Young Writers Group discussion

I told you that you were wrong

You recoiled at my criticism

I was never right

How could I be?

After all I was only a student

I was only a stupid teenager that can’t think for herself

I knew I was right

So I told you I was and you weren’t

Something which not many people do

You reacted with hate

A raging fire of hate for me because I was the one to stand up to you

After that

it wasn’t the same.

I had to put up with your sneering and cold remarks

I was silent but my face told many stories

I didn’t really need to say anything

you knew already.

From the first time I told you that you were wrong

I was a thought that wouldn’t go away.

The paranoia kicked in for you,

convinced I was telling my stories to my friends.

Because that’s what they were to you, strories.

It wasn’t the truth to you, I was merely speaking in fairytales.

I told you

This poem is intense but the first word that popped into my head was dramatic. Dramatic is not necessarily a bad thing. I think I like this poem and now I am going to share an advice someone gave me. In your poem you said this person "reacted with hate" well expand on. Tell us what he did to react with hate. Like did he rip up your homework because he hated you so much. There are a few more places in which you can do that in.

Wordy wrote: "This poem is intense but the first word that popped into my head was dramatic. Dramatic is not necessarily a bad thing. I think I like this poem and now I am going to share an advice someone gave m..."

I appreciate the feedback. With regards to what you said, I can see how I could add stuff in there but I also said afterwards about sneers and cold remarks. Thanks for the feedback :)

Courtenay wrote: "Wordy wrote: "This poem is intense but the first word that popped into my head was dramatic. Dramatic is not necessarily a bad thing. I think I like this poem and now I am going to share an advice ..."


I know you had said "sneers and cold remarks" I would still expand a bit so your poem develops even more.

Wordy wrote: "Courtenay wrote: "Wordy wrote: "This poem is intense but the first word that popped into my head was dramatic. Dramatic is not necessarily a bad thing. I think I like this poem and now I am going t..."

Thanks for the feedback :)