Proud Of It! discussion

Honey, I know how you feel. It is much easier to help and love others than to help and love yourself. Especially if society and/ or those closest to you do not accept you as you are.

I went through this for years. (And sometimes find myself slipping back into it.) but I found something that helped me. I'm not really into those guru-type self-help things, but I found that whenever I stopped in front of a mirror, rather than thinking negative things, I would find something about me that I liked. It was really hard at first. Then I would make myself look at myself in the morning and at night and tell myself one thing that made me awesome. Not necessarily about the way I looked, but about WHO I am as a person. It took time (about six month) but eventually I began to see the good in me. I began to like myself, and eventually to love myself.

Give it a try. Maybe it will help. And if you can't think of a good thing about yourself at first, start with this. "Heidi knows that I rock, and care about lots of other people, without any thought to my own needs or concerns. I am a giving person, and that is something worth loving!"

Go get 'em tiger!

You too hon. Keep your chin up.

Have you tried seeing a counselor? If you don't find that what I suggested helps, it might be something deeper. I know my son was just (tentatively) diagnosed with bi-polar. Despite our constant praise, if we gave even one note of constructive criticism he would become belligerent and angry. Having a chemical imbalance, nothing worked until he was medicated. Now he is happy and mostly stable.

Mind you, I am not saying that you are bipolar, I'm simply using this as an example of things outside the norm of self-image that might effect it. It is a good example for me, because I have experienced it. There are so many other possibilities such as depression, body dismorphic disorder, and a dozen others that positive self-talk cannot help; but a qualified counselor can. (And again, I'm not suggesting it is any of these either. But if you've tried the self-talk and it doesn't help, it is certainly worth looking into what else might be contributing to the issue.)

Thoughts of love and happiness from me to you.

Hey can you create a topic where everyone has to say five things they like about themselves?

Jessy wrote: "It kinda makes it ironic how I'm so supportive of all of you, when in truth I don't believe in myself.

I don't really like myself.

I don't look in the mirror and smile as much.

I don't feel good..."

Jessy...I feel the same way, a lot. All I can do to help myself is to look in the mirror, and say "You are beautiful." Then say everything you like about yourself.
I also write the stuff I dislike on a paper, then I fold it and destroy it. Gone. I just got rid of it all.

I hate the way I look, the way I act.
I hate how I chew my fingle-nails.
I hate how ugly my hair is.
I hate my fat body.
I hate my stupidness.
I hate my forgetfullness.
I hate my fear of water.
I hate my teeth.
I hate my actions.
I hate my thoughts.
I hate my obessions.
I hate me.
I hate them.
I hate us.
I hate love.
I hate hate.
I hate her.
I hate the world.
I hate everything about me.
I hate God for makeing like this.
I hate my parents.
I hate myself.
I
Hate
ME

thanks love

Jessy wrote: "@Kassi, that's a good thing to do! I think I'll try that."

Yup. No problem. It helps me...sometimes. So does recycling...(smashing cans helps with my anger issues)

Jessy wrote: "It kinda makes it ironic how I'm so supportive of all of you, when in truth I don't believe in myself."

Umm, I don't think it is ironic at all. I know I feel that way sometimes too. I think everybody does at one point or another. I used to meditate a lot, and still do whenever I am feeling stressed out. During meditation, I generally reflect on philosophy. It's helped me come to accept myself as I am.

I really like this quote...

“Live a good life. If there are gods and they are just, then they will not care how devout you have been, but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by. If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them. If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones.”

― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Anyway, I hope it helps a little.

I wish to help you.. But I don't have much counselling words.. I can't make someone feel good anyhow.. :(

And this part of me is the worst...

Just hope You feel better.. Love ya

You're welcome dear! anytime>_<

Why is it that for a year I try to forget my past and then now almost everything from the past 13 years decides to come rushing back to my mind, so that I go into a flashback and end up thinking mostly of 3rd grade, 4th grade, 1st grade, 2nd grade, kindergarten and the guy I had a crush on then, whose name I've long forgotten and I don't remember what he looked like or where he even ended up for High School. I even remember when I first met my bestie, which as weird as that may seem, to me it seems like we've known eachother forever, but I remember pre-school and before then even, bits and pieces, but how could i remember all of it if I wanted to forget the mistakes I've made?