The Pride Party discussion

For The Aromantics and Asexuals!

I think I might be Ace but I'm not sure lol so idk I'll see when I get older ig

Okay so I’m bored and too like emotional to debate properly so I’m going to explain why I think I’m aro ig and see if anyone else feel like that because I am not the black and white aro unfortunately also I’m sorry if I ramble I’m anxious rn
Okay so I would like to be a in a relationship? Kind of? Like it sounds really nice and I’d like to kiss somebody and be close to them like that, but it also disgusts me.
I’ve been in relationships, and as soon as I’m in them I feel like trapped, and it’s really uncomfortable. I also am extremely grossed out or uncomfortable with romantic words. In some cases, saying I love you is very… dry. I say I love you to people but when I say it it’s platonic and if it’s in a romantic context I don’t like to to say it and it makes me very uncomfortable. Also anything else in a romantic context where they say like loving or complimentary words is really uncomfortable and I don’t enjoy it or want that at all.
I also love romantic books and movies, so sometimes I think I’m not aro, but like romantic acts genuinely make me uncomfortable or gross me out. So I don’t know what’s wrong with me lol

There is nothing wrong with you. As someone who is aromatic and has questioned it for a long time, it sounds like you are definitely on the aro spectrum (maybe Aegoromantic or Cupioromantic, but the label doesn’t really matter unless it’s important to you). As long as you don’t experience romantic attraction/ enjoy being in a romantic relationship, or feel like the label fits you at the time, you can use the label of Aromantic (and if later on you gain new insight and decide to use another label, that’s fine too). Also, questioning if you are aro is perfectly normal lol

༯⊹ ࣪ ˖Katy⊹ ࣪ ˖༯ wrote: "There is nothing wrong with you. As someone who is aromatic and has questioned it for a long time, it sounds like you are definitely on the aro spectrum (maybe Aegoromantic or Cupioromantic, but th..."

Thank you.
That was such a rant ngl I was realllyy anxious.
I want relationships but they make me unhappy, so I’ve decided I’m not going to get into them. I use the label aromantic because it’s easier than explaining to people why I’m staying single, you know?
I’ve looked at aegoromantic and cupioromantic, I think aegorantic describes it best lol.

Np! There are so many aroace ppl online that have helped me realize that I aro and be more sure of my self by sharing their knowledge, so I love it when I have the chance to pass that on and help other ppl

Same!

Imma just rant a bit.
identities are complicated! I fall intensely in love with people a lot, but platonically if that makes sense. For a while I wanted a relationship or people to be in love with me to validate me, but when I thought my friend was in love with me, I was filled with panic and dread. I don’t want a romantic relationship, but I feel sad that I can’t be someone’s special person in a normal way because I don’t like romance. Eventually, I would love to have a QPR (queer platonic relationship), but most people probably wouldn’t want to

Actually I feel that.
I feel like teens my age should be dating and stuff to and I want to be a normal teen and date around and live but at the same time relationships literally make me uncomfortable. To me the ‘talking stage’ is more fun that a relationship, because you get to be like exclusive but no random confessions of love, no romantic nothings, just like hanging out and stuff.
QPR literally sound like a dream lmao

Omg yes exactly!!

I think it has something to do with planes?
That is so funny tho XD

Like aroflux?
Being aromantic is a spectrum. They don’t have to know, their opinion doesn’t matter only yours does because it’s YOUR sexuality. If people ask me uncomfortable questions, I respond with because I want to. It may sound rude but it’s not, they are the one asking personal questions you are NOT required to answer if you don’t want!

You don’t need to know every identity or limit yourself to a highly specific identity, but if you want to know more I would recommend searching the aromatic spectrum on the Gender wiki, and you might also want to check out Grayromantic. If it feels right to label yourself as Aromantic you can certainly use it, and It doesn’t matter where on the spectrum you fall. Also, why is the JaidenAnimations video making ppl realize they’re aro a cannon event lol, that happened to me too!

