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First Chapter Contest!!! (YAY!)
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Isobelle
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Sep 24, 2013 05:39PM
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Hi Isobelle!What a great idea. Really gets ones writing out there.
I'm in!! :)
https://www.goodreads.com/story/show/...
Thanks! Alexa
I'm entered I just haven't posted it yet, but I will soon!
Mod
Ok I'll post one I just started a few days ago. Um mine is kinda short though so ill just post it straight up.
Mod
Mod
Right! I forgot I'm such a lazy forgetful one! Ill do it as soon as I have time (my excus for right now is I don't have the story on this device you'll have to wait until I can get access to my iPad around 12 please be patient)
CHAPTER 1Have you ever wondered about life; your future and your past? What if I said I could show you both?
The fair is so beautiful; the sun is overhead overlooking each child as they anxiously await their turn on the rides. Every ones happiness and laughter reminded me of when I was young, from an infant through to teenager, when I would go to the fair seeking a good time. There’s a father holding his sons hand, walking around without a care in the world. A group of teenage girls sit on a wooden bench showing off to the boys behind the fairy floss stand. They’re all creating memories; the fair is full of them. My memories linger in the shadows, but they won’t be forgotten, my childhood memories are the only good memories I have, when I could be proud of my father.
I imagine my memory to be like a closet, with memories piling up in there every day. The newer ones at the top still in plain sight, then there are the memories that are better of being forgotten, like those of my childhood. They are like those items that stay at the back of the closet collecting dust until they decay past recognition. The memories of my father before the war I keep in a glass jar, one I polish every day. I will never let the glass jar collect dust; it’s all I have of my childhood now. However, what I remember of my father after the war, when he was nothing but a stranger, seem to never be forgotten. They are like food in a plastic container you can never open to let out, though you try every day, keeping the outside nice and clean, only to let the contents fester over time.
My father was always nothing but a good man, very polite indeed. He was the type of person who would help an old lady cross the road or hold her groceries. Even after the war this was so, but he was not just completely with us. He was still there for everyone, everyone but us. After the war he was a changed man, it was a change though he would have been better off without. He lost his charm and loving spirit and was angry all the time. He didn’t care about his family anymore; we were nothing but acquaintances, extras in his life. My mother would always say in a comforting tone to try and explain this situation to a 9 year old girl “war is a dangerous place Beatrix. It changes people, takes them bit by bit until there is nothing left of them. We lost him Beatrix and we aren’t going to find him.” It took me quite a few years to come to terms with losing my father, the one we had all known and loved. To comfort myself I always go back to my glass jar, polish and savour it.
My father was a special man in more ways than one. Not only was he once a beloved father he also had a special gift. Though I must say this special gift of his could one day get him into a lot of trouble, so he kept it secret. Whilst holding an object belonging to a person, he knew all their secrets. He was no phony though. He knew everything about everyone. That didn’t make him a good enough father though. Nothing could be kept a secret from him but as his daughter grew older and the war stole him from us he couldn’t understand her. One of my favourite things I inherited from my father was his gift. I myself can’t tell peoples secrets I have a much stronger gift. With one look at someone I know there past and future. This gift can get me into a lot of trouble, even more than my dad, and it will.
Mod
Chapter 1: The New Boy
Leila woke up to the singing of her cell phone.
"Hello?" she answered, her voice slurred with sleep.
"Are you not up yet, girl?" Her best friend, Makayla, practically yelled into the phone, "Get up! Get ready! Get dressed! It's the first day of high school!"
An hour later, after showering and drying and dressing and brushing and primping, Leila arrived at school. Melview High School was directly connected to Melview Middle School, and mostly everybody who was in the 9th grade had been there since they were kids. This is going to be a piece of cake, Leila thought.
