Chuck Semon

“Someone said I had smiled. But to my father, it was not a smile, just a small beautiful moment because he had not lost me forever.”
― Malala Yousafzai, I Am Malala: The Story of the Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban

“I don’t like anything pointing at me, dollface, that includes an umbrella, a finger, or a gun, got it?”
― A.G. Russo, The Cases Nobody Wanted

“Yesterday, I asked a robot, Gumball I think, do you know Murphy’s law of gravitation? It answered, ‘No, sir, I know only Newton’s and Einstein’s laws of gravitation; I don’t know Murphy’s law.’ I replied, ‘Eh, Gumball, the slice always falls with the buttered side to the floor. That’s Murphy’s law.’” Everyone burst into laughter.”
― Todor Bombov, Homo Cosmicus 2: Titan

“We used to manage quite well when she was away sitting for artists, because in those days we lived mostly on bread, vegetables and eggs; but now that we can afford some meat or even chickens, I keep coming to grief. I scrubbed some rather dirty-looking chops with soap which proved very lingering, and I did not take certain things out of a chicken that I ought to have done.”
― Dodie Smith