Honestly, I've struggled a lot with relationships the past few years. When I watch movies or read books that have romance in them, I really desire it. I rarely have crushes, and when I do, it takes a good long time for me to admit that to myself. By having a 'crush', I mean I feel romantic attraction to them and want to be in a relationship with them. There are many times when I find someone really attractive, but I don't actually want to get into a relationship with them, if that makes sense? And I just feel like it's weird for people to start dating after only knowing one another for a month, or simply because they saw them in a store and asked for their number because they thought they were attractive, because it takes me a LONG time to develop feelings. It also takes me a very long time to be comfortable with physical touch in ANY way or even with saying 'I love you'. There have been a few instances where I've gotten into a relationship and then felt 'weird' and 'uncomfortable'. I can feel really depressed sometimes, or 'left out' because I'm single and I really want a relationship, but I can never seem to stick with one because they just make me feel weird. I'm not sure if I fall under the aromantic spectrum, because I really desire a relationship. It's just weird, and I'm not sure how to explain it. Maybe I just haven't really found a person I actually 'love'?

That’s almost exactly how I feel. Especially on crushes, it’s so weird. My friends talk about butterflies and feeling giddy etc., and I’ve just??? Never had that???
Ima go all science on you really quick- crushes are not love. Crushes typically give people norepinephrine or dopamine, love is a mixture of oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, and vasopressin. These are developed and crushed are really not. They are different, and maybe you don’t experience crushes, which is okay!! If you have been in relationships and they make you uncomfortable, you’re more likely aro.
Another thing is aromantic is just a label. It’s not permanent, and if identifying with it now makes you most comfortable, do so. If you realize you did just need to find that special person, that’s okay too!
There’s also sub labels, like cupioromantic(liking the ide and a relationship but not liking being in one), or demiromantic(only having romantic feelings for people you know and and trust) or similar ones. I’m aegoromantic, so basically I love the idea of romance and relationships, I love reading and watching shows about it, but I don’t like when it’s directed towards me. I use the term aro or aromantic because it’s a spectrum and it’s easier to explain to people.

Ah, okay- that makes more sense. Yeah, I've always been iffy with labels. I feel like they can be too 'constricting' sometimes, which is why I rarely use them; especially with gender. It is nice however to have a sort of general label like Aro though, just so other people and myself in a way could understand how I identify and the like. Thank you for the help!

uh so guys i think im either grayromantic or demiaro, or on the lithoromantic side of things.

i'm definitely somewhere on the aro spectrum, idk where really but i'm definitely not a person who goes through a dozen crushes lol

Yess! my people!!!

I agree with Tessie, I couldn’t have said it better

I'm asexual and I've been questioning if I'm some sort of aro because I'm really uncomfortable with like the thought of kissing someone, but i want to be in a relationship
i think maybe its just because ive never even tried it and it just seems weird?

And I've had like maybe 2 or 3 real crushes and one only 2 that lasted really long, only one that i want to be in a relationship with
ive thought like woww that girl is so pretty, and stuff like that many times, but not like crushing on them really

so many aroace peeps- glad to not be alone

Yayy

♪‧◃✮ᴍᴀʀs✮▹‧♪ ~matching w my twin~ wrote: "Honestly, I've struggled a lot with relationships the past few years. When I watch movies or read books that have romance in them, I really desire it. I rarely have crushes, and when I do, it takes..."

WAIT ME TOO LOWKEY

i’ve definitely had crushes in the past, but i just absolutely hate having feelings for someone, but i still want a partner (especially seeing those mlm/gay couple compilations make me so lonely and longing for a boyfriend). i kind of realized i was probably aro a couple months ago, and it makes sense and feels good for me, even tho i’m not a huge label person (i’m queer and aro)

Summoning the ace+aro ppl

It's funny how one gets smoke for being aroace bc ppl say "that's just sad, you don't love anyone? wanna be alone for the rest of your life?"

but it's even funnier when you do get a partner despite being aroace and people say "I thought you couldn't love anyone, what's this?"

the funniest thing is when you don't know how to explain it (though I usually say "the meaning of aroace is LITTLE to no romantic or sexual attraction"

@treyviathan and those people criticizing them have a hard time getting a partner too lmao

how are all the aro and ace people today?

haiii im late but im alr

HEEELLOOOO MY DENMARK CONQUERORS AND GARLIC BREAD GODS