“Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings”
― Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
― Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
“Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.”
― A Man Without a Country
― A Man Without a Country
“Everyone knows that the Internet is changing our lives, mostly because someone in the media has uttered that exact phrase every single day since 1993. However, it certainly appears that the main thing the Internet has accomplished is the normalization of amateur pornography. There is no justification for the amount of naked people on the World Wide Web, many of whom are clearly (clearly!) doing so for non-monetary reasons. Where were these people fifteen years ago? Were there really millions of women in 1986 turning to their husbands and saying, 'You know, I would love to have total strangers masturbate to images of me deep-throating a titanium dildo, but there's simply no medium for that kind of entertainment. I guess we'll just have to sit here and watch Falcon Crest again.”
― Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs: A Low Culture Manifesto
― Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs: A Low Culture Manifesto
“We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness. And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems—the ones that make you truly who you are—that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for. You’re looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: it's got to be the right wrong person—someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”
I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.”
― Daily Afflictions: The Agony of Being Connected to Everything in the Universe
I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.”
― Daily Afflictions: The Agony of Being Connected to Everything in the Universe
“And all I could do while I listened to this dude tell me how punk rock saved his life was think, Wow. Why did my friend waste all that time going to chemotherapy? I guess we should have just played him a bunch of shitty Black Flag records.”
― Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs: A Low Culture Manifesto
― Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs: A Low Culture Manifesto
Gabbie’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Gabbie’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
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