So many questions! So little time! Let me try to tackle these one by one ...
1) Why is your job so dumb? All the smart-person jobs went to China.
2) Why is this your job? It's karma. In a previous lifetime, you were William Strunk, Jr.
3) Why are you paid to make these people sound awesome? So those people will get jobs making children sound awesome, so those children will grow up to make themselves sound awesome, and become the prime movers of a new hyperbole-based economy that will be, like, so awesome ... it will be incredible. Literally.
4) Why are there so many families anyway? Only because I have not yet perfected my orbital penis removal lasers!
5) Is it 2012 yet? Yes. Somewhere beyond the intergalactic dateline, it is already next year. I can take you to this place if you can help me perfect my orbital penis removal lasers. There we will sip champagne together in zero gravity, and vaporize the genitals of the illiterate by remote control.
1) Why is your job so dumb?
All the smart-person jobs went to China.
2) Why is this your job?
It's karma. In a previous lifetime, you were William Strunk, Jr.
3) Why are you paid to make these people sound awesome?
So those people will get jobs making children sound awesome, so those children will grow up to make themselves sound awesome, and become the prime movers of a new hyperbole-based economy that will be, like, so awesome ... it will be incredible. Literally.
4) Why are there so many families anyway?
Only because I have not yet perfected my orbital penis removal lasers!
5) Is it 2012 yet?
Yes. Somewhere beyond the intergalactic dateline, it is already next year. I can take you to this place if you can help me perfect my orbital penis removal lasers. There we will sip champagne together in zero gravity, and vaporize the genitals of the illiterate by remote control.