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Depression
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message 1:
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Ava ୨ৎ (showgirl version)
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Aug 07, 2025 05:43PM

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When I wrote my memoir, it was less about literature and more about survival. I bled on the page because I had nowhere else to put the weight. The book became a strange companion, a witness to my spiral through psychiatric wards, addictions and the nights where ending it all felt like the only mercy 🌑
But it also holds the flicker of love that kept me tethered. Obsessive, manic, unholy at times, yet still the thing that whispered stay. In the middle of all the ruin, that love made me write. My name is Oz Gold, and the book is called Through the Flesh. It is raw, unapologetic, and it does not dress depression in pretty clothes. It shows it the way it lives inside me 🌹
I am not here to advertise, only to say you are not alone in that hollow. Words can be an anchor when nothing else is. And if my words reach someone on the edge, then the pain I dragged into print might serve a purpose beyond myself 🌊 Through the Flesh

idk why the same things happen to me-- like something that makes me genuinely happy makes me kind of sad inside

I’ve been experiencing symptoms of depression for a long time, and they got way worse last summer, but this whole time I’ve been masking and pretending that everything is fine.
I thought that I was just lonely, but now that I have more friends and I try to hang out with people every moment that I can, I still feel depressed when I go home and doing the bare minimum to seem ok and keep my life together somewhat is so exhausting
I don’t know what to do to feel better and I don’t really have anyone to talk to
does anyone have any advice?