Mental Health Awareness Group discussion

tysmmmmm

ok so i'm really pissed rn. i was in a super good mood earlier today, idk why just the weather was really nice outside and i went hoco shopping last night and i couldn't stop thinking about my outfit, and so around like 2 i decided to take advantage of my good mood and started on my math homework. and it took me three fucking hours to finish, and completely sucked up all my energy and took away my mood. my legs hurt and i feel so drained and i don't even know. i was in such a good mood earlier and i wanted to finally have a weekend to myself, but now it's the evening and i have almost no time left. so another day is wasted.

thanks so much, yeah me too :)

today has actually been shockingly amazing
this week is hoco week, which i thought would be dumb but it's actually really fun. today at lunch the teachers had a "quad day" performance and it was so funny, they were using all the weird slang and at one point all the staff members went "SIX SEVEN", hands and all, and i lowkey wish i had recorded that. i had a quiz after that in my least favorite class, but i feel like i aced it, and then i walked home in the rain. so today is really looking up.

goals for tomorrow:
finish math hw
study for bio
start a new page in my sketchbook

didn't get much sleep last night (fell asleep at like 3:30 and then woke up around 6) but i've been decent this week, i'm really excited for hoco i want to see what it's like. and i'm also kinda obsessed with my outfit.

favorite things about myself:
my eyes
my hair
my nails
my athleticness
my writing
my jeans

things i want to work on:
procrastination
going to bed on time

yah 😂

tw!
alsooo i have a question about sh
is it bad that i scratch myself a lot?
like a lot??
idk why i do it, i've always done it, and i can't remember a day that i don't. i just do it when i feel stressed or embarrased or smth

Sai :) wrote: "tw!
alsooo i have a question about sh
is it bad that i scratch myself a lot?
like a lot??
idk why i do it, i've always done it, and i can't remember a day that i don't. i just do it when i feel str..."

If it leaves a mark, hurts, or breaks the skin at all or is intended to hurt yourself it is definitely sh I think….

Sai :) wrote: "tw!
alsooo i have a question about sh
is it bad that i scratch myself a lot?
like a lot??
idk why i do it, i've always done it, and i can't remember a day that i don't. i just do it when i feel str..."

Depends on the intent. For example: I have naturally dry skin, so I scratch at my skin a lot. That isn't SH. But when I have panic attacks, I have a tendency to scratch my arms till they're red. That is SH.

SH (Or NSSI) is any self inflicted injury or pain on oneself. This can include but is not limited to: Cutting oneself, the burning of skin, the act of hitting yourself (Or slamming your head against a wall repeatedly), and others.

thank you guys sm
also please go to sleep <3 yall amazing peeps deserve rest
(ignore the hypocrisy..)

@Sai

Ofc! And thank you, but I fear insomnia is a dick LOL.

it is thooooo

(for context i haven't been officially diagnosed but i'm like 99% sure i have it)

today has been okay
i hated last night, i went to bed at almost midnight right after doing my homework and my sister was being a bitch to me and i just lay in bed crying for a long time before actually going to sleep
today was better though, pe was fun and my bio test went well, and i'm also really excited for hoco. i just hope that i can go to bed on time tonight

@sai I’m so sorry that happened to you last night, I’m glad today went better tho and I hope you get a good nights rest. If you don’t just know I also have trouble sleeping so you won’t be the only one awake at midnight lol we can stay up together!

thank you so much, i really do appreciate it ❤️❤️❤️❤️ and yes lol, we can stay up together 😂

GUYS I AM SO EXCITED FOR HOCO TOMORROW IDK WHY I JUST AM
i actually really like looking forward to things, because whenever i start stressing out about something random, i can try my best to forget it and think about whatever is making me happy
alsooo if yall want i might upload a pic of my outfit

Sai :) wrote: "GUYS I AM SO EXCITED FOR HOCO TOMORROW IDK WHY I JUST AM
i actually really like looking forward to things, because whenever i start stressing out about something random, i can try my best to forget..."

omgggg yassssssssss HAVE FUNNNNNNN!!!
yesssss uploaddd!!!

tyyyyyy :)
and i probably will tmrw :) :)

i'm in a really good mood rn
just came back from hoco and it was shockingly fun
i'll hopefully sleep well tonight, i feel good

alsooo rate the outfit
i literally bought tall boots just because i'm insecure about my legs lol but they went shockingly well with my dress
i wanted one of those cool leather jacket thingies too but then it would be too expensive lmao
maybe next time
https://www.goodreads.com/photo/user/...

OH

My

GOSH

YOU ARE SO FABULOUS!!!

do i?? 😅
ty so much guys yall don't know how much that means ❤️

tyyy <3 🥹

Sai :) wrote: "do i?? 😅
ty so much guys yall don't know how much that means ❤️"

YESSS! You are absolutely gorgeous! You're killing it in that dress!

Sai :) wrote: "alsooo rate the outfit
i literally bought tall boots just because i'm insecure about my legs lol but they went shockingly well with my dress
i wanted one of those cool leather jacket thingies too b..."

omg it looks amazinggg

Sai :) wrote: "alsooo rate the outfit
i literally bought tall boots just because i'm insecure about my legs lol but they went shockingly well with my dress
i wanted one of those cool leather jacket thingies too b..."