"Ah! You're here, finally!" Makayla ran up to her and hugged her, "You won't believe it! I checked and we have all our classes together and everything!" They walked into the school auditorium - a big room crowded with high schoolers and a podium at the front - chatting to old friends. Taylor and Savannah, their perpetual followers, walking close behind. Makayla only had time to roll her eyes before they pounced.
"Hey girls, aren't you excited! Today's the day our life really begins!" they babbled on, but Leila stopped listening. They were always trying to impress her. Soon the rest of their clique joined them, and they went to take their seats.
"Ehem!" An unfamiliar young woman with short, choppy black hair standing on the podium tried to get the students' attention. Where's the normal principal, Mr. Muellers? Leila wondered.
"Hello, I'm Ms. Stellers," the woman continued, "Unfortunately, Mr. Muellers retired at the end of last year, and I'm his replacement. Of course, new school, new rules and also, new principal, new rules. I'm going to be making a few changes around here, nothing drastic of course, just a few.... adjustments, and I want you all to know..." Leila lost focus, her eyes drifting around the room and taking in the familiar faces, - and the one that wasn't? She stopped scanning, backtracked and found it. From what she could see, it was a dark haired boy that she was certain she had never seen before in her life.
"Hey, Micky, who's that boy?" She nudged her friend,
"Who?"
"That one over there! The one who's different."
"I don't see any "different" one, Leila."
"It's the one right-
"Excuse me - you two girls right in the middle there!" Ms. Stellers yelled, and everyone turned around to stare right at Leila and Makayla.
After a few moments of embarrassing silence, the principal spoke again. "I'd appreciate it if you would actually listen while I'm speaking. Thank you. Now, where was I... Oh yes let's welcome the five new students to our school." The principal read out five names, and the bearer of each name stood up, but the dark-haired boy didn't, Leila was too busy being embarrassed to notice though.
"Oh my god, was that embarrassing or was that embarrassing! I nearly died! That Ms. Stellers seems like she's going to be a huge pain in the ass." Makayla exclaimed as they filed out of the auditorium, "I'd appreciate it if you actually listened when I'm talking!" she imitated in a squeaky voice. They both burst out laughing.
"I almost wish Mr. Muellers hadn't retired!" Leila said. "Almost."
Makayla giggled. "God, was he terrible!" As the two girls and their friends walked down the hall to their first class, everybody else moved to the sides to make space for them.
"Hey, Leah! Hey, Makayla!" a voice chimed, Leila searched for the source, annoyed that it got her name wrong. It was the new boy.
"My name's Lei-la, new boy!" Leah corrected angrily," And what the hell are you doing in my school?" The boy's round face paled and he seemed to be searching for words. His mouth flapped uselessly, clearly intimidated, Leila was pleased, but that pleasure was interrupted by a sharp tug pulling her past the boy.
"What was that Leila? Do you want to get us embarrassed again?" Makayla snapped at her. Confused, it was her turn to be speechless, "Calling Max a new boy? He's been at our school since Pre-k!"
"What, no! I swear he's new! And he got my name wrong!" Leila protested.
"Hon, I know it's upsetting when the school renowned hottie's name is mispronounced, but you know as well as I do that no new kids ever come to our school," Makayla said sweetly and gently took her shoulder, "Come on, let's get to class."
Leila was pretty much back to normal when class started.
"Hello class, my name's Mr. Carwin and I'll be your teacher this year while we study the exciting topic of American History!" The teacher, an old man known in the school for his chocolate addiction, presented himself to the class. Leila felt herself relax, completely comforted by the normalcy of this class.
The class was in its full swing of half listening to Mr. Carwin's droning voice when there was a knock on the door. The new boy - Max, Makayla had called him - walked in. Leila clenched her fists.
"Sorry I'm late, sir," said Max.
"No problem, Max, have a seat." Even Mr. Carwin seemed to know who this Max was! What the hell was going on?
