Young Writers discussion

So I have this friend who has decided she wants to write a novel. So far, it's three pages long handwritten.

The problem is that she wants me to tell her whether it's good or not.

I mean, it's okay. It's just that the writing style is a little awkward, the dialogue is awkward, and reading it is awkward. Because:
--She made me the heroine.
--My crush is my best friend and he's an alien.
--One of my friends is my brother and he's an alien and he's working for the bad guy.
--My mom dies for no reason.
--All of my friends are made into mythical creatures.
--The characters' personalities change a lot and they are not developed at all.
--There is no conflict yet besides me and Jeffrey, my best friend/alien ((in real life my crush)) trick or treating together. Which is weird, because most people trick or treat with their family. (Yes, I'm almost 14 and I trick or treat. It's not weird.)

But guys.

My editor instincts are kicking in.

I need to help her with this.

I just don't know how.

See, she's really sensitive. She doesn't know what a critique is. She's really defensive. She won't be able to tell if I'm helping her or hurting her when I want to help her.

It's. just. so. confusing.

Please help me.

How about you tell her that its really nice only that plz change your best friend in the book ( you real life crush) because you dont want her to think that your just friends and then say that you crush dosent like trick or treating and maybe she will get kind of dissapointed and say that plz dont make my mom die because its really sad .did it got better?

Maybe give her all the things that are good about the story first so she'll feel good about it, then give her some advice on the things that should be changed.

Or vice versa.
Or both at the same time..
Just give her the positive and the negative in an equal amount.. With the positive outweighing the negative somehow.

Don't tell her to change it directly, just give your opinion in a way that doesn't sound too suggestive. If it was me I'd say something like "Its so cool that you made me the heroin, but don't you think that could be limiting because you know me already? Its really fun making up new characters, you know?"

And when giving tips on developing character or plot, you can give her books and authors that relate to her story? For her to use as examples and/or guides.

Thats all I can think of really.. Maybe you guys can pretend you're an actual editor and she the client, to keep it light. Hah idk.

Being honest––especially with sensitive people––can be tough, but if she wants your advice it's probably the best thing to do. If it makes you uncomfortable that she's writing about you and other people you know in real life, you should probably let her know that. I mean, all she'd really have to do is change the characters' names, right? But anyway, on the topic of giving critiques without hurting her feelings:

- As Halah said, it typically helps to be balanced in your critique. Don't focus solely on what you think should be changed. Let her know which parts you like and what's working well in the story before you tell her what you think needs to be improved. If she's not used to criticism, explain to her that just because you criticize something doesn't mean that it's a bad story; it just means that you believe in her and you think she can do better. Offer to read more drafts if she makes changes. If she wants to be a writer she'll have to learn how to take feedback––if she can't, then she probably shouldn't be a writer.

- Be constructive but be careful about how you phrase your criticisms. Try to avoid saying things in a negative way ("I don't like ____") and instead focus on expressing your suggestions in a more positive way ("I think it would be really cool/interesting/powerful if ____"). In my experience critiques seem to be more helpful if you focus more on what you think the writer could add to make it better, rather than focusing only on what you think they should take out, if that makes sense.

Hopefully that helps!

Thanks guys. I'll try these and get back to you.