Read Women discussion

November's open choice non-fiction selection is Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-first Century, a collection of 37 essays by disabled writers, edited by Alice Wong.

Wong's highly anticipated collection celebrates the lives of disabled people while making a powerful political statement about the need for disability justice, representation, and an end to violence in all forms. By foregrounding the stories of disabled people of color, it rejects the whiteness of rights-based disability discourses and builds the intersectional strength of the disability justice movement. In the book's introduction, Wong shares that her goal in making disability visible is not to inspire those without disabilities or offer up the lives of multiple marginalized disabled writers for analysis. Rather, the collection is a statement of community, love, and solidarity for disabled people. Her dedication on the front page is a moving statement of Disability Visibility's mission and impact: "To my younger self and all the disabled kids who can't imagine their futures. The world is ours, and this is for all of us." Excerpted from a review published in Disability Studies Quarterly. https://dsq-sds.org/index.php/dsq/art...

Alice Wong

Alice Wong (she/her) is a disabled activist, writer, editor, media maker, consultant, and the founder and director of the Disability Visibility Project. Wong was born with spinal muscular atrophy. In 1997 she graduated with degrees in English and sociology from Indiana University at Indianapolis. She has a MS in medical sociology and worked at the University of California, San Francisco as a Staff Research Associate for over 10 years. Her debut memoir, Year of the Tiger: An Activist's Life was released in September 2022. Disability Intimacy: Essays on Love, Care, and Desire, her next anthology, will be released in February 2024.

Access this link for info on Wong's 100 episode podcast series: https://disabilityvisibilityproject.c...

Here's a 1-hour interview conducted by Maysoon Zayid at the NY Public Library in 2000 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXSWb...

Michaela nominated this book and will lead our discussion. When I read the description and began to get a sense of Disability Visibility's significance as well as its intersectional approach, I switched my vote from my nomination to Disability Visibility, and I'm looking forward to our discussion.

Who is planning on joining?

I've just remembered I have credit on my kobo account so I will be able to join in after all. I'm looking forward to reading this. As a person with a hidden disability who isn't often taken seriously, I'm hoping to find some relatability in this read

Hannah wrote: "I've just remembered I have credit on my kobo account so I will be able to join in after all. I'm looking forward to reading this. As a person with a hidden disability who isn't often taken serious..."

Yay! I hope so, too. I loved reading that the intended audience isn't readers without disabilities (teaching empathy and understanding) but readers with disabilities. Much more appealing positioning, from my perspective.

Thanks Carol for the introduction to the author! Just started listening to the interview. I like that there are translations for the visually and hearing impaired. Looking ahead to the read!

Michaela wrote: "Thanks Carol for the introduction to the author! Just started listening to the interview. I like that there are translations for the visually and hearing impaired. Looking ahead to the read!"

You're welcome. Thanks for this great nomination.

Yes, thanks for this nomination Michaela I'm so glad we're going to be discussing such an important work.

Carol - thanks for the link to the interview. I watched the whole hour last night. I found it to be really interesting, insightful and inspiring. I'm going to start reading right now because I can't wait any longer!

I'm so glad this book won! I originally wanted to read Year of the Tiger: An Activist's Life first, but I'm willing to change the reading order for having company for the read 😁
I think I should have access to the audio, but have to check...
(Also, turning on the notifications this time! 🙈)

I think I will take this slowly, as at least the first story I read contains so much food for thought and discussion.

Michaela wrote: "I think I will take this slowly, as at least the first story I read contains so much food for thought and discussion."

I am conflicted about this first essay. On the one hand, I want to read everything Harriet McBryde Johnson ever wrote, and find her in turn brilliant and down to earth and vibrant and relatable. On the other, I am not persuaded by the close of her essay. I find her sister’s, Beth’s, arguments so much more persuasive, and Harriet’s denial frustrating. But I 100% love this essay and the journey it took me on, as a reader. It also gave me a new reason to … dislike Peter Singer.

I googled Harriet Johnson and she’s lovely, with a direct gaze and warmth that are palpable. I’m sorry that I was not aware of her during her lifetime.

What a great start to this essay collection.

Carol wrote: "...What a great start to this essay collection."

