1000 Jokes discussion

Wooooh!

So a blonde goes into an electric shop and asks to buy a TV. The man running the shop tells her she can't buy one of his TVs because she's blonde.
Outraged, the woman goes home and puts on a brown wig and sunglasses, then comes back to the same store, talking with an accent, and asks the man if she can by a TV.
He rolls his eyes, and tells her no she can't because she's a blonde.
Amazed, she pulls off the wig and asks him how he knew she was blonde.
He hands her back her package and says, "because that's a toaster."

lol

I've heard a lot of versions of it too :D sorry if it's kinda awkward, i wrote it from memory so it might not be exactly right. in the original i think she might have come back in a red AND brown wig

Q: What do SMART Blondes and UFOs have in common?
A: You always hear about them but never see them.

Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms?
A: They think their picture is being taken.

Q: How do you kill a blonde?

A: Tape a mirror to the bottom of the pool

Q: What do you call a smart blonde?

A: A golden retriever

There was this bar and in the bar there was a magic mirror.

If you told a lie it would suck you in.

One day a brunette walked into this bar. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in.

The next day a redhead walked into the bar. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world' and it sucked her in.

Then the next day a blond walked into the bar. She walked up to the mirror and said 'I think...' and it sucked her in.

A blonde lady was driving along the highway when a blonde police officer pulled her over for speeding.

Officer: May i see your licence?

Lady: what does it look like?

Officer: its a rectangular thing with a photo of you on it.

The lady looks through her bag and pulls out her compact mirror and hands it to the officer.

The officer opens it up and says 'if you had told me you were a police officer I wouldn't have pulled you over.'

~Heather (Lacrosse4Life)~ wrote: "Q: How do you kill a blonde?

A: Tape a mirror to the bottom of the pool"

HAHAHAHA. YES. BEST ONE EVER.

:D breaking dawn status XD

YUP.

That was one of the ONLY things i liked about the last book :) that and EMMETT! he was SO funny

hahaha. I love Emmett!

yeah, if i COULD date a twilight actor, well actually it'd be Jackson Rathbone first, cuz he's just SOOOOO adorably amazing *sigh* LOVE him.

but next would be emmett cuz he's a teddybear :D

I'd date/marry/have his babies with Taylor Lautner :)

My teddybear's name is Emmett. No lie.

Huh, i'd like to have a fling with Taylor ;) but i wouldn't wanna stay with him, TOO much pressure and other girls willing to take him. i'd be self conscious and feel unworthy xD HAHA i already have bad esteem, no chance i'd last with a guy that saught after


REALLY?! THATS SO CUTE

yeah, me either, but a girl can dream, right?

haha, thankies. :)

Yup day dreamin :D

Ur welcome, wen'd u name it that?

months ago. I don't remember.

How you confuse a blonde: Put her in a circular room and tell her to find a corner.

How a blonde confuses you: She comes to you saying she's found the corner and wants to show it to you.

Q. Santa Claus, a smart blonde and brunette walk down the street and see a $20 bill, who picks it up?

A. The brunette, the other two don't exist.

How do you entertain a blonde?

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you are so funny honey cakes..........nice joke

knock knock
who's there
cow
cow who
cow dont go who they go moo

♫♪Black Lavender♪♫ wrote: "How do you entertain a blonde?

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XD Niiiiice

Another way to entertain a blonde

Give her a peice of paper with "Flip me over" written on both sides

so shes gonna keep on fliping....
lol now tht is very funny