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Groucho Marx
“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
Groucho Marx

Robert Fulghum
“Until you have experienced raccoons mating underneath your bedroom at three in the morning, you have missed one of life's sensational moments.”
Robert Fulghum, All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten

Groucho Marx
“You know you haven't stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.”
Groucho Marx

Groucho Marx
“This isn't a particularly novel observation, but the world is full of people who think they can manipulate the lives of others merely by getting a law passed.”
Groucho Marx

Groucho Marx
“Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.”
Groucho Marx

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