Ruth Group discussion

The prologue talks about what it was like to wear a burqa in the heat. All I could think about was how hot it is outside today and how stifling it would be to be covered in cloth without air conditioning. Zoya understands that the burqa is "to hide their identities as women, to make them feel so ashamed of their sex that they were afraid to show one inch of their bodies." What would that be like!

We learn in Chapter one that Zoya was born in 1978 which is the year I was married so I know that if Zoya is alive today she is about 35. My elder daughter was born the following year so as I read the book I contrast what Zoya says with the experience of my daughter growing up- what a difference. I think it is also good to remember that Paul in his letter to the Galatians wrote, "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." While some places in the bible seem to promote traditional gender roles, right from the beginning of Christianity the message was equality of gender in God's eyes. This book helps me see what a radical idea this was and in some places still is.

I agree! Zoya is only a few years younger than I am. When I think back to what I was doing at various stages of Zoya's life it's hard to believe the differences. Her story isn't "history"- it's happening right now!

On page 31 Zoya reacts to the stories her Grandmother tells her about Afghanistan's history by saying, "They make it impossible for many historians to decide whether the country, which is Moslem but not Arab, belongs more to Central Asia, the Indian subcontinent, or the Middle East." We think of America as a "melting pot" but the mixing and clashing of cultures goes on everywhere all the time. Too often this results in violence, as it does in this story. Can people and cultures interact constructively without one dominating or seeking to conquer the other? What do you think? How does this fit in to what Jesus says about the Kingdom of God?

Chapter 3 talks about Zoya's early education and relationship with her family. On page 43 She writes, "For the first time I realized that people were being killed for their ideas." What a powerful realization, especially for an elementary school age child. As you think about your own childhood can you think of times when people hurt each other because of their differences in ideas?

Chapter 4 tells the Grandmother's story of her marriage as what we would term "domestic abuse." The people in general and the religious leaders in particular supported the idea that it was her lot in life and obedience to God meant unconditional obedience to husbands even to the point of beatings. Is it any different in America?

I'm wondering- who is enjoying this book? The first time I read it I couldn't put it down. Maybe it's because Zoya's life is so different from the life I lead. I don't know. Why do you like it?

I like how frank and forthright she is about her experiences and observations. Also identify with her desire to make her life matter.