Nevada

“After everything they did to you, how can you stand me?" Neil asked...He gestured between them knowing Andrew would understand. "How is this okay?"
"It isn't a this," Andrew said.
"That's not what I'm asking. You know it isn't-Andrew wait!" he insisted but Andrew was turning away like he couldn't hear Neil anymore.
Neil reached for him, unwilling to let him leave without a real answer.
"No," Andrew said and Neil's hand froze a breath from Andrew's arm.
Andrew went still as well and they stood for a minute in awful silence.
Finally, Andrew looked back at him, but for a moment, Neil didn't know who he was looking at. In the space of one breath, Andrew's expression went so dark Neil almost retreated. Then Andrew was back, as calm and uncaring as always and he caught Neil's wrist to push his hand to his side. He dug his fingers in before letting go, not quite hard enough to hurt and said, "that's why."
Neil stopped when Andrew told him to. I wasn't much but it was more than enough.”
― Nora Sakavic, The King's Men