Creative Writing discussion

*Here is the official discussion thread for Penned.

*To avoid side chats in the actual thread, please always talk here.

*Please do not talk about what should be said or what you want in the story. Just flow with what happens.


~~~~~Summary:
In penned there is a Kid named Night that got a Tattoo that his Uncle forced him to get. The Tattoo has a pattern that runs down his entire left arm. Night goes to school and to his surprise a new kid shows up. The new kids name is Barret(t). On Night's way to class his left arm begins to tremble and hurt. The trembling stops after a while and Night goes to his first class. In his first class his left arm starts to hurt and shake again so he asks the teacher to go to the nurse. The teacher lets him go but Night goes in the bathroom instead. Barret(t) asks the teacher if he can go with Night to the nurse to make sure that Night is alright. Barret(t) sees that Night went into the bathroom and he follows him there.

In the bathroom Night figures that Barret(t) is the one that is making his arm hurt. And it is true. But Barret shows Night the exact same tattoo that Night has, but only it was on Barret's right leg. Nights arm begins to tremble again and Barret gives him instructions on how to control it. Night's tattoo turns from black ink to red ink and Night is able to control where it goes and what is writes.

Barret tells Night that there are a total of four kids with the Tattoo and there is one master that tells them what to do and where to go. And the master is also Barret's guardian because the Master took Barret in when his parents "Died". The two boys ditch school and Barret leads Night to an abandoned basketball court where he does a flip and lands on his right leg making the ground split and a portal to open with the blue in that came from Barret's tattoo. They hop inside the portal and it takes them to a corridor that has no exits. They walk forward to meet M, their Master. Barret is afraid the whole time and Night is called up to speak with Master.


~~~~~Character Profiles:
Night- Main Character. He was forced to get the tatoo on his left arm, by his uncle. Average personality.

Barrett- The "new kid" Barrett has been traveling all over looking for Night. His parents "Died" and he lives with the Master.

Master/M- Violent but puts on act of kindness towards Night. Full body of tattoo. Gold.

I am liking very much how this is turning out.

If fact i was going to have Barret tell Night that he would "learn how to do that soon" in my post, but i just didn't want to control what happen.

But i have a question. Is it Barrett, or Barret? with two T's or one?

((what is happening in Penned? Summary!)))

In penned there is a Kid named Night that got a Tattoo that his Uncle forced him to get. The Tattoo has a pattern that runs down his entire left arm. Night goes to school and to his surprise a new kid shows up. The new kids name is Barret(t). On Night's way to class his left arm begins to tremble and hurt. The trembling stops after a while and Night goes to his first class. In his first class his left arm starts to hurt and shake again so he asks the teacher to go to the nurse. The teacher lets him go but Night goes in the bathroom instead. Barret(t) asks the teacher if he can go with Night to the nurse to make sure that Night is alright. Barret(t) sees that Night went into the bathroom and he follows him there.

In the bathroom Night figures that Barret(t) is the one that is making his arm hurt. And it is true. But Barret shows Night the exact same tattoo that Night has, but only it was on Barret's right leg. Nights arm begins to tremble again and Barret gives him instructions on how to control it. Night's tattoo turns from black ink to red ink and Night is able to control where it goes and what is writes.

Barret tells Night that there are a total of four kids with the Tattoo and there is one master that tells them what to do and where to go. And the master is also Barret's guardian because the Master took Barret in when his parents "Died". The two boys ditch school and Barret leads Night to an abandoned basketball court where he does a flip and lands on his right leg making the ground split and a portal to open with the blue in that came from Barret's tattoo. They hop inside the portal and it takes them to a corridor that has no exits. They walk forward to meet M, their Master. Barret is afraid the whole time and Night is called up to speak with Master.





I Highly recommend reading it all before you post in it. Because there are somethings said that are foreshadowing (hinting about the future) and stuff that happened.

john your latest writing was amazing!!!!

The one where Night walks up to the master dude? Thanks!!!!

no problem!

ooooo. i love your posts john. period. this last one was genius too

it was amazing!!!

THANK YOU GUYS SOO MUCH! you have no idea how much that means to me. I want to become an author and am even writing a book at the moment. But i am only have way done with only 50,000 words. But anyway, thats for telling me that. It raises my hopes a lot.

of course i'd read ur book!!!!!!

haha thanks! it encourages me so much. But im in creative writing in school this year!!!! that means i'll get twice as much work done on the book!

yea!!!!

i updated the first post

sweet

nice

like my posts?

YES!!! It feels like Night hates Barrett, but thinks he understands him when he doesnt. And I can't wait till the girl comes into the story! He he, maybe she could be names Sakura...

Yea. I don't care what her name is, but if you or i get the post when it introduces her name, we can put down sakura. and i think i mentioned in the story that there were 5 members of the family total.
one member with a tattoo on the right arm--- Night
one member with a tattoo on the left arm---- ~NA~
one member with a tattoo on the right leg--- Barrett
one member with a tattoo on the left leg---- ~NA~
one member with a full body tattoo---------- Master

possible member:
tattoo on the head and face and neck-------- ~NA~

hmmm.. okay, so the girl will have one and then that leaves one last member of the family.. okay.

Yep, that's it

*sigh* i really want Barrett and Night to go on a adventure together...

oh. thats to bad that it didn't work out that way.

yeah. oh well.

and it's too bad that the girls name wasn't sakura

Never say never in a story John :-)
If I were to post a conversation now...she'd say they'd come over from Japan when she was still a child and that her rea name was Sumire Sakura. She had anglicised her first name to fit in better :-) Google 'Sumire' .....Asami dear....smile for the photo...click, thanks! :-)

P.S.: Or Night's Uncle had 'adopted' her / she was an orphan studying at this school....so that saves us the trouble of killing her parents ;-)

I am confused. Who is Sumire? I thought Night is back at the 'home.' and Barrett is by violet.

Asami, just forget what SW said right there, he was just saying what COULD happen, but idk, it depends on who writes in and how they write it.

Sumire is a not in the story, and Night is still at "home". Barrett is with Violet in the library.

okay. So we are still where we were in the story?

yeah, no deciding what will happen can be assigned in the discussion thread. Whatever happens in the story is what it is.

Are you going to take the next post?

okay and yes!

Her full name Violet Sakura ( original full name if you want complexity : Sumire Sakura) The 'flower' Violet which like 'Rose' is a common name is called Sumire in Japanese :-) Let's go up and see what Asami has penned :-)

a rule, is not to talk about it until it's actually written. So let's just see what people think is going to happen when they actually write it.

Sure John, just shedding light on how Violet actually happens to be 'Sakura' and double checking that we are in no way deviating too far away from the original story line you had planned.

... its a rule not to explain your text, that is how the story evoulves.

Storyweaving... im not a 100% sure you have Barretts character....

;-) unlike in RP, characters in stories continue to 'evolve' revealing different sides of their narure