Fans of Interracial Romance discussion

How many sex scenes do you expect in the books you read? I am writing one right now that only has one full fledged sex scene and i'm not sure it needs more. Do you guys notice if a story lacks sex? Do you tend to focus more on the dynamics between the main characters? I never really thought about this until I started writing fiction. As a reader I like to get lost in the story and I guess I tend to focus on the relationship.. I'm curious to see your opinions. Thanks!

As many as it needs. There's just no easy answer to that. It depends on the subgenre, the characters, the mood or tone of the book, the situation, even the author.

What are you hoping to make your readers feel when they finish this book, Jasmine?

I want the readers to get caught up in the depth of feelings between the two characters and I want them to get lost in their story. I want readers to feel like they read a really good story of love between two people. Hopefully I achieved that with this book. The story is wrapping up and I realized I only have one big sex scene. I could put one at the end but I don't think it's necessary. I just want to make sure I am giving readers what they want. Thanks for answering me Andrea!

Jasmine wrote: "How many sex scenes do you expect in the books you read? I am writing one right now that only has one full fledged sex scene and i'm not sure it needs more. Do you guys notice if a story lacks sex?..."

It also depends on the length , is it being tagged romance, or erotica. If it's tagged erotica, low sex, and over 75 pages might be irritated. Are there other sexually charged moments besides the one full fledged sex scene?

I do get irritated if a romance book lacks sex but that's me. As others said it depends on the page count and sub genre.

It is over 150 pages and is MMA romance, not erotica. There are other sexually charged moments in the book, but as I am finishing the book it is making sense to have another sex scene near the end. I like to make sure the sex scenes make sense for the story and I don't like to throw them in just to have them there. Thanks for the feedback!

Hello Jasmine-
I agree with the previous comments. I also like a lot of sex in my romances, but only if it makes sense. I once reviewed a romance where the sex scene took up the majority of the text. It sucked. I might suggest looking at Delaney Diamond's" Worth Waiting For." There is no big sex scene. The author does her job and the reader is becomes involved with the story, which is what you are striving for. Good Luck and can you tell me the title of your text and when it becomes available?

Thanks for that suggestion Kimberly! The title of the book is The Billionaire's Son and it should be available on Amazon tomorrow depending upon how long it takes them to publish it. Once it's there, I will add it here.

I do not care for sex scenes. I do not care for detailed sex scenes. I tend to skip over love scenes. I rather they be closed scenes as in you know what they are about to do and before you know it they are in another scene. I love good tension. I like to know why the couple is hooking up.

Thanks for the comment, Arch. It is really helpful to know what different readers like. As a reader, I like both good tension and a good sex scene. As a writer, I am finding that most of my readers seem to prefer some sort of steamy sex scene but I really enjoy delving into the relationship.

Jasmine wrote: "Thanks for that suggestion Kimberly! The title of the book is The Billionaire's Son and it should be available on Amazon tomorrow depending upon how long it takes them to publish it. Once it's ther..."

What does your editor say about the sex scenes? That is an important step in the process.

Yeah...depends on your audience and depends on the story you want to tell. I'm with Arch on this one, I'd rather read clean stories, but nowadays it's hard to find that with adult romances, so if it makes sense, 1 scene is fine.

This is why authors need to write the story they want to tell b/c you will never please all who will read your book. I'm not saying that to be flippant or saying getting feedback is bad b/c it's not.

Personally I want hot steamy sex w/ a well thought out plot that includes romance. I don't read clean romance. Personally I want a trigger warning if the book is clean. This would help readers who also only want to read no sex books.

I'm worried my comment sounded bitchy. Not my intention and I apologize if it came off that way. I think it's cool ur publishing ur 1st book. As other readers said its about knowing ur audience.

At 150 pages 2 sex scenes w/ sexual tension would work for me

I am a writer and I am firm believer that a writer should never write for others and always write for themselves. I do. I love writing tension and about dangerous bad boys.

Several. But, as others have said, it depends on the length of the book.

When I first started reading IR, I was initially shocked at the graphic sex scenes. Now I expect them (real life) and I notice when a story doesn't have them, has too many or are too tame or only has one or two scenes. Sometimes, it can be difficult to strike a balance.

I just read a book that weirdly had a semi-graphic sex scene at the end of it. It seemed out of place -- and the end of the book felt unfinished -- as if the writer got tired and said screw it -- I'm done!

