Terminalcoffee discussion

Okay, so I've got my first date ever coming up, and I honestly have no idea what to wear. We're not going anywhere fancy, like, just to the movies and Olive Garden, but I want to wear something more than jeans! But I'm not wearing my club outfits either.

This is an excellent and nerve-wracking question, Britt. I will leave this one up to my fashion-betters, but if I was going on a first date, I'd worry like crazy about this, too.

definitely no flip flops! highlight your assets without being sleezy. something fun to match your personality. HAVE FUN Brit!

ms.petra wrote: "definitely no flip flops! highlight your assets without being sleezy. something fun to match your personality. HAVE FUN Brit!"

That's exactly what I want to do, Petra! I want to look cute and desirable without my outfit saying, "My ass and tits are hanging out, so please have sex with me."

so anything velcro is out?

Definitely don't wear anything that you feel you might pull at or constantly adjust, it will make you feel uncomfortable and will make you seem nervous. Comfort is key, because if you're physically comfortable you'll be more mentally comfortable.

Sorry Britt I will be no help here either, but the advice sounds good so far.

What about a pair of capri pants with a nice top?

It's warm out--I like the idea of a long, tiered skirt and a tank top with a cute belt.

Of course I haven't been on a date with anyone except my husband since dinosaurs ruled the earth. So maybe you don't want to listen to me.

Oh and Britt, you know what they say, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

Just kidding, honey. Hope you have a great time. We can't wait to hear all about it.

Britomart wrote: "My ass and tits are hanging out, so please have sex with me."

No advice here other than no matter what you wear the guy is going to be thinking, "Her ass and tits are hanging out. God I want to have sex with her!"

Congrats on the date and have fun (when is it?) and if he doesn't hold the first door available for him to hold open for you then he's not a keeper.

Don't know about the holding the door open, but my rule of thumb was always, listen to the way he speaks of his mother.

Bonus points if he's got some sisters. My husband grew up with a bossy mom and four older sisters, so he was well-trained for bossy me.

Cynthia wrote: "Don't know about the holding the door open, but my rule of thumb was always, listen to the way he speaks of his mother.

Bonus points if he's got some sisters. My husband grew up with a bossy mom and four older sisters, so he was well-trained for bossy me."

God bless Mr. Cynthia :-)

Believe me he needs mucho blessing, Jim. I think his name might actually be Dr. Cynthia (pediatrician.)?

Dr. Cynthia it is!

OK then. Now he's got a name!

Dr. Mr. Cynthia

Now it's just dinner.

Here is the deal with this guy. I met him online, and I arranged an in-person meeting for us last month, and he didn't show up. The meeting was at a coffee shop at 4 in Raleigh, 45 minutes away from where I live. He works 3rd shift, and he didn't get off work until like, 7AM that morning. I know he didn't get any sleep until about...11 'cause we were on the phone.

4PM rolls around, he calls, says he overslept. Understandable. I had to meet a friend to go to the movies at 5 (which is why I was in Raleigh anyway). He said that he didn't have enough time to meet me, and he wouldn't even try to show up. Which really pissed me off, and I stopped talking to him.

But...after I yelled at him for a few days, and I thought about it, I said, well, this guy is nice...and he likes me. I'm not used to guys liking me. Anybody can oversleep, especially those who work all night and went to sleep late. So he convinced me to give him another chance, he has Wednesday night off work, so we're gonna go on a date. I would love to go to someplace nicer than Olive Garden, but I live in a small town, and he has to come to my turf since he stood me up last time.

I kinda have a feeling he's not gonna show. And if he doesn't, I'm done with him because I'm starting to think he's one of those guys who can talk the talk but can't walk the walk.

Good point, Bun. I'm glad I didn't buy those wedges today then.

where crocs. if he likes you in crocs he'll like you in anything

Bun's right on this one.

Normally, for a first date, I'll wear a full or a-line skirt, knee length or longer, w/ a cute top (my fave tops have a boatneck w/ 3/4 sleeve - they show just enough skin - shoulders, neck, back, collarbone to be sexy & confident & they're extremely flattering) or a casual dressy dress w/ comfy wedges - nothing with wire or special fitting definitely nothing tight. I do that because I wanna feel girly & confident. I tend to stick with a classic look for that first date so I'm more focused on what I'm doing & not tripping or saying something completely wrong and less on is my skirt tucked between my butt cheeks or in my panties... It's considerably less for him than it is for me.

