Mark Dhas

“Rawr! I’m a duke of Hell, bitches!’ and then he was like, ‘This is my turf! Welcome to Castle Cocksucker!’ and then he was all, ‘You’re all gonna die!’ and then it was, ‘Fuck, this sword hurts!’ and finally he was like, ‘Oh fuck, I’m dead!”
― Elliott Kay, Good Intentions

“I mean, your species is responsible for Windows Vista.”
― Craig Alanson, Columbus Day

“Nobody’s ‘chosen’ for anything. You happen to be in one situation or another and you make your decisions based on who you are. Maybe you’re the right person for that situation, maybe you’re not. Hopefully you do the right thing for the world and you move on from there.”
― Elliott Kay, Good Intentions

“The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.”
― William Shakespeare, King Henry VI, Part 2