Alternative Romance discussion

Name a thing or a place or a theme or whatever and the person below you has to recommend a book with that in it and then name something else for the person below them.

I'll go first...

Cannibalism

Fuck me, I can't believe I can't come up with a single John Russo book that qualifies. I know there is one, I just can't remember which. And since Lords of Chaos would be too flip, Jack Ketchum's Off Season.

And now for my old favorite, necrophilia. Please, for the love of god, come up with something I haven't read.

I bet this is one: The Return of the Horny Dead by Rhonda Lee

Bestiality

I know theres a book in my brain that better fits bestiality, but I'm going to go with Without Reservations by J.L. Langley. Cause it the only book where I can remember action happening after one of them shifts into their wolf form.

Insect

As long as it doesn't have to be insect sex, Michael Clark's The Proteus Vector. Scenes from that book actually squicked me out, and I don't squick.

A damn good bowl of chili. And not in a cookbook.

EDIT: Robert beat me

Don't Look Down by Jennifer Crusie featured a crocodile named Moot. It was cute.

Atlantis

Acheron by Sherrilyn Kenyon

Squid

Squid Pulp Blues is the first one that pops into my mind. I haven't read it yet, but it's certainly on my list. It looks pretty awesome if I do say so myself.

Jesus Toast

You win.

Squid Pulp Blues was really good..Jesus Toast made me think of Powdered Toast Man from Ren & Stimpy, does anyone remember that or am i crazy?

Merzbau wrote: "Squid Pulp Blues was really good..Jesus Toast made me think of Powdered Toast Man from Ren & Stimpy, does anyone remember that or am i crazy?"

I remember Powdered Toast Man!

Dude, hell yes!

that was such a great show, i can't believe it was on nickelodeon..that and what was the show with Rocko? Rocko's Modern Life or something?

Ya, it was Rocko's Modern Life. I miss these shows...

i know right? growing up in the 90s was pretty rad

If only we had faster internet at the time...

we had..super nintendo and...pen pals?

I..........never had a pen pal..........

me neither...wanna be pen pals?

I was forced to have pen pals in school. The experience still haunts me...

Sure!

And, do tell LinBee! Was it with an inmate?

awesome, how do we go about becoming pen pals?

yes LinBee, we must know, was it an inmate?

848 La Mesa Way
Manteca Ca 95336

Write me.

cool, i definitely will...does pen pals make anyone else think of Homer's bowling team The Pin Pals? why does everything remind me of cartoons lately?

It didn't until now...

sorry...i'll try to stop relating everything to cartoons

It's fine with me, it's the only thing I can relate to.

Merzbau wrote: "awesome, how do we go about becoming pen pals?

yes LinBee, we must know, was it an inmate?"

My sis has to read their letters for her job (to and from) and from what she tells me... yikes.

I loved it when Bart got letters from Sideshow Bob written in blood. He was passing out and Nelson's older guy counterpart goes "Dude, use a pen!"

thanks Christy

haha great episode, and at the risk of further outing myself as a cartoon loser, Sideshow Bob's cellmate was Snake, one of my favorite minor characters
since Christy said it was ok for me to keep talking about cartoons, here's a bit of personal history that relates to the Simpsons: its thanks to the Simpsons that i discovered Edgar Allan Poe at a young age, the first episode of Treehouse of Horror had Lisa reading the Raven
your sister reads incoming and outgoing mail from convicts? that must be endlessly fascinating, how do you get a job like that?

I love Snake too. Especially the one when he has the evil hair that possesses people. (Mustaches are inherently evil but I'd never thought to suspect toupees before that one.)

My favorite Treehouse is when Bart has the twin they've kept locked up and fed fish-heads. (I'm fascinated with all twin stories in a self-obsessed twin kinda way.)

You should work in a criminal facility like a jail or a prison to get that job. (Maybe it gets boring after a while. She does tell me all the letters start exactly the same way.) My grandma is a nurse in a work release facility and the stories there are really messed up. And disgusting. Probably the best job for people who are endlessly fascinated with gross medical stories and prisons.

Okay, let's start the game over.

Robots on Mars

Christy wrote: "Robots on Mars"

Aw, I thought that'd be a perfect subject for me to offer recommendations on! But only one short story is coming to mind :/. It is set on Mars and is sort of a romance story, but there are no robots :(. It's called "The Silent Towns"; it's part of a collection of short stories that make up the book "The Martian Chronicles" by Ray Bradbury.


