The Moon and More discussion

Bad enough that he jerked Emaline around on the college thing, but at least she was old enough that her personality was already formed. Poor Benji had to get the full force of his crummy parenting. "I don't know why he can't entertain himself -- I let him go outside for a whole two hours every day! I thought we could bond by doing separate things!" He talks about his son like he's an enemy; I wish Emaline had told him that.

I mostly wanted to pity him because, he didn't learn over the years how to own up to his mistakes. Or how to grow up like an actual adult would. Sure, he found someone else and had another kid, has a job and etc, but the amount of shame he felt over Emaline as a whole proved he has a whole lot of growing to do. Accepting that not everything will go 100% your way. Or making choices, good or bad, do have consequences. And I think part of that has more to do with his upbringing. I don't get the feeling he was the kind of guy who got into trouble much.

Anyways, I don't entirely dislike him because, he is trying. And I wouldn't say he thought of Benji as the enemy. But I don't get the impression he was ready to be a father, or knows what it means entirely to be a dad. I think he would've been better off trying to have a pet after another marriage. The whole bonding thing sounded like he wanted a colleague who had similar interests, but didn't need looking after. Or in better words another adult to interact with every now and then. Not a ten year old kid. Also, I have faith in Benji having his mom and Emaline to look after him. Or at least give him the normal childhood he deserves, even if his mom is forcing crossword puzzles at him occasionally. And maybe Benji's dad will come through, or try to give a bit more effort into parenting if he can tear himself away from work aka academics all of the time. But that's just me being optimistic.

On the other hand, I believe this made Benji's dad more human. Having flaws. Not being perfect. Not knowing how to be an adult, even if you are one. Even Emaline's mom had her own issues, but acted more the adult than her former husband did. Either way, it's part of life.

You've got a good point about dad wanting another adult instead of a kid! But he would have been less irritated (dad, I mean) if he had lifted some (or all) of those restrictions. I can't think of any good reason why he couldn't be outside for more than two hours a day, in the summer no less. Being outside all day is the definition of summer for a kid! And the bit about "I'm not allowed to ride a bike because inner ear problems " sounds like dad was too stingy to buy him a bike.

Inner ear problems can be a serious condition; such as having vertigo, which is like being motion sick without being on a boat for an example. However, I do wish there was more input about it because, I do find it odd that Benji can do normal kid related things without any of this being explored; which kind of seems like a shame. But, this is a story about Emaline after all. And I think their dad would've had to devote his time to getting Benji a bike, which was something he wasn't great at doing as Emaline pointed out towards the very end of the book.

As for the dad being easily irritated, I think dealing with a divorce, while also having Benji to look after, selling his mother's house, and keeping up with work can lead to whole lot of stress. On the other hand, I agree about being outside for two hours a day isn't enough for a ten year old kid such as Benji. However, I imagine the restriction has more to do with not having another set of adult eyes on Benji to look after him. Parents can be overprotective, or only have so much time to juggle everything around. And I get the impression Benji's dad was used to a certain lifestyle of not having to look after Benji as much because, they lived in the city. Which would explain why Benji has a whole lot of new experiences when he gets to Colby and sees Emaline.

Good observations! Mind if I friend you?

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