Ridhii Asrani

“teenagers are never joking. when seeking to prove a point, principals and teachers should remember that teenagers are never, ever sarcasic or ironic. if they say "I wish someone would drop a bomb on this school right now," that means they have arranged for a nuclear arsenal to be emptied onto the school and should be immediately suspended and ridiculed. if they say they were merely coming up with a joking excuse to postpone a bio test, reply that all jokes are funny, and that since dropping a bomb on a school is not funny, it is therefore
not
a
joke.”
― David Levithan, The Realm of Possibility

“Big flashy things have my name written all over them. Well... not yet, give me time and a crayon.”
― Matt Smith

“I'm Cinderella. No, I'm better than Cinderella, because she only got the prince, didn't she? I'm Cinderella with fab teeth and a shit-hot job.”
― Sophie Kinsella, Remember Me?

“Likest thou jelly within thy doughnut?"

"Nay, but prithee, with sprinkles 'pon it instead, I said solemnly, and frosting of white.”
― Jim Butcher, Small Favor