Writer Group discussion

So basically this a continueing story. Everybody writes a little bit and lets the next person write a little bit more.

I'll start

It was dark, and nobody could see anything...

Lightning struck outside the window, making everyone jump...

I sat in the corner, knees pulled up to my chest, wishing it would all end. It was stupid for a 16 year old guy to sit in a corner like a little kid, but even the adults were doing it.

50 people, me included, were huddled in a shelter. I'm not so good in enclosed spaces, so being in a dark room with so many other people was not my cup of tea.

Outside the weather had gone crazy. Over the thunder and rain I could hear sounds of gunfire. We'd been in here for three days trying to wait it out, but we were running out of food and water fast.

(( I hope that wasn't a little too random to work with... if so, just tell me and I'll change it...lol))

The enemy had been working on cutting off supplies for weeks. "I think they finally achieved their goal."

Suddenly, the wind picked up even more and there was loud thumping on the roof that was not caused by the rain. I was sure that outside the sky was turning green.

I could picture the funnel cloud forming, and I prayed that it wouldn't touch down. Our shelter wasn't much good against tornadoes.

Split. That was the terrible sound that was heard before all the screaming. I happened to glance over to my right and noticed them. Three men.

They were in ugly gray uniforms. They weren't here to give out hugs. That was for sure. They had huge guns in their hands. Everyone was moving away. Everyone except for a girl my age, with short dark brown hair, and an elfin face with sharp angles. Her back was turned to the men, and one of the men raised a gun. They were going to make an example of her, to enforce obedience. Not fair! My mind shouted. They couldn't just shoot her down, without warning or anything. She was innocent! I ran and barreled into her, just as the gun went off, and I heard bullets ricochet off the wall behind him, where the girl had stood a moment before. I felt a burning in his shoulder. I looked at it; a bullet had grazed him, but not too badly. The girl lay under him, unmoving. Had I knocked her out?

"Hello? Ms?" He said, shaking her. He thought he had heard her moan but he could not tell because of all the screaming and guns. Someone tapped on his shoulder. He looked back and saw...

(wait, is this a first person narrative, or a third person? In the beginning it seemed like first, but it's changed to third.)

((Ok, that was my fault, srry... not used to writing in first person and I switch back by accedent sometimes...))

One of the men in gray. He grabbed my bleeding shoulder and yanked me off the ground.
"You'll pay for that, boy." he said in a low raspy voice. He threw me roughly on the ground next to the girl I had just saved. There was a blasting pain on the back of my head, and blackness swarmed over me.

I awoke... By a pond in a place I was not familar with. The only thing I recognized was the girl sitting next to me.

She was watching me. Analyzing my every move. I watched her watch me, and slowly got up.

"Hello," I said, shakily.

"Hi."

"Who are you?" I watched her carefully to see her reaction. She didn't answer. "Do you know where we are?"

She was hesitant. Almost as if she didn't want to tell me...

After a while though, she said, "I...I can't" then she fainted.

"breathe?" i finished for her in my head. but that wasn't the thing to do when a person fainted. What was the thing to do when a person fainted? i wondered.

I had learned this in scout camp. I think. Um. I was completley stuck.

Racking my brain, I scooped pond water into my hands and splashed it over the girls face.

i hoped she wouldnt swallow it and drown, being unconcious and all.

"Please...please wake up." I said shaking her a bit. "C'mon..."

"Ugh" She said, coming to.

"Phew..." I murmered, sitting back on my heels. "You ok?"

"uh.. I think so.." She said.

"What happened?" i asked, confused. "Does this happen a lot?"

"Actually," she said. "I never thought people actually fainted until now. Don't try it. You think you're dead." she started almost laughing. But then she remembered where she was and became forlorn again.

"Well, now can you tell me where we are?" I asked, practically begging.

Her face looked contorted. "I-I....."
I groaned, "Please dont go on me again."

As she went under, I was so upset. ARGH I thought. Where am I ??????????????

Nothing seemed familiar but the passed out girl next to me. I splashed her with water again. "WAKE UP!" I bellowed.

She didn't wake though. I did it again and again.

"Please?" I whispered. No way was I doing CPR...

I ended up having to. Her breath was... stale, and I did not enjoy it.

(HAHAHAHAHAHAHA) I coughed, disgusted, "I swear, I've done everything, you HAVE to wake up" I said annoyed.

still... silence.

Was she......dead? The unwanted thought entered my brain.
"Please. Oh come on!" I pleaded. "You can't just die!"

Glaring at her, I thought I saw her stirr. Wait did she?

She opened her eyes slowly and I sighed in relief. It wouldn't have been good if she ahd died.

i decided right then that i wouldn't ask her again where we were, though that was the main question on my mind.

"You...better?" I asked, trying to be gentle.

"Does it look like it?" she huffed.

I shrugged.

"So...uh....why do you keep fainting exactly...?" I trailed off...

"Don't make me think about it." She said, looking sicker than ever.

"Uhh... ok?" I said, confused.

I sighed. "So have any idea...how to get us out of...this situation?" I asked.

Then she did something totally unexpected. She burst into tears.

"I don't even.... know you...." She struggled to get out. "They're making...me...." She fainted yet again. Something was NOT right. she came back a few minutes later and gave him a tortured look.
"What do you mean 'they're making you'?" i demanded.
She shook her head, covering her face with her hands and crying.

I didnt know what to do! i was as lost and confused as she was! I grumbled. "Can you manage any clues? Write it in hte dirt?" I asked carefully.

"They're watching." She whisper horsly.
My head whipped around automaticlly, looking for 'them'.

"So you...can't write in the dirt?" I asked confused. I didnt see anyone yet her eyes kept darting around. Personally I was begininning to think the girl I had saved was crazy.

I sat down, very tired, and tried to plan my next move.

(Huh)

(what do you mean 'huh')