Agreed!
I'm torn whether to dive forward immediately or attempt a reading schedule: maybe 1 essay per day? What are yall's plans?

My thoughts on chapter 1 "unspeakable conversations" by Harriet Mcbryde Johnson

I found the attitude of Singer to be completely shocking on two levels. That people without a certain level of cognitive abilities (including babies) aren't considered 'persons' to him. And secondly that it is not only acceptable, but preferable, to kill individuals whom he doesn't consider to be persons. I can't wrap my head around this. Who is he to make a distinction like that? Who is he to decide whose life is or is not worth living? Initially I was debating in my head whether he also thinks that all plant and (nonhuman) animal life should also be killed, assuming that if infants aren't 'persons' then no other species can be either. And then I read on to discover he is an animal rights activist!!! What?? Flabbergasted.

Another thing that struck me was probability of wheelchair destruction in airports. Destruction!!! How is this acceptable?

I am aware that my shock at these things indicates my ignorance in the area of physical disability (my disabilities are mental/neurological). Even though I learned a lot; that this was written for disabled people and not primarily for non disabled people was clear in this chapter. Johnson did not explain her arguments or why she didn't agree with Singer. She skipped over the content of her lecture and the q&a. What we got instead was a purely personal account of her lived experience through this time. Immersive and very well written too.

Joelle.P.S wrote: "I'm torn whether to dive forward immediately or attempt a reading schedule: maybe 1 essay per day? What are yall's plans?"

I was thinking 1-2 essays per day to fit it into the month

Carol wrote: "I find her sister’s, Beth’s, arguments so much more persuasive, and Harriet’s denial frustrating"

I found this to be strange as well. But I saw it less as a denial and more of a transcendence on her part. She wasn't sinking to his level of scorn and hatred and "these people don't deserve to live'. Instead she accepts that people are always going to disagree and they have the right to do so. All you can do is engage in honest dialogue and accept your differences. How she managed to do this with such a bigot is beyond me but I admire her greatly for it!

Hannah wrote: "Carol wrote: "I find her sister’s, Beth’s, arguments so much more persuasive, and Harriet’s denial frustrating"

I found this to be strange as well. But I saw it less as a denial and more of a tran..."

This makes sense. I characterized as denial because I understand her argument to be, if I start judging everyone whose views align with Singer's, there'll be no one left to be friends of. She was comfortable with her level of tolerance and she gets to make the rules for her own peace of mind, naturally. I agree with being polite, but not because I deem his advocacy harmless.

Hannah wrote: "My thoughts on chapter 1 "unspeakable conversations" by Harriet Mcbryde Johnson

I found the attitude of Singer to be completely shocking on two levels. That people without a certain level of cogni..."

Singer is the single source of most of the philosophical objections to eating meat in my lifetime. I never knew he took this position on persons living with disabilities, though. If their lives are not worth living or deemed less worth living, what about someone born into grinding poverty or an inmate with 5 life sentences or [insert other examples here]? I wonder what level of disability he thinks tips the scales into dispensable. A little bit of brain damage? deafness? severe asthma? Geez Louise.

The casual expectation of wheelchair damage hit me like it hit you. How is this okay with specialized equipment you can't replace on a dime? What's the alternative? Ground transport everywhere? Helicopters?

She wrote a memoir! Too Late to Die Young: Nearly True Tales from a Life. There are a couple of brief YouTube videos (5 minutes; 2 minutes) that I watched to hear her voice.

Thanks for all your thoughts Ladies!

I also think the first essay kicks off the questions of What is Disability? Is it already wearing glasses, and do some people with severe disability feel disabled? Thinking of a man in a wheelchair after having been paralysed by a car accident, as he travels, drives a car and even by train etc, more active than I am. I think it depends on how you describe yourself, how you look at your life, but sadly also how others look at you.

I couldn´t get over Singer´s ideas to not eat meat but to decide who is or isn´t worth living. Reminds me of the Nazis. I understood the argument of abortion vs. killing born people, though the other way round. I don´t want to forbid abortion, but it´s not understandable why a recently born child isn´t killed but an 8 month old fetus could be aborted. (Know I won´t make friends here.)