Throughout the whole class - and the rest of the day - Leila examined anybody and everybody for signs that could prove this new boy did not belong, but found absolutely nothing. Frustrated and confused, Leila led her group to their table, only to find that it was occupied by a couple of the new kids.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Leila said angrily - interrupting whatever fascinating discussion about a homework assignment the nerds were having.
"Um... eating l-lunch?" A braver boy answered.
"Well, you better go eat it somewhere else!" Makayla responded - coming up beside Leila.
"Yeah, this is our table!" Andrea added. The kids looked unsure, mumbling something or other. Leila realized they were stalling, so she leaned over them intimidatingly.
"Get out, now." She whispered fiercely. The kids got out so fast it was like they disappeared. Leila felt a rush of success, as she watched them run, spreading the word of what just happened to their friends. Then she turned around,
"Ok, girls, let's eat!" She said cheerily.
They were deep into a discussion on Marissa's new look - seriously, who told her blue streaks were a good idea? - when Makayla abruptly changed the subject:
"So, are we going to talk about what happened with Max today or what?"
"What?" Leila replied. This is it, she thought. She's going to accuse me of being crazy.
"Oh, come on! I know you haven't forgotten! He forgot your name! We have to do something." Leila breathed a sigh of relief. Revenge was something she understood.
"So, what's it gonna be?" Makayla continued, "Complete ostracizing, or public humiliation or maybe even... dirty gossip?"
"Why don't we just..." Leila's mind whirred as she tried to think of a lesser punishment. "Do something smaller? It is the beginning of the school, after all." Makayla looked confused for a few seconds, then she grinned slyly.
"Does somebody have a crush?" she asked playfully,
"No! Ew!" Leila responded, scandalized, "Why would I? He forgot my name, remember?" He never knew my name, she silently corrected.
"True..." Makayla replied, "So, is this another one of your pity on the lower beings kind of things? I swear, you're going to open up a charity next!"
Leila felt her misgivings fade away. What did she owe him, anyways?
The next day passed normally, and as long as Leila avoided seeing or even thinking about Max, she was fine. She was scared that if she saw him again she'd slip up and call him New Boy, and then everybody would know she was crazy, or at the very least had some weird kind of amnesia. But when the final bell rang, she was in good spirits.
"Hey Micky, we going to your house tonight?" Leila called when she saw her friend.
"Aw, no. I forgot to tell you, My family's doing this back to school celebratory dinner. There's no missing it and no friends allowed, sorry." Makayla said apologetically, "See you Monday?"
"Sure, no problem!" Leila replied, waving goodbye to Makayla. She pulled out her phone and called her mom, voicemail.
"Hey Mom, change of plans; I can't study with Makayla today. Could you pick me up at the school?" she found a bench near the front of school, and sat down to wait.
She was still waiting ten minutes later when someone sat down next to her, she didn't look up.
"Hey," it was Max. Act cool, act cool! Leila thought.
"Hey Max," Her voice was completely even, though she was panicking inside.
"You remember me?" Max said surprised.
"Of course I remember you! You've been at the school since Pre-K!" Max relaxed and gave a big smile. Leila took this opportunity to search her memory for him. He was medium height with floppy black hair, tan skin, a boyishly round face, and eyes so brown they almost looked black, he looked kind of Greek in a way. She may have imagined it, but it seemed like he had this differentness about him that separated him from everyone else she knew. Suddenly, Max shifted awkwardly. Realizing she had been staring, she looked away embarrassed, and he got up to leave.
"Uh, I guess, I'll see you on Monday then, Leah."
"Oh my god! It's Leila, New Boy!" her hands flew to her mouth - she had given away her secret. Max turned and fixed her with a piercing dark-eyed stare,
"You don't remember me, do you?" he said finally. Leila struggled to think up an appropriate response, but drew a blank. Max nodded, answering his own question, and walked away. Leila sighed and checked her phone. Her mom obviously wasn't coming, so she would have a long walk home to thinking about her impending social doom.
"Hey! Mom? I'm home!" Leila called into the empty hallway.
