Writerpedia discussion

Hey everyone, I am about to publish my first novel, Hindsight, but I wanted to see if I could get your expert advice on the back cover copy. Which of the two would you be more likely to buy? If you've got any further suggestions or edits, I'd be happy to hear them.

Option 1:

Shirley O'Shea is a construction worker in New Jersey with a funny name and a not-quite-so-funny past. When a man named Isaac offers him money to deliver an antique watch to an old friend, Shirley can't say "no". He needs the cash--his sister, Haley, is in college and his Aunt, Winnie, hasn't been feeling well. They are the only family he has left, and he's doing all he can to take care of them. But there's more to the delivery than Shirley knows, and, in one instant, the life he has been trying so hard to rebuild is blown to hell.

The blast drives Shirley into his family's history--a past filled with violence, shame, and loss. Shirley’s left to figure out what he’s gotten himself into, who he can trust and to what lengths he’s willing to go to protect those he loves.

But Shirley has a few skeletons of his own banging on the closet doors, and the hinges are starting to come off.

Option 2:

“I am hurtling eight stories to the pavement. There’s a bullet in my left shoulder and another chewing through my lung. I am going to die.” -Shirley O'Shea

Shirley O’Shea was putting the pieces of his life back together in Camden, New Jersey before a bomb blast blew it all to hell. It had been three years since he got out of prison. He’d been trying to bury his violent past and his family’s history of shame and loss. Now he’s learning that there is more to that family history than he ever knew. It starts with the connections that his grandfather had to the IRA and a man named Isaac. Shirley’s left to figure out what he’s gotten himself into, who he can trust and what lengths he’s willing to go to in order to keep his family safe.

But Shirley has a few skeletons of his own banging on the closet doors, and the hinges are starting to come off.

Congrat's on publishing your novel!

I like the second option better.

Best,
Renae

Thanks Renae.