Phil wrote: "Dr. Mr. Cynthia"

That is even better, Phil.

Dr. Mr. Cynthia, Esquire.

Bun is, as usual, RIGHT. Again.

Kevin "El Liso Grande" wrote: "so anything velcro is out?"


How about day-glo?

Kevin "El Liso Grande" wrote: "where crocs. if he likes you in crocs he'll like you in anything"

Where? Over here, over there?

And...the guy didn't show.

Yep.

He's a doofus. Please say you're not going to entertain the thought of another meeting!

No, I'm not. I'm done. It's obvious that he's only playing games with me, so.

I should have seen it coming. If he couldn't even meet me when I went to his city, what makes me think he's gonna drive an hour to see me?

Buh-Bye!

I'm sorry Brit(t?)... what a shitbag.

There are plenty of good reasons for him to drive to your city to meet you. He's just a prick.

sorry, Britt. I guess there are reasons people chat online vs meeting in person. what Michael said.

I'm with Barb. Total ass-hat.

*passes out He's an Ass-hat buttons*

*hugs Britt* Better to find out now, but still, it hurts.

Britomart wrote: "And...the guy didn't show.

Yep."

I want to kick his ass silly.

Well, he'll be easy to spot, he's the one with the hat on it.

And people wonder why I'm so down on using the web to "hook up" (not my words). It panders to lowest-common-denominator turds who are too chickenshit to meet in person or, at the very least, talk over the phone. I knew shit like this was going to happen once Al Gore dreamed up a network of talking computers that can send each other stuff over a bunch of invisible nets.

The moral of the story: Disconnect from the grid, get out of the house, and get face-to-face with the next dude, er, guy.

Sorry to hear about what happened, Britt. There are better guys out there in the world, and one will find his way to you. As for Mr. No-Show, it's his loss obviously--but no need to waste another minute of your time thinking about him.

::pins button on sweater::

Dick.

Aww, thanks, y'all. I mean, I'm over it, and tomorrow when I pick up my bestie from the airport, we're gonna go to dinner and hang out, and then I might party with another bestie, and I go back to school next Thursday. I have a lot of other things in my life going on than this asshole.

Brit! You're going back to college! Good for you. Wasn't sure that was going to work for your family financially. Glad you could swing it!

Clark wrote: "And people wonder why I'm so down on using the web to "hook up" (not my words). It panders to lowest-common-denominator turds who are too chickenshit to meet in person or, at the very least, talk ..."

The thing is where do people my age (50+) who are not really outgoing and don't do well starting up conversations with people go to meet? I don't go to bars and I go to the library and coffee shop but then I'm usually reading or typing and I can only hang around the produce dept. for so long. Community Ed classes are good to meet people who are half my age.

I meet a lot of 40- and 50-somethings when I'm riding.

^^^ yes. In Denver, there are a lot of meetups for outdoor activities. A hike is scheduled Sat at 9am and you just show up. A lot of single people, very casual, and focused on an activity. It is a fun way to meet people who share your interests. There are also meetups for theatre, museums, etc. After an activity, some of the group will usually go for coffee, food, or a drink. check it out Michael www.meetup.com

Michael wrote: "Clark wrote: "And people wonder why I'm so down on using the web to "hook up" (not my words). It panders to lowest-common-denominator turds who are too chickenshit to meet in person or, at the ver..."

Yeah, good point I guess. It's just that conversing with someone on line and then meeting them in person only to find out they look like the offspring of a tragic one-night stand between Tammy Faye Baker and Marty Feldman would scare the stool out of me.

Clark wrote: "Yeah, good point I guess. It's just that conversing with someone on line and then meeting them in person only to find out they look like the offspring of a tragic one-night stand between Tammy Faye Baker and Marty Feldman would scare the stool out of me. "

Those bar stools never come out easy either.

Oh you aren't kidding Jim. They smart like the dickens.

ms.petra wrote: "^^^ yes. In Denver, there are a lot of meetups for outdoor activities. A hike is scheduled Sat at 9am and you just show up. A lot of single people, very casual, and focused on an activity. It is a ..."

That's a good idea. I joined Meetup some time back looking for laughter yoga and writing groups but I never thought to look for social stuff there!

My sister has met a lot of fun people through Meetup.