I read three more essays today, one a praise to a dead black disabled trans man, one about fasting at Ramadan by Maysoon Zayid who was also on the YT video, and one about beauty in art and life which was long but not very illuminating.

Carol wrote: "I understand her argument to be, if I start judging everyone whose views align with Singer's, there'll be no one left to be friends."

Oh yes I'd forgotten she said this. That strikes me as being so very sad. That she couldn't hold people to a higher standard for fear of having no one left in her life. Very sad indeed

Michaela wrote: "What is Disability? Is it already wearing glasses, and do some people with severe disability feel disabled? Thinking of a man in a wheelchair after having been paralysed by a car accident, as he travels, drives a car and even by train etc, more active than I am. I think it depends on how you describe yourself, how you look at your life, but sadly also how others look at you."

This is a really interesting point Michaela. To me, the term disabled makes me think of how much someone is held back from being able to do everyday things. If a person has found a way to do everything that they want to do, even if it is in a slightly different way to how most people do it, then are they still disabled? I personally consider myself to be disabled because I cannot do very many things. I've had migraines pretty much every day for the last 10 years (as well as mental health issues). As a result my body responds to light, sounds and smells with pain. Even if I don't currently have a migraine, the smell of someone's perfume causes physical pain in my nose and then triggers a migraine. This holds me back from living very much of life. I can't work because the pain is too severe. I can't go out after dark because lights hurt my eyes so much that I can't cope. I don't go round to the homes of friends and family members because the scents of artificial air fresheners, detergent and perfume cause me so much pain it's not worth it. Yet people look at me as a person with all my limbs and body parts appearing to function "normally" and would never consider me to be disabled. If I try to explain to somebody just how affected I am by my condition they don't believe me. They can't see it so they think it's not really there. I've lost family members from my life over this. They think I'm exaggerating, they think (and have told me) that I'm just not trying hard enough. Can you imagine saying that to somebody in a wheelchair?

I view disability as a lack or weakness or difference in physical or mental ability from a perfectly healthy norm. So, yes, I've worn bifocals since I was 7 and very much feel vulnerable because of my poor vision. Without vision correction, I can move around my house, but otherwise have only hearing and speech to support any engagement. (side issue - I have very little sense of smell, so am counting on feeling heat or seeing flames not smelling smoke to save me from a burning building.) I can't drive, can't read or make eye contact with a conversational partner sitting 3 feet away. I have nightmares about not being able to find my glasses or contacts, and the dark is scary because everything is so blurry. Generally, though, in 2023, it's a disability I am able to manage relatively painlessly. It's a big differentiator though, and when I am unable to wear my contacts due to an infection or whatever, I'm limited in more activities because my peripheral vision is unreliable.

Does this disability compare in terms of life impact to the majority of others or to the ones we've read about so far in this book? No, but comparing the scope of impact of one's disability is not a productive way to engage on the topic.

I keep thinking about Singer advocating that any baby with Down's should be killed and thinking, then it's not about how satisfied the disabled person is with their life. He's making an across the board judgment based on undisclosed criteria about which disabilities matter, and the ones that he deems matter remove 100% of life value but others (like mine, perhaps, who knows?) he doesn't "count" as a detriment.

Of course most of the people in this book (I think, as I only read a few) are what people think of when they hear of disability, so mostly things you see - from a wheelchair to a tube or a "not perfect" look, as in the story about the twins with Crouzon syndrome. It´s important to understand that there are disabilities you don´t "see", like an acquaintance with Morbus Crohn or people with mental health issues. I have been suffering (and that´s a word that´s fitting here) of depression and anxiety for years - something you couldn´t see and that people with this illness often try to hide. It´s a spiral because when you do less you get less friends which depresses you etc. But I´m dsgressing...

Anyway, I think that nobody should decide over your life. I asked myself why Harriet (I´m using the surnames, as they are thus listed in the annex of the book) was against assisted suicide, as there are obviously people who don´t like to live anymore, though often not the disabled but those with cancer. A legislation has been passed a few years ago here in Austria that allows people to take a "death" pill prescribed by a doctor, after having seen two doctors, and a deadline of a couple of weeks or months has passed. I hope that such people get the treatment (physical and emotional) that they deserve, so that it doesn´t come this far, but I don´t know how I would decide for myself. Okay, digressing again...