Another book (Rock Star IR story) was a clean romance which I didn't realize until I noticed the author didn't type out the "f" word, instead it appeared as f****** This was definitely a first for me. When I read their bio, it said that they write only clean romance stories. If the story had been labeled "clean" I would have avoided this book -- it was too tame with religious overtones, given the genre.

I do think beta readers can be really helpful in providing feedback on soon-to-be published books. Come back and let us know when your book is available on Amazon. Congrats on getting your book (nearly) finished.

I haven't purposely read a low heat love story (like old school Harlequin heat level) in decades. I do prefer the higher heat ratings. They don't have be erotica, but like my love to feel like fire. At the same time I expect a good book to have a story that could stand on it's own, if you removed the sex. Does that make sense?

I agree with Arch. it's cool to keep your readers in mind, but as an author you have to write the story you write. A few of my readers wanted me to write about a more docile heroine. All of my ladies are strong and sassy in their own way. I like a challenge, so I did. It was one of the hardest things to do. A few readers liked her while the rest were like - oh no. Lesson learned, write your story. No one else's. I like detailed sex scenes. if its too many or too little I might notice, bug besides that - 3-4 is just enough.

Arch wrote: "I am a writer and I am firm believer that a writer should never write for others and always write for themselves. I do. I love writing tension and about dangerous bad boys."

I agree about the inclusion of tension and dangerous bad boys. IMO, the perfect romance includes a lot of tension, seduction by the Alpha and/or Beta, and then the bang and the boom... If the author is gifted, passionate, and wants to deliver a great product to their readers, 9 times out of 10, the end product will more than likely, end up being rather good..

Anino, I live a messy hero that loves his woman.

Since this is a writing question, I moved it to that folder.

I like sex scenes so long as they fit the story and they aren't kinky or with an edge of sadomasochism. I'm not an fan or erotica personally. I don't care much for that edge of punishment or when the hero is using sex to punish or control the heroine. I think the bedroom is intimate and it should be a place of earned trust and I like that to show in the romance books I read.

I don't think every love story needs sex. I've read plenty where I was perfectly satisfied without a love scene.

I think one sex scene can work if it accomplishes what you've built up over the course of the book. Without good chemistry outside of the bedroom, sex scenes don't work.

I feel that sex and especially graphic/erotic sex is overused in romance novels nowadays and writers are pressed to add sex when they might not want to so they can sell more books. That's the way the market is running.

I like my books to have at least one or two per chapter. I read one book where the first sex scene was at chapter 20 and it wasn't a good one I almost stopped reading the book.

Just depends on how well written they are. I do prefer several per book depending on length. That's the length of the book not the length of the male character....lol

Kathy wrote: "Just depends on how well written they are. I do prefer several per book depending on length. That's the length of the book not the length of the male character....lol"

This is very true. All of us have some preset book rules about our reading enjoyment criteria, that are all easily breakable when the writing blows us away. That's how new favorites are born.

i agree with whats already been said. there isn't a specific, yes-no answer or a rule where sex scenes shouldn't exceed X amount. its whatever flows with the story and fits and makes sense to the development and idea of the romance. so write away.

i just realized that some of my all-time favorite romances happen to be chick-lit type books without sex scenes. this is just my personal opinion and experience, but when writing romances excluding sex scenes, i think authors invest more time and effort to creating deep connections and are forced to focus on convincing relationship-building and strong characterization. i've always gone back to those stories for the little but memorable gestures, the endearing moments in the most casual interactions, the poignant words spoken in passing. i've found that those bits and pieces of a romance story tend to stay with me the most. but that speaks more to the author's quality of writing than anything.

so my answer: whatever works for your story.

I can deal with any amount of sex scenes except zero. :)

Seriously, I don't mind a lot of sex scenes but like any scene, it has to be crucial to the story. I want to know the thoughts and feelings of the characters, what's motivating them and what they are afraid of. My favorite sex scenes are from writers who put thought into getting us into the charaters' heads.

I tend to overwrite sex scenes and mine go on and on, then I go back and edit to make sure I'm only writing what moves the story forward.

I struggle with sex scenes in my writing. I try to include them, because I know so many readers feel like romance needs to have them.

Adrienne wrote: "I struggle with sex scenes in my writing. I try to include them, because I know so many readers feel like romance needs to have them."

