Dementia - Reading Challenges discussion

If you come across any good quotes while reading feel free to post them here.

"Sometimes I have the urge to conquer large parts of Europe."

"'Have you ever read The Book of Knowledge of Ingenious Mechanical Devices?'
'I've never even heard of it,' said Will. 'Are there any bleak morrs in it, shrouded in mysterious mists? Ghostly brides wandering the halls of ruined castles? A handsome fellow rushing to the rescue of a beauteous yet penniless maiden?'
'No,' said Magnus. 'There's a rather racy bit about cogs halfway through, but really most of it is rather dry.'
'Then Tesssa won't have read it, either,' said Will."

"Because teachers, no matter how kind, no matter how friendly, are sadistic and evil to the core."

I'm going to use this on the next kid that asks me why I'm so mean.

"I had recently come into possession of a Thesaurus. You would not believe how many words there are! When I opened that book, I was like, whoa! Word party!"

..."a vampire, like a lady, never reveals his true age."


"Uh, my lord, I am not actually food. You do realize this, yes?"

"'Oh come on,' Tabitha said in an irritable voice. 'Don't tell me a Roman general is having trouble with penironi.'
'You don't honestly expect me to eat this?' he asked aghast.
She huffed at him. 'Don't you dare cop that superior attitude with me, buddy. I happen to know exactly how you Romans lived. How you decorated your houses. You come from the land of the phallus, so don't act so shocked that I gave you a bowl of them to eat. It's not like I have a flying phallus wind chime hanging in my house to ward off evil or something,...'"

"It's hard to explain, but when she's angry, it feels as though someone has put me together incorrectly, like a bookshelf with a row of upside-down books."

"'...If he finds out that you're involved with a shape shifter--'
'I know,' Caitlyn muttered. 'He'll have kittens.'
Shanna snorted. 'No, Cait. You would have kittens. Carlos is a were-panther.'"


"'I'm not a violent person, okay?...'
'Stab him!'
'All right!' She grimaced and raised the stake above the dummy's chest. Still, she hesitated. The thought of actually plunging a sharp object into a body was so grotesque.
'He thinks you look fat in those shorts.'
'Asgh!' She stabbed him, then gasped and jerked her hand away. 'Oh my gosh.' She stepped back, staring at the embedded stake.
'Not violent, huh?' Carlos smirked.
She glared at him. 'Don't push me.'"

"Angry that he'd allowed himself to be caught like this, he manifested a stake in his hand. 'You know the legend. Stab them in the heart and they'll die.' He handed her the stake.
Susan's eyes held a degree of fear as she wrapped her hand around the stake and offered him a brave smile. 'Call me Buffy. I'm even blond, but don't ask me to wear a halter top.'"

"I can't even pix anyone. I sweat now instead of dusting, did you know that? I've got water coming off of me instead of dust. What the hell can I do with sweat? Rub up against someone and make them puke in disgust? I've seen you sweat, and it's not pretty. I don't even want to think about sex, two sweaty bodies pressed against each other like that? Disgusting. Talk about birth control... "

"By nature, people are petty and jealous. They envy what they lack and because they don't know how to acquire something, they try to destroy anyone who has it. Beauty is one of those things they hate most in others."


"...I come with more baggage than even Samsonite can cover."

"The running pants were tolerable, Drustan decided, relieved. The blue trews had clearly been a torture device and would have strangled a man's seed. Mayhap men were fashioned differently in her time. He hadn't seen one other bulge out there on the street; mayhap they all had wee carrots in their trews. Mayhap there were hundreds of unsatisfied women in this century."


"trew" means pants and the blue one's would be jeans.

"Living in Kentucky is a mix of the ridiculous and the sublime. The same state that is home to top-shelf research hospitals, major manufacturers, and thoroughbred horse racing is a place where you can attend a schoolbus crash-up derby. (They do take the kids off the buses before they race them.) We have Opera Houses and Opry Houses. We have cities that are home to hundreds of thousands and towns like the Hollow, where one day, if the right couple gets engaged, the entire population will be related by marriage."

"Never saw a dude sweat like you, man. Shaking your hand is like squeezing Sponge Bob's ass."

..."Just thinking about flowers. And impressing people. I mean, how strange is it that we bring plant sex organs to people we're attracted to? What's up with that? It's a weird sign of affection....It's like people are trying to be both subtle and blatant at the same time. Like, they won't actually go up and say, 'Hey, I like you, let's get together.' Instead, they're like, 'Here, have some plant genitalia and aphrodisiacs.'"

"What happened to your mom's sedan?...."
"A tree hit it," Erica said. " Totally totaled it. Not my fault. It was squirrel karma."



"Five trolls in dra-a-a-a-ag," the four-inch man sang from my shoulder. "Four purple condoms, three french ticklers, two horny vamps, and a succubus in the snow."

Um...I can't remember Erica at all...


Ivy's sister?

Ya, I had the same thought when she came back into the books. It had been a while and i couldn't even remember her at first.

so it is Ivy's sister? That's good atleast I could figure that out :)

Ya.

A guy is handing out pamphlets on how to prepare Armageddon -

"The End is near!" the man shouted again.
"Is there still time for hot chocolate?" Riley asked.
The End Times guy blinked. "Ah, maybe, I don't know."
"Oh, good," she said. "i'd hate to take on Hell without fueling up."