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Lee Draper

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“Some people say a person receives a position in this church through revelation, and others say they get it through inspiration, but I say they get it through relation. If I hadn't been related to Heber C. Kimball I wouldn't have been a damn thing in this church.”
J. Golden Kimball

“I may not always walk the straight and narrow, but I sure in hell try to cross it as often as I can.”
J. Golden Kimball

“What can God do for a liar who refuses to repent? Can the Lord save him? He can’t claim salvation. Baptizing him in water will not settle the trouble, unless you keep him under.”
J. Golden Kimball

“I don't know about this here eternal marriage business. But it seems to me that if you can't live with the sons-of-bitches on earth the Lord won't force you to remain with them in heaven.”
J. Golden Kimball

“I believe if I had a house in hell and a house in St. George, I'd rent out the one in St. George and live in hell. I really would.”
J. Golden Kimball
tags: humor

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