Kate

“A man unknowingly hurts his partner by speaking in an uncaring manner and then goes on to explain why she should not be upset. He mistakenly assumes she is resisting the content of his point of view, when really his unloving delivery is what upsets her. Because he does not understand her reaction, he focuses more on explaining the merit of what he is saying instead of correcting the way he is saying it. He has no idea that he is starting an argument; he thinks she is arguing with him. He defends his point of view while she defends herself from his sharpened expressions, which are hurtful to her.”
― John Gray, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex — A Couples Guide

“Questioning ourselves for being "oversensitive" is a common way that women, in particular, disqualify our legitimate anger and hurt.
...The fact that some of us feel more vulnerable than others in a particular context does not mean we are weak or lesser in any way.”
― Harriet Lerner, Why Won’t You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts

“Human nature dictates that it is virtually impossible to accept advice from someone unless you feel that that person understands you.”
― John Gottman, The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work

“But the knowing was visceral: if I became a mother, I’d lose myself.”
― Kate Bolick, Spinster: Making a Life of One's Own