OMGGG GURLLL UR STUNNINGGG

ty guys so muchhhhh <333

WAITTTT SHUT THE WINDOW YOU LOOK ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS

tysmmmm nidhi

i'm really not that pretty guys, thank you so much though ❤️❤️❤️barnette you don't know how much that means to me <3

ty so much guysssss <3333

ok so i'm really stressed out rn and i'm in a terrible mood. i came home at 4 today and have literally only 2 hours to do ALL my hw, plus everything i do for fun, just because my mom thinks it's ok to randomly take away my time on a weekday. it's for diwali, so i get it, but she literally told me that i wouldn't be free for four freaking hours YESTERDAY, so i had almost no time to plan. and i have a lot of schoolwork, and i barely have time to finish it and i feel like the hours are closing in on me because i can't do anything. and i'm super pissed and have no idea what i'm doing. i hate working like this. i always finish my hw at the last possible second, when i'm super stressed out, every single damn time, and it's actually getting to me.

i feel like i'm stuck in a cycle. every day i wake up feeling super stressed and overwhelmed by everything i have to do, but then i calm down and convince myself that i don't need to worry and i end up procrastinating everything. and then, at the last moment, i get super stressed and start crashing out and when i go to bed, i'm feeling overwhelmed again. and when i wake up, it starts again. i don't know what to do. i'm either overly worried or overly calm and it's getting me nowhere.

just putting this out there and i know a lot of people don't relate but i feel like there isn't enough representation for underweight people who're also bodyshamed. like i know it's unhealthy, and i should eat plenty, but it's also not okay to comment on it every single time you see me? people are always like, "why are you so skinny?" and "you're really thin" and it's never in a good way, and it actually pisses me off. i have this one family friend and he's always commenting on it, and it actually hurts. it actually gets to me. i've always been super ashamed of how my arms and legs and torso and back look just because you can see the bones, or i'm really thin in some places, and i literally can't look at myself in the mirror without thinking that i look like a skeleton or my legs could use a lot more curves or my hips could be wider or some other bulllshit.

and so many people also just automatically assume that i'm weak just because i'm thin but it's literally not true, believe it or not it is actually possible to have muscle but not a lot of fat! the thing is though while i do have lots of leg muscle i have really weak arms, and that hurts a lot because i can't even prove to people that they're wrong. and even if we're on the topic of leg muscles, which i have a lot of, people just say that the only reason they're visible or my legs look strong is because i'm thin and there's less fat covering my muscles so i don't even need to be strong for them to be visible (i've genuinely been told this before). and the thing is it's not even true, like it takes actual hard work to develop my strength and i put effort into exercising every day and seeing it dismissed like that actually hurts a lot. and it gets to me. i'm so tired of people thinking it's okay to comment on my weight or assume things about me because of my weight. i'm just sick of it. like why can i not even wear shorts without someone telling me that i look like a stick? (actual statement that i have heard dozens of times before). even some of my friend tell me stuff like that and i know they aren't trying to be mean but it still hurts, why does nobody see that?

literally 😭tysm barnette <3
like i know that i could be healthier. and hearing it once is okay. but i don't need to hear it every second of the day. and i don't need to hear how ugly or how weak you think i am.

Barnette ⋆˙⟡ wrote: "Sai :) wrote: "i feel like i'm stuck in a cycle. every day i wake up feeling super stressed and overwhelmed by everything i have to do, but then i calm down and convince myself that i don't need to..."

thank you so much <3 this actually means a lot, i'll come back to this whenever i need it tysm <3 🫂

Barnette ⋆˙⟡ wrote: "Sai :) wrote: "literally 😭tysm barnette <3
like i know that i could be healthier. and hearing it once is okay. but i don't need to hear it every second of the day. and i don't need to hear how ugly..."

tysm seriously 🫂🫂

i feel like a mess. during the weekdays i go through this weird cycle of being stressed, then brushing it off, then being stressed again and repeat. and on the weekends i feel heavy and burned out for no reason and just want to rot in bed in front of a screen. i don't know what to do with my free time but i also hate having a crammed schedule. i literally feel stuck. i've forgotten how to enjoy things. i can't even remember how i used to pass my hours. i keep on switching between random things i only semi-enjoy and my head feels like it's full of cement and i can't stop procrastinating schoolwork or going to bed really late but i literally have no idea what to do. the only hobbies i can think of are reading and drawing, and i don't even have the energy for those. my legs and back are sore from sitting so long. i feel stuck. i feel like no matter what day it is, i just can't enjoy myself. my only modes are stressed and burned out.

Barnette ⋆˙⟡ wrote: "Sai :) wrote: "i feel like a mess. during the weekdays i go through this weird cycle of being stressed, then brushing it off, then being stressed again and repeat. and on the weekends i feel heavy ..."

ty <3

i don't really know how today's gonna go. i was really tired this morning, last night i was really uncomfortable (this happens a lot) and i couldn't fall asleep, i think i drifted into light sleep around 5:30, then woke up at 6, then couldn't go back to sleep again. so 30 minutes of sleep. yay. and now it's almost six pm, and i've done none of my homework and i have to leave for a class that i'll only be back from at 8:30. and then i have to eat dinner too. and i'm stressed about something i need to tell my parents, as well as do my homework. so i feel really stressed. there's been like this tightness in my chest the whole day. i actually hate it so much.

I know how that feels, but you got this! Schoolwork literally sucks hope you can take a break soon <3

thank you so much, that really means a lot <3

tysm actually ❤️❤️❤️ thank you both for commenting

I feel like today's off to a good start. Bc daylight saving ended (or started i have no idea which lol) yesterday, i technically got to wake up at 8 this morning, and I'm also feeling really productive. Hopefully my mood lasts.