See next post...

I read the story of the Indigenous girl and the obvious bad treatment of Indigenous (also interesting the question of "Native Americans" or any other term that includes America) on the whole. I knew about the illnesses brought over or induced by the white, but I didn´t know about the worse treatment they got, and I wondered why you had to write your "race" on the sheet for treatment. Any sense in that?

The stories in this book so far include other issues than disability, like race, gender, sexuality etc. Insofar those people experience other difficulties than "only" their disability.

I also found it interesting to read the story of the Nigerian girl who was forced to pray (and act) for the healing of her bad sight - which of course never happened, as even the doctors couldn´t do anything. With this I revert to other people (family, friends, colleagues) putting the label disability on you or not helping you deal with your difficulties. Alice Wong and others of course feel disabled but not only this. They learn to live their life with it and do things they can do. Of course not everyone is able to fulfil their wishes, because it´s just not possible. If they´re lucky they find something in life that has a meaning for them.

Michaela wrote: "I read the story of the Indigenous girl and the obvious bad treatment of Indigenous (also interesting the question of "Native Americans" or any other term that includes America) on the whole. I kne..."

My guess on the first question is that any organization receiving funding either through a foundation, a non-profit or the federal government tracks the recipients of care/benefit by race in order to provide that data in support of future grants and funding. Most of the time those categories are aligned with US Census categories, but they change over time due to activism and expressed preferences. The many indigenous tribes aren't aligned on alot of these political questions.

I ached for that girl - June Eric-Udorie's story, "Waiting to be Healed," and was calmed by its happy ending. Imagining waiting for something to happen in the future to fix you and make your life worth living. Whether it's, when I have a boyfriend, when I get married, when I lose all of this weight, when my eyes are "fixed" by God. So much time lost. I'm glad for June that she got to a good place mentally and shook off the well-intentioned but harmful beliefs of her people. Loved, loved, loved this essay.

In terms of empathy, I tend to think it's more difficult if you had one experience in your life and then something changed. Ray Charles loses his sight by age 7 vs. Stevie Wonder who has never known vision. But maybe it's not, and that's me projecting how I think I'd respond to a loss or change.

I'm about to start, "The Isolation of Being Deaf in Prison," and - without reading a word - am in awe of its writer for going through that experience.

Thanks for explaining, Carol, and yes, I could imagine it being harder when you loose an ability than when you grow up with it.

I now read the story about Jeremy being deaf in prison too, and it must really have been a hard time for him. They just denied him the human right to speak in his own language. In Austria sign language is only accepted since 2005, so I guess there would be a rule saying that those speaking sign language have the right to an interpreter, in court or elsewhere. From my elder daughter who´s learning Austrian Sign Language I know though that children who are hard of hearing or deaf don´t have enough teachers in their language.

Michaela wrote: "I asked myself why Harriet (I´m using the surnames, as they are thus listed in the annex of the book) was against assisted suicide, as there are obviously people who don´t like to live anymore."

If I understood correctly I think that what she was against was that assisted suicide shouldn't be legalised only for disabled persons and nobody else. And also that if other support wasn't lacking then less people would want to end their lives. I think that's what she meant but correct me if I'm wrong. Personally I believe that anybody whose life is so unbearable that they feel unable to go on should have the right to end that life. IF nothing can be done to improve their quality of life to a liveable degree. I do see where Johnson was coming from though. Only allowing it for one group of people and not another doesn't make sense whichever way you look at it.

I had read elsewhere about the shocking statistics about indigenous women in health care and in regards to abuse in general. That didn't make it easier to read though. The figures are still shocking. I can't understand the attitude of the nurse who refused to give her prescribed pain relief. I'm wondering where this comes from. I've heard before about the commonly held belief that black people don't feel pain as much as white people and am wondering if this is a similar thing. Rumors started to try to justify slavery believe it or not... There are no words ....

I'm a little behind you guys on the rest of the essays and will comment when I catch up

I understand now what she was fighting for/against, thanks Hannah. Agree about free choice.

Take your time; I know it´s not easy to read about so much pain and injustice.