Are you struggling because it doesn't fit the story/your storytelling style? It's one thing if it's something you're weak at writing and you want to improve, with the added bonus that the readers want the scenes too, and another where you shoehorn the scenes in because a market survey says it must be so....

...but I know I'm in the minority here about not caring about sex scenes in my romances.

Pygmy wrote: "Adrienne wrote: "I struggle with sex scenes in my writing. I try to include them, because I know so many readers feel like romance needs to have them."

Are you struggling because it doesn't fit th..."

Pygmy,
I struggle because I do not feel comfortable writing them. My focus is usually on the emotional aspects of intimacy, and I realize that I need to work on my descriptions of physical acts. Some authors are really good at writing steamy scenes with graphic language. I am better at writing emotional scenes with abstract language. I feel like I should be able to do both, so i am currently working on it. I try to write outside of my comfort zone so I can grow as a writer. Does that make sense?

Yup, that makes sense. But if you really don't like writing them, I hope you don't feel pressured into forcing it!

More sex, and more sex. I find it hard to stay engaged if there is no fire. I'm not a fan of expletive free books. That's not my life so I can't relate.

I'm reviving this thread because I'm in the middle of a delimma regarding the topic. I'm working on my fourth book and all prior three books had lots of steamy sex. This one is more of a YA (all adults, in college) but the actual sex doesn't happen until the second half for two reasons:

1. The h falls for someone else first, because of how the H has been portrayed. A major theme of the book is first impressions and how they can be wrong and the secret history between the H and the first boy she starts dating. And H's eventual ability to win her over.

2. She is a virgin, so it doesn't make sense for her to slip and have willy nilly sex before the spectacular first time with the H.

That said, once the sex happens (and it's spectacular if I do say so myself), it happens A LOT in the second half of the book.

The first half is not boring IMO, There is a good fight scene, funny side characters, secrets galore, suspense and character development. and there is a lot of sexual tension and a few "Self satisfaction" scenes with lots of imagery.

TL;DR: Current book ~75K words probably won't have actual> intercourse until ~30K, but LOTS of scenes after, and a plenty of sexual tension and "use of the hand" before hand.

Just how many people would I turn off, on both sides of the fence?

Not me. But I guess it depends on how much use of the 'hand' scenes are there. But genuinely I wouldn't be put off.

I'd be turned off by the self- satisfaction scenes ( if there is more than one).. But waiting for the sex for a more meaningful time, I'd prefer, so your logic is solid there.

Thanks for your responses!

Hello everyone.... Hope you guys are trying to stay warm...At least in the Midwest...Back to the topic at hand...I feel that sex scenes can't hurt... Its just when you are beating a dead horse that tends to kill the story..Like the characters are having sex every chapter and it kills the plot..The book then leans to being pornographic rather than a great steamy read.There can be too much of a good thing. The stories I write, depending on the chapter have at least 3 chapters dedicated to keeping it hot an steamy.

It depends upon the overall page count, and the quality of the scenes...

If the sex is done to where it "seasons," rather than "overpowers" the story, then it's all well and good..

Overall, I'm more interested in reading a story that details the Chase/Courtship, and then builds up to the "Bing," the "Bang," and then the "Boom."

Savannah Frierson's is an excellent example of one man's "Chase" leading to his ultimate "pleasure."

New chime-in! As an areligious person, I'm learning I prefer sex in books, but explored in more ways than just jack-hammering a va-jay-jay to death.

I do get why people prefer closed doors. Maybe more books could spend more time getting the characters to know each other, but at the same time, it's difficult to convey days-weeks-months in a single story. And my attention span is short, so I get bored with a lot of nothing going on.

The perfect sex scenes to story are Nina Jones's Debt. The sex is nucellar and fits the story to perfection.

I like sex scenes that feel natural, needed in the dynamic of the plot. I prefer two sex scenes over one. One sometimes feels like it's just for show. For me, two is a way to mimic "real life" in a way. A lot of couples , if not most, have sex more than once, they have some kind of sex regurlarly, in my mind, the story should reflect it. I don't mind not too developped sex scenes, it doesn't have to always be a four to ten pages action. And I also feel that if I'm there for all the sometimes ridiculous back and forth, I deserve some pleasure time.

Julia971 wrote: "I like sex scenes that feel natural, needed in the dynamic of the plot. I prefer two sex scenes over one. One sometimes feels like it's just for show. For me, two is a way to mimic "real life" in a..."

AGREED! Your comment mirrors what I also think about sex scenes.