Asexuality

I'm just curious if that even exists; a romance novel where one or both of the leads is self-identified as asexual. Can you even have a romance novel without the characters experiencing sexual desire for each other? lol.

You can totally have a romance novel between asexuals.

I can't think of any books where the characters identify as asexual but there are a lot that are non-sexual even asexual relationships of romantic love...does that count?

Christy wrote: "there are a lot that are non-sexual even asexual relationships of romantic love...does that count?"

Hmm, for non-sexual relationships, I guess it would depend on why the relationship is non-sexual? If it's because one or both of the characters is celibate, impotent, etc, then that's not really asexual cuz the person is choosing to impose a no-sex lifestyle on themself.

Relationships of romantic love that don't involve sex because the characters have no desire or need to go to that level would count, I think :)

When there is no sex there is usually no mention of it either so I've never seen a character express no desire or need, they just don't.

Christy wrote: "When there is no sex there is usually no mention of it either so I've never seen a character express no desire or need, they just don't."

So if they don't have sex in the novel then they don't tend to ever mention anything about sex?? Hmm, yeah, that kind of thing seems like it could make it difficult to really identify if a character is asexual or not. I mean, just because a couple doesn't have sex within the span of a novel doesn't necessarily mean that the characters would never have sex, they just might not have gotten around to it. So the novel could be considered an asexual romance story, but that doesn't necessarily mean the characters are asexual. It seems like unless the character(s) blatantly mentions they are asexual you might not ever know.

That is true.

I've wanted to do a series of romance novels featuring sub-culture characters like those but I'm not sure...I am not a romantic person so I doubt I could do it justice but then again, writing something I never do is more fun than not.

Wouldn't it be great if there was, like, a subversive-Harlequin small publisher that did books like those (and crazier *drool*) I'll pray for that. I would buy the shit out of those books.

Aw, you're probably more romantic than you think... In your own sort of twisted way.

Christy wrote: "Wouldn't it be great if there was, like, a subversive-Harlequin small publisher that did books like those (and crazier *drool*) I'll pray for that. I would buy the shit out of those books."

I wonder if they'd keep the covers just as cheesy and over-the-top ...How crazier? lol

The covers are the best part!!!!!

But the ones from back in the day were really lovely looking



Then the 80s came and shit got real



Now they try to make the covers look YA-art-ish



Since this is a fantasy, there should be all of it!

Look what I found in my photobucket:



I somehow know you were involved in whatever joke that was.

The best cover is that first one. It really sort of tells a story in itself. The 2nd one is exactly the kind of cover people think of when they think "trashy romance novel". The 3rd one just looks like they are trying to draw the reader's attention to the guy's butt with the cleverly placed rose stem that points down to it.

Christy wrote: "I somehow know you were involved in whatever joke that was."
I can honestly say that I had absolutely nothing to do with it! All I know is you posted it one day on...PCF/HIAF (can't remember if it had already change at the time). And it's Zac Efron's body with Rob Zombie's head.

Oh, now I totally remember that. Zac Efron was on TV and I thought he was ugly so I made that to make myself feel better.

Christy wrote: "Oh, now I totally remember that. Zac Efron was on TV and I thought he was ugly so I made that to make myself feel better."

lol He looks like a cross between an anime pretty-boy and a Disney prince come to life. Although, the most recent pic I saw of him he had a really short buzz cut and had put on some more weight/bulk. I think it was for a movie role or something...

I like your style, you can work as illustrator for my fake press.

Christy wrote: "I like your style, you can work as illustrator for my fake press."

Sweet! Even though I can't find a real job, at least I have an imaginary one in place.

I'll pay you a million dollars per hour.

I just discovered this thread, awesome.

Asexuality? Ariel: A Book of the Change is all about a romance between an asexual unicorn and a heterosexual man. It's also post-apocalyptic and it has an ex-LARPer samurai. It was my favorite book as a kid.

Narcissism/clones.

.....................WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!

*wishlisted*

See this is why I had to look for recommendations elsewhere, you didn't even recommendate nothin' for me about the narcissistic clonesex request I made. Sheesh.

I will graciously expand my request to include robots which look like or are otherwise based on their creator though. Like Superman's Superman robots, or like Ultron is to Hank Pym.


brb googling "ultron hank pym slash"