"Hi Leelee!" a little blonde figure rushed into Leila,
"Hey Olive," Leila said to her younger sister, "you've been home alone?"
"Ya, Momma dropped me off from school, but had to go to a work thingy."
"She knows I don't like it when she leaves you alone!" Leila exclaimed angrily.
"I was ok, I watched TV!" Olivia replied,
"I still don't like it." Leila grumbled, "Did you eat anything yet?"
"No, not yet." Her sister replied, following her into the kitchen.
"Here, I'll make us dinner." Leila started preparing something, and her sister sat down to watch her.
"What did you do today, Leelee?"
"Actually, I've got a bit of a problem, wanna help me out?"
"Sure!" the little girl replied eagerly
"Well, a boy in my school accidentally found out a big secret I was keeping, and he's going to tell the world! What do I do?" Leila tried to keep her voice light for her sister, but it bordered on hysteria. Olivia thought a while, she could be very mature when she wanted to be.
"You can't stop him from telling...but could you find a way to make sure no one believes him?" Leila stopped.
"Olive, you're a genius! I'll be right back!" She yelled back to Olivia as she ran out the room.
"What about dinner?" the younger girl called back, but Leila didn't hear, she was already dialing Makayla's number.
Leila woke up to the singing of her cell phone.
"Hello?" she answered, her voice slurred with sleep.
"Are you not up yet, girl?" Her best friend, Makayla, practically yelled into the phone, "Get up! Get ready! Get dressed! It's the first day of high school!"
An hour later, after showering and drying and dressing and brushing and primping, Leila arrived at school. Melview High School was directly connected to Melview Middle School, and mostly everybody who was in the 9th grade had been there since they were kids. This is going to be a piece of cake, Leila thought.
"Ah! You're here, finally!" Makayla ran up to her and hugged her, "You won't believe it! I checked and we have all our classes together and everything!" They walked into the school auditorium - a big room crowded with high schoolers and a podium at the front - chatting to old friends. Taylor and Savannah, their perpetual followers, walking close behind. Makayla only had time to roll her eyes before they pounced.
"Hey girls, aren't you excited! Today's the day our life really begins!" they babbled on, but Leila stopped listening. They were always trying to impress her. Soon the rest of their clique joined them, and they went to take their seats.
"Ehem!" An unfamiliar young woman with short, choppy black hair standing on the podium tried to get the students' attention. Where's the normal principal, Mr. Muellers? Leila wondered.
"Hello, I'm Ms. Stellers," the woman continued, "Unfortunately, Mr. Muellers retired at the end of last year, and I'm his replacement. Of course, new school, new rules and also, new principal, new rules. I'm going to be making a few changes around here, nothing drastic of course, just a few.... adjustments, and I want you all to know..." Leila lost focus, her eyes drifting around the room and taking in the familiar faces, - and the one that wasn't? She stopped scanning, backtracked and found it. From what she could see, it was a dark haired boy that she was certain she had never seen before in her life.
"Hey, Micky, who's that boy?" She nudged her friend,
"Who?"
"That one over there! The one who's different."
"I don't see any "different" one, Leila."
"It's the one right-
"Excuse me - you two girls right in the middle there!" Ms. Stellers yelled, and everyone turned around to stare right at Leila and Makayla.
After a few moments of embarrassing silence, the principal spoke again. "I'd appreciate it if you would actually listen while I'm speaking. Thank you. Now, where was I... Oh yes let's welcome the five new students to our school." The principal read out five names, and the bearer of each name stood up, but the dark-haired boy didn't, Leila was too busy being embarrassed to notice though.
"Oh my god, was that embarrassing or was that embarrassing! I nearly died! That Ms. Stellers seems like she's going to be a huge pain in the ass." Makayla exclaimed as they filed out of the auditorium, "I'd appreciate it if you actually listened when I'm talking!" she imitated in a squeaky voice. They both burst out laughing.
