Gathering Of Dedicated Scribblers discussion

I'm writing my story in 1st person past. This is the first time I have tried writing in 1st person. I chose it because I really wanted to show the events from the intimate perspective of the characters, so they can see and comment on how the other person is reacting. My story is sci-fi but also heavily about friendship (at least, that's my intention).

I got a comment today that said 'The narrating voice of the various characters is the same. The POV doesn't change. The way Olivia, an old lady, describes things, is the same of her young girls, etc'.

I've been thinking about this and I think the person is right, but earlier in my chapters, when I tried to have them being more chatty (to show their differences), I was getting comments saying I was using too many filler words.

Anyway, I was intentionally trying NOT to write Olivia as a typical old lady. I want her to be young at heart and feisty. And Agatha and Jana (the 16 yr old main characters) are best friends from the same school, so would likely sound quite alike (BFF teens do tend to mirror each other in my experience). I'm trying to moderate their vocabulary a bit to make them sound a little different, however.

So my question is, does anyone have experience writing multiple characters in 1st person POV? Can anyone offer some thoughts or advice.

This is a really hard thing for some people to do. For a long time my favorite author was Pierce Brown who wrote "The Red Rising" trilogy. After its success he would later attempted at extending his series. His 1st book, #4, he changed it into a multi POV much like George RR Martin. It was awful. Absolute garbage.

My advice would be to first write out the chapter. The characters are going to sound alike because they all reflect their author, you. However, now that its all written you can try to get into 1 character mind set, lets take Olivia for example.

Now go through and try to change only Olivia's mannerisms. Her dialog. She's older so her vocabulary should be more elaborate when compared to Agatha and Jana. Think of elder words. Does she have a favorite saying? Does she refer to her passed best friend or husband? "Well you know what ole Tom would say about that.... He'd say that..."

When Agatha and Jana speak they are going to sound much more alike as you've said. They'll likely have more acronyms in their vocabulary. "Well you know, YOLO!" To give them a bit of difference try making one a hypochondriac or a negative Nancy attitude. A bit more Tomboy or Girlish also works well.

These two you should be able to rewrite at the same time for whatever trait you give one, it will lack in the other and you can comb through both characters at once. Which one is your alpha? Who seems to lead the duo? Which one makes the decisions while the other loyally follows?

I agree with Andres, this is a second draft problem, write the first draft down first, and then work on stronger differences between voices.

Thank you for the suggestions, everyone. After dithering for a few days I did decide to just keep writing for now, to get the story on the paper. Then I will go back and work on bettering their personalities. I feel like I `know` them all really well in my head. I have to just work on getting those differences to show on paper.

Thomas, thank you for the comment, really. It came just when I was having this exact concern in my head, and then I read your review and I was, like, yeah, I thought so...shit! Hahahaha

You have all been a great help. Thank you so much.