Ask Paulo Coelho - Tuesday, April 2nd! discussion

Sir, I would like to add a question to the gypsy of Accra. How come all the decisions I make/I've made were such bad decisions? Why does fate likes to play with me? Whenever I came to a corner, roadturn in my life, I had to make a decision. left or right. Each and every turn happened to be the worst choice.
I do not understand..
I am not complaining. As a muslim, I totally believe that God knows it all. Fate is in his hands and only Allah can know what is in the future.. But.. I get to be more and more reluctant in making decisions. I prefer sitting on my hands and wait, till the situation solves itself, instead of taking the risk of decisions..
That is it.
Thank you for all your wonderful books, I've got most of them. I am wishing you best of health and happiness.
Ipek

Before choosing, perhaps try writing down the question. What could happen if I.......
Some people have an issue that allows them to see point A and then to see point Z, but not anything in between nor to be able to problem solve along the way to keep moving along. Let me ask you, when you come to a street, do you take a deep breath and say, "God knows all!", close your eyes and step out into the street with a fake smile on your face? NO! Of course not. Life is the same way. I suppose, you could also choose to sit down on the side of the road and refuse an attempt to cross? I want to tease you a little and ask if you are a Libra. :)

Ipek wrote: "Sir, I would like to add a question to the gypsy of Accra. How come all the decisions I make/I've made were such bad decisions? Why does fate likes to play with me? Whenever I came to a corner, roa..."

Ipek,
I know that this question isn't for me, but is there a chance that you just do not know yourself enough? Or maybe you go against your intuition without noticing? I didn't mean it in any offending way, so please forgive me if you feel uncomfortable with my reply.
By the way, it is also possible that what seemed like the "wrong" decisions at a time, might somehow turn out right in the future.
So don't give up on yourself. As far as I remember, no Paulo Coelho's characters ever did. :-)

Elisa wrote: "Before choosing, perhaps try writing down the question. What could happen if I.......
Some people have an issue that allows them to see point A and then to see point Z, but not anything in between..."

Elisa, thank you for writing. I usually sit on the side and wait for the other side come at me. I know it is cowardly. I am too afraid of making a decision, I usually let the chance to slip.. I have to change myself.. I am an Aries, btw.. :)))

Sophia wrote: "Ipek wrote: "Sir, I would like to add a question to the gypsy of Accra. How come all the decisions I make/I've made were such bad decisions? Why does fate likes to play with me? Whenever I came to ..."

Sophia you are giving me hope. thanks a lot. yes you are right, that "wrong" decisions I made once had made me this very person I am today...
I feel that I got to make a huge decision in my life/career soon. I am so afraid of making a wrong decision; in leaving the job I am earning my life and sending my kids to good schools (and which I hate eternally) and live in poverty. I will die of shame..
yes, the situation is this.
and I know, no-one can know the future..
and I still choose to sit on my chair and refuse to make any move...
I hate this.
thanks for writing,
Ipek

I look at decisions very simply. The decision I made then (yesterday,last week,ten years ago, etc...) was right for me at that time. Then things change as I go along in life. Where I am or what I am doing is a result of that decision. Don't look to the past and blame yourself for something you did and think the woulda', coulda' shoulda'. Now think what can I do and actively make a decisions. Life is about decisions. If you are making choices and decisions, you are missing life.

Pam, you don't get it I think.
Look at this : I had a little house. I sold it. Next thing I saw was a big contractor bought many houses on the street. they paid twice the amount I get to the new owner.
I always make BAD decisions. Or, whenever I make one, it seems that the other option ends much better.

Contrary to what many may think, this world is not only about money.
So what if you didn't get as much as the contractors. It seems that you are comparing your outcomes to others' accomplishments, which is never a good idea because you will often feel that you are behind on something, or that someone else got a better deal.
Are there additional reasons (besides money) that made you regret selling your house?
Was it really that bad of a decision? Think about the house itself, and not the money involved. It is possible that, after considering the pros and cons of such a decision, along with its alternatives, you may realize that some of your decisions were not completely wrong.
This relates to what I said in my previous comment regarding knowing yourself (and understanding your reasoning patterns) enough.

p.s. If you'd like me to to elaborate outside of forum, you are welcome to send me a private message.
:-)

Sophia wrote: "Contrary to what many may think, this world is not only about money.
So what if you didn't get as much as the contractors. It seems that you are comparing your outcomes to others' accomplishments, ..."

no, I don't have any additional reasons. I do not regret either. I wanted to sell it, it was a spare one, I just want to sell it away, and I sold it.
Aaaand, there it is, the price went sky high..

not only the money issues, you name it..
Each and Every decision as far as I remember, ended up bad.
I do not know how.
The line I choose to wait in the market will be the slowest.
Murphy loves me I guess.
lets buy the same phones, mine would make problems sooner..

I added you as a friend if that is allright with you.

thanks for encouraging me! I really appreciate.
I am not depressed or anything. I got used to this and living with this condition.
I am ok.

Pam wrote: "I look at decisions very simply. The decision I made then (yesterday,last week,ten years ago, etc...) was right for me at that time. Then things change as I go along in life. Where I am or what I a..."

Ipek wrote: "Pam, you don't get it I think.
Look at this : I had a little house. I sold it. Next thing I saw was a big contractor bought many houses on the street. they paid twice the amount I get to the new o..."

Ipek wrote: "Sophia wrote: "Contrary to what many may think, this world is not only about money.
So what if you didn't get as much as the contractors. It seems that you are comparing your outcomes to others' ac..."

Ipek wrote: "Pam, you don't get it I think.
Look at this : I had a little house. I sold it. Next thing I saw was a big contractor bought many houses on the street. they paid twice the amount I get to the new o..."

Ipek wrote: "Pam, you don't get it I think.
Look at this : I had a little house. I sold it. Next thing I saw was a big contractor bought many houses on the street. they paid twice the amount I get to the new o..."

Pam wrote: "Pam wrote: "I look at decisions very simply. The decision I made then (yesterday,last week,ten years ago, etc...) was right for me at that time. Then things change as I go along in life. Where I am..."

You are right. I don't get it. I'm sorry if I offended you or made you feel badly. I was simply stating the way I look at my world. Mine is not yours,however. I do hope you find some resolution and peace. I will think of you often.
Pam