - Gage Travis”
― Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy

“Dating is like trying to make a meal out of leftovers. Some leftovers actually get better when they've had a little time to mature. But others should be thrown out right away, No matter how you try to warm them up, they're never as good as when they were new.”
― Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy

“If loneliness was a choice, what was the other option? To settle for second-best and try to be happy with that? And was that fair to the person you settled for?”
― Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy

“Most men don't seem to get that telling a pissed-off woman to calm down is like throwing gunpowder on a fire.”

~ Liberty Jones”
― Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy

“Darlin'...I know what you look like when you've been kissed.”
― Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy

“A sixty - eight, he wants you to go down on him but he won't return the favor. It would be sixty-nine but he owes you one.”
― Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy

“Alone-sex didn't count. It's like the difference between thinking to yourself or having a good conversation with someone----the pleasure is in the exchange."

-Liberty Jones”
― Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy