Your writing discussion

This is a story I'm working on. I'd love to become a famous author someday. It's called Drunk on Blood. Please give feedback on what you thought of it, and how I can improve. It's fairly short so far, but I'm still adding more to it. Thanks! :D

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

I've got chapter 2 up, please read it. :D

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

I've got chapter 3 up too.

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

Has anyone read this yet? Please do, I want my story to be reviewed. I really want to be an author someday and need critisism! Thanks! :D

That was really good!!!!

Some advice:

Check spelling.

I feel as if there was a little too much action right at the beginning. I don't really know the character that well; it's mostly action. Maybe you could do more character development?

Besides that, it's SUPER GOOOD!

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it, I'll do some editing now. I'll add more details about the characters. What should I do to make it better? Should I say what the characters are feeling, or how they look? Just trying to get some more elaborated advise. Thanks for reading! :D

Well, not how they look... I just feel as if you jump right into the action, without sparing any time for us to just get to know the main character a bit more...

But don't forget that it's already great!

O.k. thanks! :D

Hey Dylan, i like the idea, but like Lunabell said, i think you should slow down the story a bit. Basically, it feels like all this is happening to this person, but that person is still a stranger, we as an audience aren't really given the chance to connect with Andrew. ok, now it feels like i'm just telling you what Lunabell did..., anyhow, keep up the good work. :)

Thanks, I'll update it and make changes when I have time. :D

I have just finished chapter 5, tell me what you think. Also don't read if you can't watch violent movies. Thanks! :D

-Dylan

I've finished ch. 6! Tell me what you think! :D

-Dylan

I've finished chapter 7 just now. So read it.

I've finished chapters 8 and 9. Please read.