"I almost wish Mr. Muellers hadn't retired!" Leila said. "Almost."
Makayla giggled. "God, was he terrible!" As the two girls and their friends walked down the hall to their first class, everybody else moved to the sides to make space for them.
"Hey, Leah! Hey, Makayla!" a voice chimed, Leila searched for the source, annoyed that it got her name wrong. It was the new boy.
"My name's Lei-la, new boy!" Leah corrected angrily," And what the hell are you doing in my school?" The boy's round face paled and he seemed to be searching for words. His mouth flapped uselessly, clearly intimidated, Leila was pleased, but that pleasure was interrupted by a sharp tug pulling her past the boy.
"What was that Leila? Do you want to get us embarrassed again?" Makayla snapped at her. Confused, it was her turn to be speechless, "Calling Max a new boy? He's been at our school since Pre-k!"
"What, no! I swear he's new! And he got my name wrong!" Leila protested.
"Hon, I know it's upsetting when the school renowned hottie's name is mispronounced, but you know as well as I do that no new kids ever come to our school," Makayla said sweetly and gently took her shoulder, "Come on, let's get to class."
Leila was pretty much back to normal when class started.
"Hello class, my name's Mr. Carwin and I'll be your teacher this year while we study the exciting topic of American History!" The teacher, an old man known in the school for his chocolate addiction, presented himself to the class. Leila felt herself relax, completely comforted by the normalcy of this class.
The class was in its full swing of half listening to Mr. Carwin's droning voice when there was a knock on the door. The new boy - Max, Makayla had called him - walked in. Leila clenched her fists.
"Sorry I'm late, sir," said Max.
"No problem, Max, have a seat." Even Mr. Carwin seemed to know who this Max was! What the hell was going on?
Throughout the whole class - and the rest of the day - Leila examined anybody and everybody for signs that could prove this new boy did not belong, but found absolutely nothing. Frustrated and confused, Leila led her group to their table, only to find that it was occupied by a couple of the new kids.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Leila said angrily - interrupting whatever fascinating discussion about a homework assignment the nerds were having.
"Um... eating l-lunch?" A braver boy answered.
"Well, you better go eat it somewhere else!" Makayla responded - coming up beside Leila.
"Yeah, this is our table!" Andrea added. The kids looked unsure, mumbling something or other. Leila realized they were stalling, so she leaned over them intimidatingly.
"Get out, now." She whispered fiercely. The kids got out so fast it was like they disappeared. Leila felt a rush of success, as she watched them run, spreading the word of what just happened to their friends. Then she turned around,
"Ok, girls, let's eat!" She said cheerily.
They were deep into a discussion on Marissa's new look - seriously, who told her blue streaks were a good idea? - when Makayla abruptly changed the subject:
"So, are we going to talk about what happened with Max today or what?"
"What?" Leila replied. This is it, she thought. She's going to accuse me of being crazy.
"Oh, come on! I know you haven't forgotten! He forgot your name! We have to do something." Leila breathed a sigh of relief. Revenge was something she understood.
"So, what's it gonna be?" Makayla continued, "Complete ostracizing, or public humiliation or maybe even... dirty gossip?"
"Why don't we just..." Leila's mind whirred as she tried to think of a lesser punishment. "Do something smaller? It is the beginning of the school, after all." Makayla looked confused for a few seconds, then she grinned slyly.
"Does somebody have a crush?" she asked playfully,
"No! Ew!" Leila responded, scandalized, "Why would I? He forgot my name, remember?" He never knew my name, she silently corrected.
"True..." Makayla replied, "So, is this another one of your pity on the lower beings kind of things? I swear, you're going to open up a charity next!"
Leila felt her misgivings fade away. What did she owe him, anyways?
