The Mob discussion
Reviews and Feedback :)
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This is "Remember Me?" by yours truly.
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
"Troubled"
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
and finally, "My Ever So Normal Life".
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Id absolutely love it if you guys could check them out for me!! thanks!! XD
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
"Troubled"
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
and finally, "My Ever So Normal Life".
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Id absolutely love it if you guys could check them out for me!! thanks!! XD
Well, you know how much I love 'My Ever So Normal Life' I think it's fantastic! And Cooper.. *sigh*
I also love Remember Me :D
And I'm just in the middle of reading Troubled.
You've got great talent Shine! Don't give up on it!
I also love Remember Me :D
And I'm just in the middle of reading Troubled.
You've got great talent Shine! Don't give up on it!
I'm currently reading "Remember Me" (great story BTW) and after finishing the first chapter I glanced down at the notes your fans left. I saw two comments I can help you with.
Quote: because there is some awesome chiz later. the bigining is more of a filler to the bigger parts and ITS KILLING ME NOT TO BE ABLE TO WRITE THE GOOD STUFF!!!
The answer is: write ahead. Put the good stuff down on paper. You can leave yourself notes (in parentheses) as you go to help remind you about your call-backs, flashbacks, etc. It's too distracting to write each chapter as the story goes and find yourself distracted by the cool stuff you really want to write. This just hurts you as a story-teller and a writer. Get the tale down first. edit and tie everything up smoothly later.
Quote: I'm working on the next chap now, but i keep getting distracted. i tend to get distracted a lot,
This is an easy fix. Write down 1 sentence that best describes your story or main character. This is not for the reader but for you. It should be a single image or thought that completely puts you in the mood to write, whether it is a descriptive element of your character or that particular scene, it should fill you with everything holy about your story. EX: in order to 'get' into Greysons head I use the line; Looks like...: Difficult to tell through all the cigarette smoke but. this line is in his character description and it tells me immediately and exactly how he will act no matter what the situation. this is my line to put me into the characters head. You can do the same thing for a scene.
Just a bit of hammering from the SilverSmith. ;) Now, I want to read the rest of the story. :D
Quote: because there is some awesome chiz later. the bigining is more of a filler to the bigger parts and ITS KILLING ME NOT TO BE ABLE TO WRITE THE GOOD STUFF!!!
The answer is: write ahead. Put the good stuff down on paper. You can leave yourself notes (in parentheses) as you go to help remind you about your call-backs, flashbacks, etc. It's too distracting to write each chapter as the story goes and find yourself distracted by the cool stuff you really want to write. This just hurts you as a story-teller and a writer. Get the tale down first. edit and tie everything up smoothly later.
Quote: I'm working on the next chap now, but i keep getting distracted. i tend to get distracted a lot,
This is an easy fix. Write down 1 sentence that best describes your story or main character. This is not for the reader but for you. It should be a single image or thought that completely puts you in the mood to write, whether it is a descriptive element of your character or that particular scene, it should fill you with everything holy about your story. EX: in order to 'get' into Greysons head I use the line; Looks like...: Difficult to tell through all the cigarette smoke but. this line is in his character description and it tells me immediately and exactly how he will act no matter what the situation. this is my line to put me into the characters head. You can do the same thing for a scene.
Just a bit of hammering from the SilverSmith. ;) Now, I want to read the rest of the story. :D
I completely agree with you SS! :)
Great feedback! :D
How dyou feel about reading stuff?
Living In A World of Her Own
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Finding Grace (I've actually rewritten a lot of this, so I'll repost it soon)
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
A Turn of Unexpected Events
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Great feedback! :D
How dyou feel about reading stuff?
