Evan

“Nowhere is the necessity for courage and good faith more evident than in the search to establish the truth about relations between people, for in this process lies the threat of annihilation. As A struggles with B to lay bare the meaning of their conduct towards each other, bravely trying to stay clear of the slide into self-deception, to confess and accept his fear and vulnerability, to acknowledge his defensive strategies, his meannesses and malignancies and desperate cravings, so B can with a single act of bad faith betray the reciprocity of this process, perhaps by 'closing down' A with some sort of objectifying label which sends him spinning like a deflating balloon into the distant, icy, sterile reaches of isolation.”
― David Smail, Illusion and Reality: The Meaning of Anxiety

“If you want to know why you are unhappy, look to the world around you, and if you want to change how you feel, look to see if the world can be changed. As an individual, this is just about all you can do.”
― David Smail, How to Survive without Psychotherapy

“You can no more banish hatred from your heart than you can summon love into it, and the wisest course is to accept that, whatever you feel, you probably have good reasons for it.”
― David Smail, How to Survive without Psychotherapy

“Do as you would be done by' informs every action of the superconscientious person, but it never seems to occur to him or her that this is a rule which should apply to anyone else, so that 'others should treat me as I treat them' simply doesn't enter the frame.”
― David Smail, How to Survive without Psychotherapy