I finished the ex-con’s essay on his prison experience and am so angry on his behalf. The reminder for me is that prisoners in the US generally have only the rights for which they’ve litigated through to a final Supreme Court ruling. I spent a semester studying US prison litigation and most of it occurred in the 1940s - 1950s. Lots of focus on religious expression and forced labor. Little to nothing on services, and access to programs , for disabled inmates.

Carol wrote: "I ached for that girl - June Eric-Udorie's story, "Waiting to be Healed," and was calmed by its happy ending. Imagining waiting for something to happen in the future to fix you and make your life worth living

Oh my goodness this story spoke to me so much. I feel as though I have been waiting on a similar way. I've seen so many neurologists and tried so many treatments and natural remedies but nothing has worked. I feel like my life is on hold, waiting to be fixed, waiting for the relentless pain to stop. And the pressure to fix myself doesn't just come from within. Family members can put so much pressure on you to fix yourself for their sake also as you feel you are making them suffer too. I find it disgusting but unfortunately believable that her mum hung up on her when she tries to speak to her about accepting her disability. But to be made to believe that God has forsaken you and refuses to heal you when he could is absolutely heartbreaking.

Michaela wrote: "Alice Wong and others of course feel disabled but not only this. They learn to live their life with it and do things they can do. Of course not everyone is able to fulfil their wishes, because it´s just not possible. If they´re lucky they find something in life that has a meaning for them"

This is what I loved about that video interview. I found them both to be so inspiring the way they live their lives to the fullest and accept themselves as they are so totally unapologetically. I hope to get there myself one day, as did June in her story :)

Carol wrote: "I finished the ex-con’s essay on his prison experience and am so angry on his behalf. The reminder for me is that prisoners in the US generally have only the rights for which they’ve litigated thro..."

This is absolutely despicable, I truly don't know how he got through this experience. I was so glad to hear at the end that he is taking legal action. It's awful to think how many people there must be in similar situations right now who don't have the means to communicate, who are silenced and denied their human rights. It's just unthinkable

Michaela wrote: "Of course most of the people in this book (I think, as I only read a few) are what people think of when they hear of disability, so mostly things you see - from a wheelchair to a tube or a "not per..."

I had missed your comment earlier. I agree that disabilities others can’t see get ignored and short shrift in terms of accommodations. We talk a good game, generally, in 2023 about mental health and getting therapy, but we hold it against anyone who avails themselves of therapy and isn’t “fixed” to our satisfaction, or who isn’t med-compliant, as if the available suite of med options are without risks and are wholly effective. But I digress.

I got a copy from my library and am now realizing it’s the young readers edition with only 17 essays. I’m still reading it but in hold for the original version. Although I am happy it has been made more easily accessible for young readers.

That´s interesting, thanks Anita!

Thanks also Hannah for sharing your story with us. It must be unbelievably hard and good money for those with "natural" remedies.

I read the last two stories in the Being section. Thought the first one was hard to understand, on the one hand the writing style, on the other I didn´t quite understand what she wanted to transport. I didn´t even find out what a Tryborg was... Obviously one part of the concerns the selling of "Cyborg" parts on Ebay.

The second is again about finding a cure, here with chronic pain when doctors can´t even find out if it´s fibromyalgia or "only" Lyme. Liz divides between disabled people looking for a cure by themselves or others wanting those people to be "fixed". I found it especially sad (and I think someone mentioned it above) that she was pain-free or had at least less pain for a while, but then fell back on her chronic pain. She also tried everything in my eyes esoteric in her despair, besides the many doctors and therapists she saw, only to find out they were either incompetent or wanted her to be healed because it would have proved their method to be the right one.

Michaela wrote: "Thanks also Hannah for sharing your story with us. "

Thanks Michaela. Thank you for sharing your story also. It's not easy to talk about anxiety and depression, I have this also.

I didn't understand a word of that cyborg essay and ended up skimming it wondering if it was only me. I didn't understand the language, they style or many of even the basics of what she was talking about.

