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Mrs. Everything
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Forgiveness, of others and of the characters' own selves, is an important theme in the novel. Discuss how the characters work through their conflicts and how they do or do not resolve the issues.
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Compare and contrast how Jo and Bethie are influenced by their mother. Is there a defining element of their relationship with their mother? How does it weave its way into the sisters' lives?
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MRS. EVERYTHING spans half of the 20th century and the early part of the 21st. What period details make you feel immersed in each decade? Were there any details that you remembered from your own past? Were there details about life in earlier decades that surprised you? What effect did this have on your reading experience?
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In MRS. EVERYTHING, Jennifer Weiner has created many memorable secondary characters, from Mrs. Kaufman to Lila to Jo's and Bethie's partners and beyond. Did you have a favorite? What qualities made them come alive for you?
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Were you ever frustrated by the choices Jo and Bethie made? Did you empathize with their choices, despite feeling frustrated?
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Literatire is full of sisters with complex relationships. Do Jo and Bethie remind you of other favorite sister duos? What is it about the sister relationship that captivates us as readers?
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What draws Jo and Shelley together? After they've reunited, what keeps them together?
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What do Bethie and Harold learn from each other throughout their relationship?
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Because MRS. EVERYTHING takes place over several decades, it touches on many political and social movements. Did you learn anything about American history while reading? Was there a cause or issue that particularly interested you?
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When Lila visits Bethie for the summer, they have a heart-to-heart about the pressure Lila feels from her mother to be special and achieve great things. Bethie tells Lila that is comes from the lack of options the sisters had growing up in a different era: "Some girls did grow up and became doctors and lawyers and school principals... A few girls did grow up and do things, and got those jobs, but for the rest of us, we were told that the most important thing was to be married, and be a mother... She just doesn't want that to be the only choice you have" (page 392). Though Lila does have more opportunities available to her than her mother and aunt did, she (and her generation) faces new challenges. Did you relate to Lila's concern?
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How does faith - both religious and in a more general sense - inform Jo and Bethie? What does faith mean to the sisters?
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Jo and Bethie are very different people. But in what ways do you find them similar? Do their similarities outweigh their differences? How do their similarities cause problems in their re..."
Both Jo and Bethie struggle with the coldness of their mother. they want their mother's approval more than anything in the world. Yet their mother can only give approval with reservations or criticism. They are both made to feel worthless.
I think their similar desire for acceptance is harder on them than accepting their differences. Each time they fall out of favor with their mother is at a time when the other sister is being admired by their mother for some accomplishment. There is a sense of competition created by the mother.
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Forgiveness, of others and of the characters' own selves, is an important theme in the novel. Discuss how the characters work through their conflicts and how they do or do not resolve th..."
Working through pain and forgiveness is a repeated theme in this story. Jo yearns for forgiveness from her mother for being "unnatural", she wants forgiveness from her sister for failing to protect her, she wants to forgive herself for being untrue to who she really is, she wants to forgive Shelley for her weakness, she wants her daughters to forgive her for her failing.
Bethie struggles to forgive her mother and sister for not protecting her after her father's death, for the blame she received when she became pregnant, forgiving herself for putting herself in a situation where she is raped. She struggles with the guilt over stealing Jo's future, for running away, for not meeting her mother's expectations.
Each of Jo's daughter's also struggles with her own guilt and struggle to give and receive forgiveness.
Through all of these struggles the reader can reflect on his/her own life. Forgiveness is a gift one gives oneself.
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Compare and contrast how Jo and Bethie are influenced by their mother. Is there a defining element of their relationship with their mother? How does it weave its way into the sisters' li..."
Jo and Bethie in turn are judged and hated on by their mother. With Jo the defining moment with her mother is the moment she calls her unnatural. With Bethie it is the moment her mother judges her for being pregnant. Each of those moments cause the women to judge ALL other actions and moments in their lives by that one judgement.
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In MRS. EVERYTHING, Jennifer Weiner has created many memorable secondary characters, from Mrs. Kaufman to Lila to Jo's and Bethie's partners and beyond. Did you have a favorite? What qua..."
My favorite secondary character was Harold Jefferson. He is one of the good ones. I believe Mr. Kaufman, the father, would have loved and accepted Harold. He was brave and loved Bethie for exactly who she was.
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MRS. EVERYTHING spans half of the 20th century and the early part of the 21st. What period details make you feel immersed in each decade? Were there any details that you remembered from ..."
I don't think one decade stands out more than the other. However, I felt that I could relate to Jo the best in the decade when her children were small and they were her world. There is such a sense of loss once the children become more independent and you have to figure out as a woman what else there is for you.
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Were you ever frustrated by the choices Jo and Bethie made? Did you empathize with their choices, despite feeling frustrated?"
Yes and definitely.
There were many moments throughout the book that made me feel this way.
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What draws Jo and Shelley together? After they've reunited, what keeps them together?"
At first I thought that Shelley was drawn to Jo merely as amusement and sexual exploration. Jo is more honest about how she feels and what she is willing to sacrifice for the person that she loves. Shelley, however, is not brave and does not plan to break with convention because she does not believe that she can withstand being rejected by her family.
When they finally make their way to each other neither of them has anything to lose. They tried it the traditional way - husbands. The time to be true to themselves finally arrives.
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What do Bethie and Harold learn from each other throughout their relationship?"
They are so honest with each other. They know that their lives will be hard because of their different backgrounds and religions. But they are honestly their for each other and accept each other exactly they way they are, with all of their flaws laid out in the open.
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When Lila visits Bethie for the summer, they have a heart-to-heart about the pressure Lila feels from her mother to be special and achieve great things. Bethie tells Lila that is comes ..."
Absolutely, Lila like her sisters are supposed to make it big and be the shining examples of EVERYTHING that women CAN be. However, Lila really just wants to be a mother, it is what she is interested in and, as we see with the babysitting and with Tim 2 at the end, what she is good at.
Jo and Bethie are very different people. But in what ways do you find them similar? Do their similarities outweigh their differences? How do their similarities cause problems in their relationship?