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“I close my eyes again, but it’s all I can see, all I can feel, all I can hear. His skin, his arms, his legs, his hands too strong, his breath on me, muscles stretching, bones cracking, body breaking, me getting weaker, fading. These things. It’s all there is.”
― The Way I Used to Be
― The Way I Used to Be
“All you have to do is act like you’re normal and okay, and people start treating you that way.”
― The Way I Used to Be
― The Way I Used to Be
“I don’t know a lot of things. I don’t know why I didn’t hear the door click. Why I didn’t lock the damn door to begin with. Or why it didn’t register that something was wrong, so mercilessy wrong when I felt the mattress shift under his weight. Why I didn’t scream when I opened my eyes and saw him crawling between my sheets. Or why I didn’t to try to fight him when I still stood a chance.”
― The Way I Used to Be
― The Way I Used to Be
“Ignore the taste in your mouth, the sticky dampness of the sheets, the fire radiating through your thighs, the nauseating pain. This bulletlike thing that ripped through you and got lodged in your gut somehow.”
― The Way I Used to Be
― The Way I Used to Be
“I feel these forbidden thoughts creep in sometimes without warning. Slow thoughts that always start quietly, like whispers you're not even sure you're hearing. And then they get louder and louder until they become every sound in the entire world. Thoughts that can't be undone.
Would anyone care?
Would anyone even fucking notice?
What if one day I just wasn't here anymore?
What if one day it all just stopped?
What if? What if? What if?”
― The Way I Used to Be
Would anyone care?
Would anyone even fucking notice?
What if one day I just wasn't here anymore?
What if one day it all just stopped?
What if? What if? What if?”
― The Way I Used to Be
Maryam’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Maryam’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
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Polls voted on by Maryam
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