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Jack

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Jack’s Quotes

“Oh, so how did the marrige counsling go?

Well let's just say after it was over there where two people who thought I was an ass. And i was paying both of 'um.”
― Jeff Dunham

15 likes

“Achmed the Dead Terrorist: Knock, knock.
Jeff Dunham: Who's there?
Achmed the Dead Terrorist: Me, I kill you!”
― Jeff Dunham

52 likes

“Jef-f, Dun-Ham, dot com!!”
― Jeff Dunham

tags: humor, jeff-dunham

34 likes

“Jeff: The drive from the valley?
Peanut: Was bad as hell!
Jeff: Traffic?
Peanut: Sucked like hell!
Jeff: Drivers?
Peanut: Angry as hell!
Jeff: And you?
Peanut: Were scared as hell!
Jeff: Parking?
Peanut: Sucked more like hell!
Jeff: So?
Peanut: We're in hell! ”
― Jeff Dunham

59 likes

“Walter: Do you see this lovely young lady sitting right here in the front row? Do you see her? Do you see her?
Jeff: Yeah.
Walter: Oh well!”
― Jeff Dunham

15 likes

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