The one about a cure was awful and wonderful to read. I've been there with trying everything desperate for a cure but also scared to hope and so so exhausted that giving up on a cure and accepting yourself as you are sounds like bliss but not quite being able to let go. I've also experienced the torture of temporary relief. Just occasionally I'll get maybe a week with no pain and it feels wonderful but also terrifying. What do I do with my life now? Then the pain comes back bringing with it so much grief. And, just like she said, it feels worse now because you've experienced what being pain free feels like. Then you start analysing every little thing you've done to see what might have created the mysterious cure or the trigger for the pain. It. Is. Exhausting. I think the author portrayed this very well

Anita wrote: "I got a copy from my library and am now realizing it’s the young readers edition with only 17 essays. I’m still reading it but in hold for the original version. Although I am happy it has been made..."

This is interesting. I wonder how they changed it? Why isn't the book suitable for young readers as it is? Did they simplify the language somehow?

For those who participate in Amazon kindle things: Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-first Century by Alice Wong is on sale today 11/5 kindle US $2.99

Hannah wrote: "Anita wrote: "I got a copy from my library and am now realizing it’s the young readers edition with only 17 essays. I’m still reading it but in hold for the original version. Although I am happy it..."

So far it seems to be just less stories. They may have chosen to omit certain topics, but until I finish and get the full version I couldn’t tell you which ones those were or if the language was simplified. I have a feeling the essay on assisted suicide discussed above won’t be in this young readers edition.

I read three more stories, the first ones in the section of Becoming.

The one about growing up in institutions as an intellectually disabled person was sad, but thankfully turned out well. Who would believe that the author and his also intellectually disabled wife were "allowed" to get married, had a child and worked on their jobs and in the community.

I liked the explanation of a blind person not being guided by her dog but feeling as one with it. When I read that the person was deafblind and called Haben, I remembered that there was a book by her. Anyone read it?

At first I thought that the dressing of queer disabled persons was very marginal but found out that the binary author saw it as a sign for making those persons visible. I liked that they said disabled and old people only wore "medically" looking clothes. And I could relate to the bands only existing in several sizes, as it reminded me of bra buying - certain sizes only go with certain cups, so people are standardised.

Liz Moore’s, I’m Tired of Chasing a Cure, was really well-done. And the quantity of serious stuff she’s dealing with is mind-boggling.

Radical Visibility was enlightening. As I read it, I began to think about what it would be like if, every time I needed something tailored, I had to think about whether the tailor would judge or reject me.

Back in the day (early 1990s), I dressed transwomen competing in gowns in the various East Coast pageants, and the level of gratitude they had because we would work with them without judgment (with excitement, tbh, because it’s always energizing to be part of someone’s big event or day) made us tear up multiple times. Everybody deserves to wear apparel that expresses how they want to look, whether they want to blend in, show off, or something in between.

Haben Girma’s story is what I’m ending on tonight. Maxine and Mylo, the very good dogs. Thanks for mentioning Girba’s book since I want to find a copy. She wrote Haben: The Deafblind Woman Who Conquered Harvard Law. She’s of Eritrean descent. Here’s a link to her website. https://habengirma.com/. Bonus: she narrates the audiobook.

Thanks Carol for mentioning Haben´s book and audio! I´ll add it to my tbr list. So exciting to hear you worked with dressing transwomen!

I read three more stories, two that deal with the authors´ descents, one African-American, the other Asian-American, which of course implies additional problems, and the third of a cancer and stroke patient who learned to know the other side of her life as a doctor when she becomes a patient. This was something where I thought more doctors should stand in patients´ shoes, best before they start to work.

The Asian-American woman Sandy Ho had difficulties not only outside but also inside her family, but also showed how expressions for disability had changed in the Chinese signs/words.

The black woman with cerebral palsy Keah Brown I think mentioned that the "average" disabled person is a white cis male in a wheelchair, so everything else is an additional difficulty. What I liked was that she said you don´t have to be happy every day, sometimes you only just exist, but there is Hope.

Michaela wrote: "Thanks Carol for mentioning Haben´s book and audio! I´ll add it to my tbr list. So exciting to hear you worked with dressing transwomen!"

