Ali Self

“We were trying to understand, then, what her life was about to become. I think we’re still trying to understand.”
― Catherine Newman, We All Want Impossible Things

“It’s the anticipation I can’t handle. Loss lurks around every corner, and how do we prepare?”
― Catherine Newman, We All Want Impossible Things

“All of that caretaking,” I say. I lean back so I can look at her. I’m crying too. Crying and talking. “All of it’s in his bones. It’s the actual stuff of his body and brain. The placenta you made from scratch. Your milk from nursing him. All those pancakes and school-lunch sandwiches, all of that food and care.” She’s looking into my face, nodding, even though I am fully winging it now, panicking, words pouring out like I’m a hose on the weepy consolation setting. “Everything you’ve ever fed him,” I say. “His whole self is made completely out of your love.”
― Catherine Newman, We All Want Impossible Things

“Everyone dies, and yet it’s unendurable. There is so much love inside of us. How do we become worthy of it? And, then, where does it go? A worldwide crescendo of grief, sustained day after day, and only one tiny note of it is mine.”
― Catherine Newman, We All Want Impossible Things