Living In A World of Her Own
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Finding Grace (I've actually rewritten a lot of this, so I'll repost it soon)
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
A Turn of Unexpected Events
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Thank You Vice Mob Leader. We should have one of those famous 'backseat Limousine meetings' later. lol
I feel great about reading stuff. :D I have another thanksgiving celebration to attend later today but I will read your stuff as soon as possible and see what, if anything needs a bit of hammering. ;)
I feel great about reading stuff. :D I have another thanksgiving celebration to attend later today but I will read your stuff as soon as possible and see what, if anything needs a bit of hammering. ;)
Haha, I've always thought 'backseat limo meetings' would be cool! :D
Thanks, I'd really appreciate any comments!
Thanks, I'd really appreciate any comments!
Great story Shiney (AKA The Polisher).
Go ahead and write the 'cool parts' and I bet afterwards, you will want to completely rewrite your opening to suit. Once you do that I bet you will see your opening as cool too. ;)
Go ahead and write the 'cool parts' and I bet afterwards, you will want to completely rewrite your opening to suit. Once you do that I bet you will see your opening as cool too. ;)
Vice Mob Leader: I read your first story and it's very good. You have a great knack for dialog and imagery. The characters were real and I actually felt their emotion. :D I will read your other stories later.
Reading all these wonderful stories made me decide to get off my butt and finish a second draft to my first micro story: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Be honest please. I am trying to learn the art of writing.
Reading all these wonderful stories made me decide to get off my butt and finish a second draft to my first micro story: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
Be honest please. I am trying to learn the art of writing.
Devlin wrote: "Vice Mob Leader: I read your first story and it's very good. You have a great knack for dialog and imagery. The characters were real and I actually felt their emotion. :D I will read your othe..."
Thank you! :) I'll definitely have a read of your story!
Thank you! :) I'll definitely have a read of your story!
I just added a rewrite to a simple (and happy) tale of love: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
I hope you like it.
I hope you like it.
Devlin wrote: ""A Turn of Unexpected Events" is amazing! I loved it! :D"
Haha thank you.. I had to do it for school work.. but it was soo much fun! :) And completely 'out there'
Haha thank you.. I had to do it for school work.. but it was soo much fun! :) And completely 'out there'
Yeah I have considered publishing it as a children's story.. I thought maybe write a few more and create a compilation?
I loved Winter's End! :)
I loved Winter's End! :)
Absolutely, it's a great story. It's light-hearted and oh, so cute. And who doesn't fear being swallowed up by giant, fluffy marshmallows. lol
Thank You. I got everything ready today to do a major overhaul on the story and, after reading it. I didn't want to change a thing. lol I just corrected my voice issues and now I'm thinking of adding to the story for a few more chapters.
Thank You. I got everything ready today to do a major overhaul on the story and, after reading it. I didn't want to change a thing. lol I just corrected my voice issues and now I'm thinking of adding to the story for a few more chapters.
lol. I just got a comment from the Mob Leader that I should update my story SOON! But I'm still too lazy to put the next chapter on paper. I easily get distracted. And I realized I haven't edited the typo errors in that story yet :(
Now could you please tell me what you think about this? Love Takes Time
Now could you please tell me what you think about this? Love Takes Time
"My Ever So Normal Life". I love it Shiney. Great story. :D
I'll get to your story soon Ellie. :D
I'll get to your story soon Ellie. :D
I know :)) There are still several chapters that are impatiently pounding at my head begging to be written. lol.
I just added a new chapter to my story! At long last! lol.
Hey guys, could you read my story? it's called By your side and I wrote it during NaNo last month. Could you comment and let me know what you think please? :)http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
I created a new story: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...
It has a POV issue but I want to know if I can leave it. I like the effect it gives to the story but I don't want it to be confusing to the reader.
What does the mob think?
It has a POV issue but I want to know if I can leave it. I like the effect it gives to the story but I don't want it to be confusing to the reader.
What does the mob think?
Devlin wrote: "I liked it. :D When will you post the next chapter?"I posted 2 more chapters up for my story By your side :)




So if you're reviewing stuff, either just say what you're reviewing and who it's by.. or post a link.. (feel free to do this for your own stories if you want them reviewed!) We'll try our best! :D