I learned a LOT during that time : ) My favorite client wanted to fully transition but couldn't afford to, was saving up, but then he spent $XX,XXX on a custom dress, too, so self-care and external approval and the like were often in conflict. (He won!!) He was a husky guy so this whole issue of undergarments that don't fit was really, really real. It was also a time when, if you didn't see an acquaintance for 4 - 6 months, and you were aware he was intimate with men, you worried about his health and 50% of the time your worry was well-placed. The first protease inhibitor was approved in June 1995; before that there was no cure or much in the way of treatment. 1995 was also the peak year for new AIDS diagnoses. But I digress.

Carol wrote: "Radical Visibility was enlightening. As I read it, I began to think about what it would be like if, every time I needed something tailored, I had to think about whether the tailor would judge or reject me.."

I hate the clothing industry and how sizes and proportions make you feel like there's a preferable way your body should be. I do get frustrated but it's nowhere near to this level. I can't imagine how it feels to have to get everything taylor made just so it fits your body the way you want it.

This essay did feel a lot more explainy than the other essays (sorry my head is fuzzy and can't think of proper words!)

Carol wrote: "I dressed transwomen competing in gowns in the various East Coast pageants, and the level of gratitude they had because we would work with them without judgment (with excitement, tbh, because it’s always energizing to be part of someone’s big event or day) made us tear up multiple times."

How awesome to be part of something so life affirming Carol.
.

Michaela wrote: "I read three more stories, the first ones in the section of Becoming.

The one about growing up in institutions as an intellectually disabled person was sad, but thankfully turned out well. Who wo..."

This read like something that should be happening way back in the past with institutions for "hysterical" women. How awful that this is still happening. People getting squashed down and hidden away 'oit of sight out of mind ' because they're deemed undesirable in mainstream society. This makes me sad and angry. I want to say something positive about the life the author has built for himself but don't want to sound condescending...

Michaela wrote: "I liked the explanation of a blind person not being guided by her dog but feeling as one with it."

I loved this too. And the person who told her she needed to build her own confidence not get it from elsewhere. Some of the soundest advice I've ever heard!

Carol wrote: "Haben Girma’s story is what I’m ending on tonight. Maxine and Mylo, the very good dogs. Thanks for mentioning Girba’s book since I want to find a copy. She wrote [book:Haben: The ..."

Thanks Carol, my library has this on audiobook.

Hannah wrote: "Michaela wrote: "I read three more stories, the first ones in the section of Becoming.

The one about growing up in institutions as an intellectually disabled person was sad, but thankfully turned..."

I understand, and hope my comment didn´t sound this way. He´s obviously an exception.

Hannah wrote: "Carol wrote: "Radical Visibility was enlightening. As I read it, I began to think about what it would be like if, every time I needed something tailored, I had to think about whether the tailor wou..."

I also thought that most of the essays/stories so far were more political than that they showed the daily difficulties to deal with disability, what I had expected. At least that´s how I understood your comment.

Michaela wrote: "I understand, and hope my comment didn´t sound this way. He´s obviously an exception."

Not at all! I didn't mean you. I'm just coming around from a 2 day migraine and can't get my words in order!

Hannah wrote: "Carol wrote: "Radical Visibility was enlightening. As I read it, I began to think about what it would be like if, every time I needed something tailored, I had to think about whether the tailor wou..."

I agree - the Radical visibilty essay was a bit long-winded IMO. Its author was so passionate about his point that I checked how many pages were left a couple of times. I think that was my response to the Cyborg one, too. I didn't really get it, or I did and it didn't capture my imagination like most of the others, so I hit the wall of, 'Fine. Okay. Let's move on."

The nice thing about this collection, for me, is that the majority of the essays have worked and it feels varied in terms of style. Even if they're political, the angle is different or the goal is different, so it doesn't feel like I'm running a gauntlet of repetitive paddles.

Carol wrote: "The nice thing about this collection, for me, is that the majority of the essays have worked and it feels varied in terms of style. Even if they're political, the angle is different or the goal is different, so it doesn't feel like I'm running a gauntlet of repetitive paddles

Agree 100%. They are so varied it feels refreshing. I recently read a different anthology about a topic I loved and totally agreed with but it was such hard work I ended up skimming to the end. This is the opposite, very refreshing and I can pick it up knowing that even if the last one didn't speak to me, the next one won't be the same.