The next day passed normally, and as long as Leila avoided seeing or even thinking about Max, she was fine. She was scared that if she saw him again she'd slip up and call him New Boy, and then everybody would know she was crazy, or at the very least had some weird kind of amnesia. But when the final bell rang, she was in good spirits.
"Hey Micky, we going to your house tonight?" Leila called when she saw her friend.
"Aw, no. I forgot to tell you, My family's doing this back to school celebratory dinner. There's no missing it and no friends allowed, sorry." Makayla said apologetically, "See you Monday?"
"Sure, no problem!" Leila replied, waving goodbye to Makayla. She pulled out her phone and called her mom, voicemail.
"Hey Mom, change of plans; I can't study with Makayla today. Could you pick me up at the school?" she found a bench near the front of school, and sat down to wait.
She was still waiting ten minutes later when someone sat down next to her, she didn't look up.
"Hey," it was Max. Act cool, act cool! Leila thought.
"Hey Max," Her voice was completely even, though she was panicking inside.
"You remember me?" Max said surprised.
"Of course I remember you! You've been at the school since Pre-K!" Max relaxed and gave a big smile. Leila took this opportunity to search her memory for him. He was medium height with floppy black hair, tan skin, a boyishly round face, and eyes so brown they almost looked black, he looked kind of Greek in a way. She may have imagined it, but it seemed like he had this differentness about him that separated him from everyone else she knew. Suddenly, Max shifted awkwardly. Realizing she had been staring, she looked away embarrassed, and he got up to leave.
"Uh, I guess, I'll see you on Monday then, Leah."
"Oh my god! It's Leila, New Boy!" her hands flew to her mouth - she had given away her secret. Max turned and fixed her with a piercing dark-eyed stare,
"You don't remember me, do you?" he said finally. Leila struggled to think up an appropriate response, but drew a blank. Max nodded, answering his own question, and walked away. Leila sighed and checked her phone. Her mom obviously wasn't coming, so she would have a long walk home to thinking about her impending social doom.
"Hey! Mom? I'm home!" Leila called into the empty hallway.
"Hi Leelee!" a little blonde figure rushed into Leila,
"Hey Olive," Leila said to her younger sister, "you've been home alone?"
"Ya, Momma dropped me off from school, but had to go to a work thingy."
"She knows I don't like it when she leaves you alone!" Leila exclaimed angrily.
"I was ok, I watched TV!" Olivia replied,
"I still don't like it." Leila grumbled, "Did you eat anything yet?"
"No, not yet." Her sister replied, following her into the kitchen.
"Here, I'll make us dinner." Leila started preparing something, and her sister sat down to watch her.
"What did you do today, Leelee?"
"Actually, I've got a bit of a problem, wanna help me out?"
"Sure!" the little girl replied eagerly
"Well, a boy in my school accidentally found out a big secret I was keeping, and he's going to tell the world! What do I do?" Leila tried to keep her voice light for her sister, but it bordered on hysteria. Olivia thought a while, she could be very mature when she wanted to be.
"You can't stop him from telling...but could you find a way to make sure no one believes him?" Leila stopped.
"Olive, you're a genius! I'll be right back!" She yelled back to Olivia as she ran out the room.
"What about dinner?" the younger girl called back, but Leila didn't hear, she was already dialing Makayla's number.
Mod
Mod
Hey I can't read Alexa's story the link is not working...
but then there's just the two of us...
I think Isobelle should just choose then.
isn't that the whole point of the judge?
Yep we do, all you need to do is decide between us.
Mod
Okay.
Mod
DRUMROLL PLEASE!!
...
(The winner judges the next contest, remember!)
...
:-)
The winner is: ALISON!
There are a few minor spelling and grammar errors, and the narration goes a bit quickly, but it's a good start. Maybe add a bit more description, though.
It was really close, and I love both beginnings; I can't wait to read the next part.
So, if you're judging a contest you can always post our next chapter in the next contest, even if it's not the first/second... chapter.
yay! Thank u! Ok so for the next one I judge?
